video; un: shiro

[shiro2hero]

[Oh hi Shiro, long time no see on the network. That's because this is a last-ditch effort. He looks pretty darn not great, despite the fact it's Sleep Season for Warmbloods. Maybe it's the Arena. Maybe it's the River. Something honestly, sincerely traumatic that's happened already.]

[His face is in his hands, hunched over the counter in his kitchen. The omni in front of him. Voice haggard and quiet. Like he has a migraine.]

I will pay... however much anyone wants. For coffee beans. Espresso beans. Don't even have to be cooked. Roasted. Doesn't matter.

[... Or it's caffeine withdrawl.]

Or tea leaves. I don't care.

[Please, he is Suffering.]

Comments

[shiro2hero]

If we can... I can't find it. Anywhere.

Ration what you have.

[The most grave of warnings, right here.]

[kyley_b]

Oh my god. I didn't, I just assumed there was more...

Dude there HAS to be some, or something like it. I will search this entire fucking city to find some.

[shiro2hero]

I sincerely cannot find... any. None whatsoever.

Friend of mine says he can't find it either. Pretty sure we're done for.

[kyley_b]

No. I refuse. I've been turned into a squid, dumped in a creepy city where all the clothes make me look like Oliver Twist, smacked around, missed important holidays, and I might be losing my mind, so they can't take all the coffee on top of that! NO.

I'm sending my fucking whale to find coffee! [Uh. Kyle? That sentence makes no sense without context.]

[shiro2hero]

... Okay, I was with you until the whale.

What whale?

[kyley_b]

Oh. I have a whale. Don't you have a something? An animal that sort of materializes out of smoke?

Willzyx! Go find us coffee!

[A rather diminutive orca cruises by in the background, pausing to stare at Kyle a moment.]

Fuck you, we're desperate men here! Ugh. [Kyle turns back to the screen.] Stupid whale...

Okay. This is a port city, right? So our best bet might be to hit up ocean traders. We'll need something worth trading, obviously.

[shiro2hero]

Oh. Oh those guys... Yeah. Sorry, that's - my brain's not all here I guess.

[Really not all here.]

Hey, that's an idea. Worth a try anyway. As long as we can find something worth trading, we can give it a shot.

[kyley_b]

I understand. Caffeine withdrawal is a bitch.

People seem to like shiny shit. I bet I can scrounge up some fancy rocks, or I've got like, some cooking implements.

Don't worry, dude. I'll help you. We're all in this together.

[shiro2hero]

I think we might have to go beyond shiny things here, man.

[These people seem advanced enough - ]

Maybe we can check the markets. See if we have anything that's in low supply here that we can offer.

[kyley_b]

Maybe. But I've seen it used for trade.

Yes! Dude, yes. That's smart.

We're gonna figure this shit out somehow.

[shiro2hero]

My brain occasionally has good ideas where its coffee supply is concerned.

[That's a lie, Shiro, you have good ideas more often than that.]

[kyley_b]

Aw, I bet you have lots of em.

I'm Kyle. And I swear if I find coffee, you'll be the first dude I tell.

[shiro2hero]

I'll probably appreciate that more after the headache.

Thanks, though. I'm Shiro. Are you ... were you in Deerington? Before this?

[kyley_b]

Yeah.

Nope. I'm from Colorado. But right before this I was on an alien planet, which was pretty cool. This is a lot creepier.

[shiro2hero]

Oh yeah? What kind of planet was it?

Maybe I've been there.

[kyley_b]

It was like, totally trashed. These aliens got kicked off their home and were getting us to help them rebuild it. Or so we figured.

...you do look kinda familiar, actually.

[shiro2hero]

Do you remember the name of it at all? Or the alien race?

... do I?

[kyley_b]

Agra-10. The aliens were the Agrii. But those of us basically kidnapped came from all over. There were a lot of jedis. Jedi? Whatever the plural is. They're really touchy.

Yeah. Maybe my brains are scrambled.

[shiro2hero]

Jedi? Really?

[Shiro you big NERD...]

[kyley_b]

Really! With the light sabers and everything!

[shiro2hero]

I love that.

And hey. There's at least one here, too.

[kyley_b]

I've met Maul. He's kinda cool.

[shiro2hero]

... Wait, he's a Jedi?

[RECORD SCREECH]

[kyley_b]

Well, no, he's like... the opposite end of the same THING as a Jedi. They all use the same power source thing? But the jedis think they're really awesome and good because I guess they don't kill people as much.

[shiro2hero]

Speaking from Deerington experience?

Yeah, the Jedi hasn't killed or maimed nearly as many people as Maul has. Pretty sure Obi-Wan has killed no people.