Video; un: darkness

[survivalthroughhate]

[The video turns on and it's Maul, using his omen Venge to broadcast it. He looks serious like he's about to talk to Trench about a topic of great importance.]

For those unaware, this is the time of year when the Pthumerian or half-Pthumerian known as Santa Claus comes to Trench towards the end of the month. He can shift into many forms to fit into your home but most often looks like this.

[Venge, his Omen, turns to look at the picture that has been sketched of a fairly traditional 21st century Santa Maul has set up next to him. Yes, this presentation comes with pictures, all made by Maul himself]

Santa is one of the more benevolent Pthumerians though he is possessed of much stealth and cunning, making it difficult for people to interact with him. He is associated with deer as Sodder was but his chosen favored deer are reindeer. He uses his powers to make them fly.

[Another picture, this time showing the team of flying reindeer that looks like it was copied from an illustration of 'Twas The Night Before Christmas. This one is a little rougher, especially the reindeer, for drawing animals isn't Maul's forte.]

He loves the scent of pine and prefers if there are wreaths or full trees made of them left in the home when he visits. Those who leave him offerings of food and drink he will reward with presents. The offerings can be small such as this.

[Again, another picture showing a glass of milk and plate of cookies are shown with an equal sign followed by a small stack of presents underneath a Christmas tree that has been decorated rather....oddly with things like animal skulls and black ornaments on it.]

But he also accepts larger offerings if you wish for larger gifts. There appears to be no known way to prevent him from entering your homes but he doesn't appear to seem interested in causing harm to people, even those who fail to provide him hospitality. I have yet to run into him personally the past two years, but if anyone sees him, please let me know. I wish to test my fighting skills against him.

[.............Yes, Darth Maul just said he wants to fight Santa Claus. Will wonders never cease?]

Comments

[survivalthroughhate]

The tree appears to be some sort of tradition though I'm not quite sure how it all correlates with the offerings and presents. The one in the tree is just how I would choose to decorate mine.

[A nice Hot Topic gothic Christmas tree to suit Maul's tastes.]

[opheliac]

Huuuh...

( she muses over this for a little bit. )

Right! — I'll get myself a tree then. 'Cuz it's tradition and all that, he'll want that and my gift will be even bigger.

[survivalthroughhate]

A very good plan.

[Maul wonders if he should make his own offering a bit larger this year or stick with the traditional milk and cookies.]

Do you plan to try to fight him as well if you are able to catch sight of him?

[opheliac]

It's tempting. But he doesn't harm us, right? Just swoops in and gives us gifts.

( a beat. )

— 'Less Santa Pthumerian is that demon who broke into my house some months ago. Then he's done for.

( this gets her thinking, however. )

Ya know, maybe setting traps won't be such a bad idea.

[survivalthroughhate]

It will be a good test of his skills. If he can avoid the traps, then your offering will be even more appreciated I'm sure.

[Maul's absolute conviction in believing and convincing everyone else as well is gonna come back to bite him so hard later on this month when evil Santa starts ]

[opheliac]

Then it's lookin' like Jinxie here has got some device making to do! You oughta do it, too. You're good at that stuff, right?

[survivalthroughhate]

I wouldn't have made a good assassin if I didn't know a number of ways to trap, maim, and kill people now, would I?

[opheliac]

Okay, okay! Then you gotta tell me what sort of traps you're settin' up. Please, please, pplleeeease!!

[survivalthroughhate]

Have you ever used razor wire before? It would kill most normal sapients but in his case I imagine it will only slow him down.

[opheliac]

I've used wire to activate another trap but not razor wire.

[survivalthroughhate]

For most people, it'll slice them up like a knife going through butter. Good for slitting throats and causing them to lose fingers and toes. But for a Pthumerian who can shapeshift, the threat will be minimal.

[opheliac]

Oooo! — Jinx likey! I know what I'm lookin' for later.

[survivalthroughhate]

Always happy to help give you new ideas.

[This is why Maul was still on and would forever be on the Dark Side.]