un: timaeusTestified | text | Yow Ease (forwarded to Jan 1st) (NSFW)

[givehead]

Out of respect to delicate souls, please consider the follow content warnings before reading this post: NSFW content, sex, so much sex, fetishes, kinks, sex toys. Please avert your pure eyes and scroll past the orange.

Anyway, now that that bullshit's out of the way...

Do you need to get off? Are you insecure about your sexuality? Confused? Do you want to explore new avenues in your current relationship? Do you want to feel sexy and confident in your own skin?

I have the solution for you: me.

Or rather my new shop Yow Ease. You can swing by and pick up toys to spice up your life, costumes, ropes, unique furniture, or if you just need some basic sexual advice, or if you need instructional videos on shibari or how to use a strap or different positions...Whatever you need, I can provide. Or in theory, find out a way to provide.

I take commissions. Meaning I can make specific toys or outfits or whatever. I don't judge people's preferences because frankly, that shit's all a social scam anyway, and I don't really care what your junk is. I can find something to suit you and your needs. Probably.

I recognize that a lot of people feel shy about this kind of stuff so I have automatically privatized this whole post. So you don't need to sweat it if you have questions or requests. No one will see your shit but me.

You're welcome.

ooc: Dirk is a paleblood so he will likely influence characters to be more honest in their responses to this video per january's influences :')

Comments

text; un: liontamer

[chickenchoicejudy]

dude. dude.

why are you so cool???

text

[givehead]

It is one of the greatest mysteries of the universe: "Why are the Striders so fucking cool?"

Genetics, man. Pure raw badass genetics.

text | un: quibbler

[creidim]

[ Most of this has her bright red from behind the screen. She has... absolutely no idea what half of these things mean, even if she's aware they're obviously sex-related. Toys? Ropes? Shibari? ...straps—?

Why does a lot of it sound quite painful—?

Thank Merlin for texts. ]

So you're just... willingly putting yourself out there for answering questions? About... sex things?

text

[givehead]

(This poor woman.)

Yeah, why not? A lot of people never allow themselves proper education about the subject. It causes unnecessary confusion that can permanently impact a person's whole life.

text; username: grollschwert

[hauntedsavior]

Good name for the shop.
Not super interested personally right now.
Don't even know if it all works down there the same way anymore, and I still got a mouth.
But hey, I like the initiative.
Know a couple people who are probably gonna stop by whether they reply here or not.

text

[givehead]

You're the only person here that caught the name so far. Thank you. Glad someone is of high taste around here.

No problem. There's nothing wrong with not doing the horizontal tango.

Hope they do. People could do with the stress relief.

text; un: wulala

[royalfling]

[ Wu was going to ask something relatively innocuous about toys: what are they? How do you use them for sex? Can he have one, please? But as soon as he starts typing, something completely different comes out because of Dirk's paleblood influence ]

You know honestly I do need some advice!!!!! My boyfriend got all corrupted in December, all burning and flaking and being super mean. So we haven't had sex in like five weeks!!!! Five!!!!!!

I don't know what advice I need I just need to tell somebody. And I need to have sex with him again. I told you that he's hot, right? He's like super hot. Like one of the hottest guys there is, and there are so many hot guys in Trench!! A plethora of hot guys!!!!

text

[givehead]

(Oh this poor bastard. Dirk's heart goes out to him - seriously. But this was more complex than just a typical dry spell.)

Have you tried actively seducing him?

He might be caught in that headspace from last month. Might be feeling guilty for being mean. That can be a real boner-killer.

text | un: boneadept

[necrosaint]

[ the paleblood thing hits another person. Harrow was going to say absolutely nothing. Harrow does not say absolutely nothing. ]

I am absolutely confused about my sexuality

Preferences are a social scam?

I—what if one is uncomfortable. With. Possibly having a sexuality.

text

[givehead]

The idea of requiring people to feel forced to label something as fluid and open-ended as sexuality or gender was practically designed to give another reason for people to treat each other poorly.

It constructs the idea of people feeling obligated to feel certain ways. Preferences shouldn't be so complex. If you're interested in someone then you're interested. What else really matters?

Heteronormativity pretty much crippled people's ability to feel comfortable with the most natural parts of themselves.

There's nothing wrong with feeling uncomfortable about having a sexuality. But can I ask what about it makes you uncomfortable?

[Private][UN:A_Wesker013][CW: Sexual repulsion/dysphoria, workplace harassment + murder referenced]

[subject_013]

[CW: Misanthropy/hatred of humanity/human biology. In short, Wesker being Wesker...]

I'm trying to maintain some decorum and diplomacy in my response. However....

Is this really necessary? We live in a world with limited resources, plagued with blood-linked conditions, and you're putting some of those resources toward this most pointless and revolting aspect of biology.

People like you remind me of that one CEO of the last pharmaceutical company I worked for, who couldn't keep her hands off me to save her life (and there's one iteration of my world of origin where I made sure she paid just that price). And the people who knew considered me oh so fortunate to 'enjoy' (their word) her attentions. The fact that I am a biological male and she a biological female didn't help. Reverse the genders/gender roles (? Things would be so much simpler if humans had evolved beyond the delusion that they 'need' this aspect) and it would have been a completely different story.

You lot need to use the three-pound mass of neural tissue at the top of the spine for purposes far nobler and more creative than mere serving as a battery to power whatever exists in the lower ventral area. This place could have solved the problem of Corruption and/or Beasthood by now, if people - broadly defined - weren't mollocking about like rabbits. <

[Someone clearly has more issues than the National Geographic magazine...]

[Text]CW: Sexual repulsion/dysphoria, workplace harassment + murder referenced]

[givehead]

(Oh it's this dude again. Damn. He stares at the text for about three minutes before laughing to himself. This was almost funny at this point.)

Why does it feel like you have a bit of a hate boner for me?

Really though. Why does this bother you so much that some people want to have sex? You realize one of the biggest treatments for corruption in this place is physical and emotional companionship. There is a reason Night Walkers are so well respected.

I would consider parasitic worms to be a little more revolting than sex personally, but I guess we all have opinions.

On a side note - someone who is positive about sex doesn't mean they are going to sexually harass everyone like your boss. It's not sexy pushing someone who clearly doesn't want you back.

(Okay, he feels kind of bad for this dude actually.)

un: tabris

[peripheries]

[He reads it all (he can read okay!! In three languages!!!). But nothing much grabs his attention. All that stuff... it's what adults do or whatever. Still... why not ask.]

How do you get a boy to like you first though.

text

[givehead]

(Holy shit. This is so pure. He remembered being this young and hopeless about boys.)

It's not really about getting someone to like you. You can never actually control how someone feels about you.

(And boy, did he learn that the hard way.)

text; un: naruhodo

[convene]

What does shibari have to do with sex?

text

[givehead]

Technically it was originally called something like kinbaku-bi. But either way, it's rope-centric bondage. It's all about the aesthetics of how you can tie someone up.

text; un: asogi

[truerevival]

[Kazuma had been shown how to use his comm, and much as he had avoided it at first there is a level of curiosity that comes with having newer technology at hand. So why, in all the worlds, is this the first post he finds.

Why is he commenting on it?]

A form of toture is something people would want to learn to do for...pleasure?

[Shibari. He means the shibari. 1890s Japan was a wild time, and as far as he's aware there's no eroticism to be had with the practice.]

text

[givehead]

(It's his lucky day apparently...Or something...)

There is an entire kink community that revolves around pain mixed with pleasure. When we feel pain, certain endorphins are released. That mixed with sexual pleasure can create an intense and satisfying experience for some.

It also can help create and maintain a relationship based on trust.

(Oh. Shit wait. No he's catching up now.)

Shibari was a newer term used. Kinbaku is probably more traditional.

Voice; un: ...

[opress]

[Dirk was such a strange human in any and all iterations. Savage didn't even pretend to understand the guy, yet on some level, he still did.]

Don't most of these advice things require show and tell?

[He was the opposite of the possessive or jealous sort. This was, in fact, his deadpan version of teasing. If one squinted.]

Voice

[givehead]

(He switches to voice purely for Savage's sake. The smirk is evident in his voice when he responds.)

That's a fairly elementary approach to education. What kind of teacher would I be if I couldn't learn to adapt to more appropriate methods?

(That is the world's most beat around the bush statement that he wasn't planning on whipping out his dick for every presentation.)

But for some, I might provide more personal lessons.

text | un: katherine

[manipulative]

[ oh, ho, ho, happy new year to katherine. ]

Are your ropes able to hold a very, very strong person in place?

Text

[givehead]

Not the ones I currently have, but I can make some no problem. Might be a good idea to regularly keep that stocked anyway in a place filled with Super Sleepers.

In the meantime, do you want a specific color? How strong are we talking?

text; un: violet

[virtuosital]

This isn't at all related to your post, but I might have to ask you how you make your font colorful.
But, in proper response: would you accept someone asking to learn about shibari and perhaps a means to speak to people about these sorts of insecurities as more of a business aspect than me asking for myself? I'm a Nightwalker, it's simply something that I'm going to run into at some point.

text

[givehead]

(Dirk immediately sends her a screenshot of the specific HTML coding used for changing font colors.)

This should help. Let me know if you can't quite figure it out still.

I would absolutely accept that. Us Nightwalkers gotta stick together. So, do you want to unpack the shibari thing first or the actual handling of this content to the general public?

text; UN: TripleJ

[kyley_b]

i am willing to vouch for your professionalism and quality of goods. ANONYMOUSLY.

text

[givehead]

Wow. Already that satisfied with the product? I'm honored.

text | un: givemeyourown

[unsheathedfromreality]

[Another unwitting victim of the paleblood since what he intended to dictate was not:]

This would be so much more interesting if I weren't dead.

[...]

Said with great regret.

text

[givehead]

Does your plumbing not work the same? Or is it more of an emotional disconnect?

If so, there are still ways to be intimate with someone that can be equally satisfying.

For the record, I am not against necrophilia. Just saying.

(Listen. He liked flirting with this guy, okay.)

text | un: kd6-3.7

[obeir]

I could've used the advice a while ago.

[ Immediately after typing the words, K stares at the screen in bewilderment. He... hadn't intended to share those thoughts, had he? Now he isn't sure. ]

I don't anticipate needing these services myself anymore but it's good you're making them available to those who do.

text

[givehead]

Might still be able to use this advice in the future.

(Dirk, on the other hand, was slowly starting to realize there was something about this post spurring people to be way more open than they typically would be.)

Did you pledge a vow of celibacy? No judgment if you did.

Thanks. Sex can be overwhelming for a lot of people. Kind of seems like this place is sorely in need of the advice.

Audio: UN: ClickClickBloom

[onekindsoul]

I just want you to know I read your store name as yowies.

Please be careful for scrapes and ouchies.

audio

[givehead]

(He switches to audio, speaking in a slow Texan drawl.)

That's basically the correct intended pronounciation. (You did great, Ruby, even if you completely missed it.)

Some of us like our sex with scrapes and ouchies, to be fair.

text; un: taka

[retsuden]

[ Normally Sasuke would pull a face and MOVE ON because this is SCANDALOUS clearly, but he's not just scrolling past. When he figures out later that this place is making him want to actually talk to people and that more importantly it's forcing him to be honest with some people too, he's going to burn something.

IN THE MEANTIME... God where to even start. He understood a lot of these words individually, but hardly any of it the way it's been strung together. ]

Why would a shop like yours sell furniture?

[ ... That's sure a starting place. ]

text

[givehead]

(Oh hell yeah. No one ever asked about the furniture. This is the moment Dirk has been waiting for his entire life.

Not really, but damn it's up there.)

Sex causes fatigue for some people and specially designed furniture can help maintain specific positions. It can also help focus more on pleasure rather than the practicality of posing.

Plus some of it is just plain fun.


And it is usually a lot easier to clean than typical furniture.

text | un: P.G.

[possessum]

( There are three things that allow Peter to actually be capable of replying to this: he's finally unCorrupted, there's a good bit of Darkblood influence making him kind of less of a nervous wreck at the moment, and of course: the poster's Paleblood helping coax Peter into actually being more honest and open.

Though underneath everything else is also just a simple, genuine curiosity. He's not used to talking about things like this, and in recent years, certainly never thought he could experience things like this. But, well... he's nineteen years old now, permanently living with his girlfriend, and there are absolutely things he's curious about at least learning more on. It could be kind of nice to ask someone who seems to be an expert on the matter, especially safely in secret.

Peter Graham puts on his reading glasses. This is serious. )

When you say "advice" does that mean like help with really basic stuff too?
Because I'm kind of extremely inexperienced

with everything

text

[givehead]

(Pity wasn't an emotion Dirk felt too often, but there were so many people coming out of the woodwork who just had no idea about anything that pity...It's a close feeling. Mostly he just wants to sigh at how bad sex education seems to be throughout the universe.

Thank God Dirk can be practical and professional about these things. All jokes aside, the dude wasn't the worst to talk about this shit with.

He's totally down to help people get laid. That's the hero he has always wanted to be.)

100%. Everyone has to start somewhere. Plus, I am a firm believer that mastering the fundamentals of anything is what makes a true master in a field. Skipping to the big shiny stuff will have you stumbling like an asshole later.

Nothing wrong with being a huge virgin. So, tell me what we're working with here. Have you made out? Gone to any of the respective bases?

Text - UN: Onerthes

[onerthes]

Pffft, well aren't you the industrious little soul.

[Probably fortunate she had totally missed his conversation with Minako, hah.]

Well, I won't be needing any advice, I assure you. I have more than enough experience for myself when it comes to that sort of thing. But, when you say 'toys' exactly how varied is the merchandise around here, really?

The people in Trench can be repressed at times.

[And at times, the exact opposite. Look, she was going to potentially want a couple supplies either way. Maybe. Ok, maybe that was wishful thinking, hah.]

text

[givehead]

I dunno about "little" but I do try.

Not varied whatsoever. But that's where I come into play. I just actually made someone a custom toy. With the right technology, anything is truly possible.

So I've noticed. I've also noticed people seem to be unusually eager to share those repressed feelings with me specifically.

(Granted, everything was privatized and confidential, but he doesn't feel too bad for admitting as much. He wasn't dropping names.)

In times of violence, people forget they are allowed to enjoy their personal lives.