video, un:charon

[notimeforfailure]

Good evening, all. I think this is what is termed a 'bandwagon.' However, as I imagine we will all be busy dead, dying, or in the process of resurrecting soon, I thought I had better commit before October.

I'm opening a bakery and sweets shop.

[Lysithea pans the camera to a table that is covered with pans filled with dozens of buns, cakes, and confections of different colors. It really looks extremely well done. One would imagine that Lysithea applies herself with the same intensity to any task she undertakes.]

Everything will be sourced from traditional Fódlan desserts, passed down through family histories and collected by hand in this book. I've realized that if I'm not the one who makes these treats, I'm... never going to taste them again. So I thought I should share.

[The view changes to an enormous tome currently open to a page titled Saghert and Cream in script prominently displaying a luscious picture of some kind of fruit and cream concoction. It really looks like this was drawn by hand.]

I'm baking from my room for now. If you want anything here, you can drop by or I'll bring it over. If you want delivery, you've got to get at least a dozen, because frankly, I'm not running all over town to give you one sweet bun. I'll open a proper location when it's not Death Month.

...Thanks.

[She signs off after a moment's awkward hesitation, as if she's not sure what to do next.]

[video pt 2, ten minutes later]

It's -- me again. Upon further reflection, I have no idea how to run a business, at all, apart from the portion where you confidently declare it in public.

I would... appreciate advice.

And help. If you are willing to be paid in cake.

Comments

[entreats]

What--

[ It's a bit of a surprised word, cut off by that very same surprise and the need to think about where that question is coming from. It's not quite what Ange was going for, so it takes her some effort to go through this conversation backwards in her mind, trying to think of what she just said or did that made Lysithea say that..

But after a moment she seems to realise how she could've come across. ]

No, no, I meant-- in general! In general! [ Please, Ange, don't protest too much, or you'll give her the wrong idea all over again.. ] Do I even look like the kind of person you'd find in a bakery?

[notimeforfailure]

Well. Yes, actually.

Most bakeries are run by young women of any description.

[just saying]

If you change your mind, the offer is open. But you see? I asked somebody and was immediately rejected. It can't be that easy.

[entreats]

[ ...

One can almost hear the Jeopardy thinking music playing in the distance as Ange is processing what Lysithea is saying right now. Because something about it feels so wrong. She can't be the one to prove the opposite of the point she was trying to make, right?

.. Right?

And that means there's only one solution. Maybe Ange should put a bit more thought into it, but primal Need To Be Right instinct drives her to say, perhaps a bit too intensely for the content of her actual words: ]

I'll help you out in the bakery.

[ BURNING WITH DETERMINATION. By Ange standards, anyway. ]

[notimeforfailure]

Er.

[what's happening
why does ange look like she's about to set something on fire]

Is that... really what you want or are you just offering to prove your point? It's really alright; I don't want to pressure you. We're friends, right? I support whatever you choose to do.

...Of course, I wouldn't say no to the help of a friend.

[entreats]

I don't want you to feel like no one would help you.

[ Even though Ange is pretty sure other people would probably offer to help.. It's just how people in this place are. Way too nice.

But she doesn't want Lysithea to think, even for a moment, that no one would. ]

So if you get no other offers at all, I guess I wouldn't mind helping instead.

[notimeforfailure]

[that doesn't make her feel better ange!]

I --

Thanks.

[Lysithea takes a moment to figure out what exactly Ange is trying to do here and comes to the conclusion that probably? she wants to be a kind person, but doesn't actually want to help all that much.]

How about we just say this?

Come by for tea when you wish, and if I'm in the middle of a project, we can bake together. It will be more fun than work.

[entreats]

[ Maybe she's just trying to protect you for your own good, Lysithea.. Just wait until you notice that Ange instantly explodes any oven she touches.

It'll be a fun experience. ]

.. well.. [ It's only here that she starts looking a bit more reluctant - or perhaps it's just embarrassed, really. It's often that emotion that births reluctance of any kind within Ange. ]

As long as you can lead the whole baking experience. I don't know much about baking.

[ Yes, and yet she was offering to help.

SHE WAS JUST TRYING TO BE NICE, INDEED.. ]

[notimeforfailure]

[In that case, Ange goes on mixing duty. And spoon licking duty.]

That's alright.

You don't have to be a genius. You mix things, pour things, and then set them in a heated box. There's a little more complication involved, but I do think it's accessible to essentially everyone.

And if you really can't do it, you can always still have tea.

[entreats]

...

[ Ange is quiet.

Obviously so.

Because there's something she's majorly hesitating to mention here. But in the end she decides to try and not be a social wuss here, and just say it. Even if she's embarrassed about it. ]

One time I was mixing batter for pancakes, and it.. caught fire.

[ Please don't laugh at her. She's being vulnerable here, Lysithea!! ]

[notimeforfailure]

Erm.

[Lysithea notes the earnestly pained expression in Ange's eyes and forbears from making an overly critical comment.]

...Might I ask... how?

[Was she stirring at supersonic speeds, or...?]

[entreats]

Well, it'd sure help if I knew that.

[ In other words: she has absolutely no idea.

This Just Happens Sometimes. ]

The other time I made a cake together with Ruby, she ended up losing her housekeys, and it turned out we baked them into the cake.

[ ... ]

So I guess I'm not very good at it.

[ An understatement of a conclusion to all of that. ]

[notimeforfailure]

Hmmmm.

[Lysithea considers these solemn words while making a strong effort to keep a smile from spreading across her face.]

You know, that sounds like a challenge to me. If I'm going to be a great baker... then being able to teach the unteachable should be a part of my path forward, right?

Unrelatedly, I want to experience this for myself. Perhaps you have a kind of heretofore unidentified magic.

[entreats]

[ There's a soft sound, as if Ange is about to start some half-embarrassed protest at the idea that she is, in any way, unteachable.

Though that urge is quickly suppressed the moment she notices an opening for some deadpan when Lysithea continues to speak. That's clearly so much better than actually expressing her embarrassment. ]

I'm not sure if I want to be known as Ange, the Witch of Kitchen Disasters.

[notimeforfailure]

That's too negative. How about Ange, the Witch of Flambé?

[that's probably a real magic spell
probably]

I speak facetiously, but I think I can handle a few explosions here and there, even ones that have no earthly reason for happening. You have no need to fret when you're around me.

[see: words that would be played in slow-mo at lysithea's funeral]

[entreats]

[ We've found the real reason Lysithea isn't going to live for long anymore. ]

Are you sure you should be that happy about inviting explosions into your life?

[ Lysithea? Lysithea? ]

.. but if you really don't mind, then I guess I could try to learn a thing or two from you. It might come in useful.

[notimeforfailure]

[Look she has like, decades of newfound life to enjoy now, she's riding a high.]

There is never a time when knowing how to make cake isn't useful.

[What if Ange is trapped on a deserted island and a plane drops off supplies but those supplies are crates of flour, vanilla, yeast, and sugar? You can't eat flour; that would just be silly.]

Before you leave my kitchen, you'll know how to create at least one thing. That's a guarantee.

[and that one thing is : despair]

[entreats]

Are you sure you aren't aiming a little too high there?

[ That's not even her doubting Lysithea's abilities to teach someome something.

It's 100% Ange doubting her own abilities to.. ever make something vaguely edible.. ]

Or are you saying you're going to lock me in there until it happens? That's illegal, you know.

[notimeforfailure]

Laws are probably different here in Trench.

[Lysithea responds cheerfully.]

If trapping people in uncomfortable spaces was illegal, I wouldn't have been teleported into a well to drown with a monster girl last week.

You'll be fine in the kitchen.

[:)]

[entreats]

...

Can I at least call my girlfriend first to let her know that another girl is going to be confining me to her kitchen for an indefinite amount of time?

[ help. ]

[notimeforfailure]

I'd like to point out that you volunteered.

[just saying]

All humor aside, feel free to come by whenever you please, Ange. I'm sure it will be a more positive experience than you imagine.

[it won't
but perhaps we might leave them on this positive note before lysithea learns what a Terrible Mistake she's making.]

yes, we can wrap it here!

[entreats]

[ Lysitea's house won't survive the winter.. ]

I.. guess I can stop by sometime.. [ How Ange, an actual 20 year old at this point, manages to sound like a toddler that doesn't want to visit the dentist while saying those words is a small miracle. ]

So we'll see by then.