Michael (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
eudaimonikos) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
deernet2022-01-07 07:37 pm
eudaimonikos) wrote in deernet2022-01-07 07:37 pm
un: eudaimonikos; video
[Well, this is Michael's username, for sure. He seems to be looking rather different, though. Still dressed the same despite it!]
Hey, this is Michael. Just curious - is this a thing that's happening now? Are we all doing this?
Don't get me wrong, it's not a huge deal. I honestly never liked all the weird dangly bits. Not sure about the hair... [He runs a hand through it, holding it briefly up against his head; does he want it short again, or is this good?] ...but I can cut that. Guess now I have to get used to everyone calling me "she", too...
[That one, he sounds mildly irritated by. It's not the word itself, necessarily, it just took him long enough to get used to answering to the first one. Why do humans have to change their language rules every two seconds? But, he's using their language and that's how it works. His usual body was the only reason he ended up being "he", so...well, he'll just have to manage.]
Except the locals, maybe. Why do they call everyone "they", anyway? What is that? [Seems rhetorical, though; he flaps his hands dismissively.] Well, anyway. If anyone else is suddenly changing size or shape, and your wardrobe isn't working anymore, let me know and I'll just run off some new clothes for you for free. Might as well make these things a little bit easier, right?
Hey, this is Michael. Just curious - is this a thing that's happening now? Are we all doing this?
Don't get me wrong, it's not a huge deal. I honestly never liked all the weird dangly bits. Not sure about the hair... [He runs a hand through it, holding it briefly up against his head; does he want it short again, or is this good?] ...but I can cut that. Guess now I have to get used to everyone calling me "she", too...
[That one, he sounds mildly irritated by. It's not the word itself, necessarily, it just took him long enough to get used to answering to the first one. Why do humans have to change their language rules every two seconds? But, he's using their language and that's how it works. His usual body was the only reason he ended up being "he", so...well, he'll just have to manage.]
Except the locals, maybe. Why do they call everyone "they", anyway? What is that? [Seems rhetorical, though; he flaps his hands dismissively.] Well, anyway. If anyone else is suddenly changing size or shape, and your wardrobe isn't working anymore, let me know and I'll just run off some new clothes for you for free. Might as well make these things a little bit easier, right?
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[it's okay, she knows she's a new fish in the pond and will have to earn trust]
Well...I'm from 3001 and a planet other than Terra, but if I remember right, pronouns became a lot more fluid in the 21st century. Besides, you're used to male pronouns, so I'll use those if that's all right with you?
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[Frankly Michael's not sure a normal hiring process really makes sense here - what's he gonna do, call her references? But he'd like to at least get to know her first.]
Huh. I mean, my closest human friends back home were from the 21st century. The very beginning of it, though. Maybe they died too early. [.....] But - uh, yeah, that's fine. I've been using those since I got a physical body at all, pretty much.
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[she's open to whatever. tea would be a preference. tea reminds her still of Alfred, but she knows he'd want his surrogate daughter to be happy]
Hmm. I'm not Terran, so I can't be completely sure, of course. But Mother was our planet's ambassador, she insisted I learn as much as I could about foreign planets. For Terra, that was from the smallest shift in social policy to the greater shift of the third world war. I have what was once called a photographic memory? But male or female body, you're used to those using male pronouns with you. So shall I.
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[Nights get boring, with most people off being unconscious! But Michael doesn't tend to keep the store open then, due to all the potential customers also being asleep, so really that shouldn't affect any employees.]
What planet are you from? [.....] Oh, yikes, are they due for another one of those wars?
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[she has an ill son and a potentially adulterous husband. home brings no thoughts of joy to her. but a job would, especially one in a field she's already knowledgeable of]
Bgztl. [it sounds like "Bg-zuh-tl" when said aloud] We share the same orbital and rotational path, of Terra, separated from each other by the Phantom Zone. But we're are our own planet, one largely ran by my foremothers. [she says with an embarrassed laugh]
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Oh, that's not there in my universe. I don't think we have intelligent life on any of the other planets, actually - not that I've gone to check myself, but I feel like someone would've noticed.
[Would aliens show up in the afterlife? Man, who knows. Michael's got enough going on with the humans.]
What's the Phantom Zone?
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Really? That's a shame. For where you live, at least, there are so many worlds out there with so many peoples, not all of them humanoid in the slightest.
[she's thinking mainly of the Durlans and the Vrygans. squid creatures and large bugs, but both gave her a teammate she loved like a brother]
It's a--it's sandwiched between Terra and Bgztl. When we phase, or become intangible, we skirt the edge of the Phantom Zone. And unfortunately, Terra has been using it as their prison for some time.
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Oh - oh! Well, we've got the afterlife! I wouldn't say it's restricted to any one location, but it's sort of another dimensional...layer, over top where Earth and all that are. Intangible as far as they're concerned. "Over top" is probably not really technically correct...
[.....wait hold up]
They can send people there and then bring them back afterwards? [like ARGUABLY the afterlife is sort of used as a punishment for humans, but "prison" is not really the word for that]
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A real, provable afterlife? I've never heard of such a thing! How remarkable! May I ask what it's like? And it sounds as though Terra is sandwiched in the middle.
Well. In theory. A great hero of Terra's twentieth century, Lar Gand, was stuck there because he'd been exposed to lead, fatal to people of his homeworld, then retrieved in the thirtieth century and cured. But for the most part, Terra sent criminals.
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[There's a lot going on in the afterlife!]
Exposed to lead...was he shot?
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[resists the urge to que up "Dead Man's Party"]
Honestly, I'm not sure. The whole thing happened between my death and my status as a ghost and he's not exactly talkative. He's been part of the team for years, but he likes solo exploration the best. And who can say no to Lar Gand?
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[Which doesn't signify much, since they're from different universes. Just, like, this name means nothing to him.]
Well, we definitely don't have ghosts. Our afterlife's...well, inescapable isn't exactly the word. [He's done that.] But everybody ends up there initially, at least. We're sort of in a period of flux right now, lots of social reform happening. I've taken over management of Heaven, and we've formed an inter-Place panel to review how everything functions.
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[that's her growing conviction. worship of the Mistress on Bgztl is one of the few religions to stand the test of time, but most others she's heard about were father gods and on their way out by the 29th century, Terran time]
How peculiar! Granted, mine didn't turn ghosts until I brought myself into being. [she listens carefully to the discussion of the afterlife] Even those from other planets? Like Durla or Vryga? But social reform...generally tends towards to the liberal, that's a disputed fact of morality even after Terran standards. But, by Place, what do you mean....?
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[But eh, one afterlife deity mostly seems like the next.]
We just get people from Earth. I'm not sure what would happen if sapient life evolved anywhere else. Other than a hell of a lot of paperwork! [He says, like a joke, even though it definitely is true.] There's the Good Place, and the Bad Place. Basically what it sounds like. The initial idea was to send humans who reached a certain "goodness" threshold to the Good Place, to be happy or whatever, and everyone else to the Bad Place for eternal torture.
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[maybe. but she'd far prefer eternal sleep in the Void over what Terrans have told her about Hell]
I suppose that makes sense. Every world is unique, every world has its own stories and gods and mythologies. And paperwork is the worst. [and she nods] That maps to what I've heard from Terrans. That good people go to someplace nice and bad people go someplace terrible. And that a person is capable of changing where they go, depending upon how they act.
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Anyway, it was ridiculous. The entry requirements were so high for the Good Place that essentially no one made it in - no one at all, for the past half-millennium. So I've been working on adjusting those, and reviewing all the past cases to figure out who can just come over right now, and we've outlawed the torture in favor of something more rehabilitative, which is also still in development. It's been pretty busy.
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Wait. You're joking. No one at all? For half of a millenium? That's...sweet Mistress, that's insane. I'm glad that you were tasked with adjusting things, though. And torture doesn't work, except to get the answer someone else was already looking for. Though, I can only imagine! The United Galaxies only needed the Legion on occasion and it still felt like we had no time to ourselves. You were likely needed all of the time.
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[Is it time for Michael to be a HUGE BITCH? Sounds like it is!]
No, I had to sue them so that they'd even consider adjusting things. I had to run a year-long proof of concept to show that humans could change - like they hadn't already - and then win a court case, and then when I did, the Judge was just like "oooh, our system does suck, guess we better just destroy humanity and start over with the next species of mortals." And of course the other demons were sabotaging everything the entire time...
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as far as she knows, at least]
They were going to destroy humanity? In which reality does that make it a suitable first option as opposed to the absolute worst case scenario? Even with demons trying to sabotage things?
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[The rant has burned itself out, but Michael's still visibly irritated.]
Most immortals don't think all that much of mortals.
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like it or not (and she doesn't), but she is her mother's daughter]
I suppose that's not much of a surprise. [after all, all the women did was live a couple hundred more years than Terrans and the Mistress knew that most Bgztlians had attitudes about that]
But, perhaps back to the previous topic? Interviewing to work at your store? I have...all the free time in the world, at present.
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[That'll give him plenty of time to prepare. He's not quite sure what he's going to prepare, but it seems like he ought to!]
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[and Mistress take it, she doesn't feel the cold, so she's going to wear as many cute dresses as she can]
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[Freedom of expression!]
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