Video; UN: Spider-Man

[quipsandthwips]

Hey, everyone! Spider-Man here — AKA your favorite Peter! Sorry to all the other Peters, but them's just the breaks. I've worked too hard the last three years around here to not get top-billed spot as Peter! ... Alright, alright, maybe I'll share with Peter Graham. But only because he's as old and tired as me. We're like a thousand years old in spirit, right? Right. The Peter Pack old boys.

Anyway, I used to give people informational packets, back when we lived in, uh... Deerington. You know, in Maine? You remember that old chestnut? Yeah, me too. Lucky me, my house and lab came with me! A little less furbished, but I do what I can. I'll be starting up my new job as a teacher here at the school soon, because old habits die hard, but I suppose I don't mind doing some teaching outside of the school, too, sooooo...

If you wanna know anything about the world that existed before Trench, I can answer questions as best I can. You guys all deserve that. And, uh. If it helps — I've attached a copy of the PPPP(S). Yup, that's right! The original! The O.G., as the hip kids call it.

[FILE ATTACHED.]

Super sorry if anything's confusing; I can fill out any of the weird blanks or things that don't quite make sense. And for everyone who doesn't need this info because they swam their little squid tuckuses behind me.... Hey! How's it going! Tell me a good joke, if you've got one. Let me know how you're settling while you're at it. I've been pretty good, personally. Lots of fighting, y'know. Creepy monsters away from the outskirts of town.

So basically nothing's changed.

Well, nothing other than the month, I guess! Wow, wait, is it already a new month? Can't believe...

[He trails off, and seems to realize, belatedly, loudly, and with great concern:]



OH NO, NOT OCTOBER!

Comments

[quipsandthwips]

[He huffs, amused.]

You know I spent a huge amount of time freefalling through thirty stories on a daily basis back home, right?

Do I look squishable?

[armd]

(shudder. don't remind her.)

No. You look soooo big, and soooooo strong. (swoon)

[quipsandthwips]

Oh!

Thank you so much for noticing!

[;)]

[armd]

(pbpbpbpffptpbt)

Yeah yeah.

(she glances away, but she looks a little pleased with herself all the same.) Well, I'd better let you get back to all the hard work you're doing. Call if October is too tricky for you to handle alone, okay.

(she's teasing, but also she means it. she cares about him, and wants to help if she can.)

[quipsandthwips]

[He salutes, because of course he does.]

Aye, aye, madam captain! Don't hesitate to call if you need an Uber deliveryman!

[peter she probably has no clue what an uber deliveryman is]

[armd]

(... madame captain?)

Uh huh. (like... the best deliveryman? whatever. that tracks, she won't comment.)

Bye.