entreats: (to where i have been waiting)
ange "the definition of chuunibyou" ushiromiya ([personal profile] entreats) wrote in [community profile] deernet2022-01-10 10:27 pm

video; un: ushiromiya

[ Even as the image can be seen, it seems like there's still a moment of set up, tiny hands fiddling with the Omni like they're trying to get the perfect shot.. But then there are two faces visible. Two faces that are looking decidedly younger than usually - it's Ange and Ruby, looking like they definitely can't be much older than six years old.

And looking very excited. ]


Um, so, so..! We heard that there's some sort of reaaally scary snake monster out there! So.. we thought we'd help out everyone and get rid of it! Because Ruby.. She's a really, reaaally cool huntress! [ Ange may be Will-Smith-esque posing at Ruby for emphasis right as she says that. ]

[Ruby just stares at the camera briefly until she notices Ange's hands pointing her way. She blinks and quickly starts to flex her twiggy arms to the camera.]

Yeah! We're super strong and awesome and we've got tons of weapons! [Ruby gestures to a sack of potato's and a large collection of sticks that they've gathered up.]

That snack is going to be- a- -uh- a, a piece of snack!

[ While Ruby is saying that last part, it seems that Ange has already moved over to grab one of the sticks for a demonstration. As she's running back towards where Ruby and the Omni are, she's waving the stick wildly. ]

We'll get it just like thi--

[ Ange manages to smack the stick right against the device, turning the view sideways before it just cuts out entirely.

Oops. ]
payingfordeliverance: (Bleh: Why this)

[personal profile] payingfordeliverance 2022-01-21 11:42 pm (UTC)(link)
[Ange has just enough time to see Break make a face as though he has just stepped in something deeply unfortunate (ha). Then, Baltus closes his mouth by accident, and the connection goes dark and then cuts off entirely.

Break calls back a few minutes later.]


Ehhhhhh, sorry about that. My omen swallowed my omni. Sorry, sorry.

[This caused some consternation until Break remembered he could just summon the stupid thing. Baltus can be heard making horrible cackles of doggie mirth in the background.]
happymeal: (both of us were walking)

[personal profile] happymeal 2022-01-23 09:28 am (UTC)(link)
[ It's only been a few minutes.

And yet. And yet, when the connection is back, Break will find a child absolutely in tears. Like he didn't just disappear for a few moments at best, but instead for a few years or something. Baltus, how dare you cause this. ]


U-Uncle Breaaak! [ She sniffs, Ange's eyes watery during the moments where they are actually visible on the image, rather than hidden behind tiny fists that rub at her eyes. ] I thought you were gone forever..!

[ Welcome to six year old moodswings over the smallest and dumbest things.

And maybe Ange having a bit of an abandonment complex that's even way more dramatic the younger she is. ]
payingfordeliverance: (Surprise: WHAT in the butt?)

[personal profile] payingfordeliverance 2022-01-25 09:35 am (UTC)(link)
[...this is not at all the ideal way to squirrel out of the question of when exactly he plans to smooch Qrow.]

Ah -- hey, hey, none of that, yeah? It takes more than a blip of the omni to be rid of me.

[Baltus's snickering has cut off; inwardly, Break himself is panicking, as he always does when confronted by a crying child. And it's been so, so long since he dealt with a child this age, old enough to have serious problems and young enough that they follow her logic and hers alone. This could simply be a matter of object permanence -- he remembers the youngest Sinclair daughter's unshakeable belief for some time that if she covered her own eyes, no one could see her. Following that reasoning, of course Break vanishes in a puff of smoke if the connection through the omni is cut off.

That's an awfully big panic reaction for something so simple, though. Isn't it...?]


I'm ready to g -- to come to you now, alright? If you'll give me a moment, I'll pop through this lamp to the one in Gaze and be there lickety-split.

[Whereupon possibly Ruby will take a stick to his shins for making Ange cry, and he will deserve it.]
happymeal: (i wonder why it's not coming back)

[personal profile] happymeal 2022-01-26 10:46 pm (UTC)(link)
[ Ange sniffs again, her hands still away from her face so she's actually visible as she's looking at the image. ]

Really?

[ Apparently she needs just the tiniest bit more of reassurance, though she does believes Break's words when he's saying them like that, apparently. ]

You'll really be here in just a moment..? [ Sorry, Break, that you have these Teary Sad Eyes Of Terror still staring at you so intensely. ]
payingfordeliverance: (Smile: Once upon a better time)

[personal profile] payingfordeliverance 2022-01-27 04:28 am (UTC)(link)
Yes, just so. Do you know where the School of Mutter is? That's the direction I'll be coming from.

[He manages to summon up a tentative smile for her, hoping this will be enough. His usual tactic for handling crying children past his own internal screaming is to pat them on the head and produce candy from the seemingly magical amount of pockets in his sleeves and jacket, but of course that won't work through the blasted omni. Come to think of it, will the connection warp again if he tries to keep it open while he goes through the lamp? He's never tried such a thing and now will be a terrible time to find out.]

Shall I send Baltus ahead, to keep you company? [The snoot begins to edge its way into the frame. Baltus, much like Break, always perks up when there is a job to be done.] I don't think you've ever gotten to see just how fast he can run, right?
happymeal: (even though i can see it)

[personal profile] happymeal 2022-01-27 10:33 pm (UTC)(link)
[ The little girl slowly shakes her head. Not in response to the first question, but to the second one. It's true, even within the blurry haze of regular Ange memories that have somehow been transfered to a six-year-old's conscious, she doesn't recall ever having seen him run.

But one thing is clear here to Ange: ]


Uh-huh, can he come keep me company until you're here, uncle Break..?

[ It's not like Ange doesn't have Ruby here as company. She's probably audible somewhere off-screen, rapidly talking to someone else, trying to convince them that toddler monster fighting is the best idea.

But she might be feeling a little bit vulnerable after that scare, so she could use the extra company. ]


I wanna pet him.

[ This is clearly important. ]
payingfordeliverance: (Smile: I might accidentally kill you)

[personal profile] payingfordeliverance 2022-01-28 12:51 pm (UTC)(link)
You hear that, Baltus? You've got an important job to do.

[Baltus boofs about and makes other various dog noises of enthusiastic acknowledgement. The omen is genuinely pleased to get to participate, and offscreen, begins trotting back and forth in the foyer; he's restless to go. Meanwhile, Break grabs his favorite long coat from the hall closet and slides just one arm into it, flapping it around to get the shoulder up where it ought to go with just one hand.]

Then, I'm on my way. I'm going to hang up for the moment so I can hop through the lamp, alright? But you'll see me for real just after.

[Hopefully delivering a warning will alleviate the threat of further panic.]
happymeal: (like i'm circling empty air)

[personal profile] happymeal 2022-01-30 09:24 am (UTC)(link)
[ The warning does seem to help - in the sense that Ange, at the very least, isn't immediately panicking when he says that. She nods in acknowledgement of the fact that he'll disappear for a bit, but then arrive in person a few moments later..

.. though she still nervously shifts a little while sitting there. Nothing too big, but it's still that inward nervousness being made visible because Ange's just young enough to be unable to ever fully hide her emotions. ]


Okay.. See you in a little bit. I'll be waiting.. [ Almost like it's a reminder. Please don't make that an empty promise, Break!! Remember that she's waiting..!! ]
payingfordeliverance: (Fighting: Fweeee)

[personal profile] payingfordeliverance 2022-01-31 09:19 am (UTC)(link)
Yes! Just in a moment, Miss Ange.

[He's through the lamp already the instant he hangs up, and emerges into the School of Mutter cramming the omni into his pocket and already aimed towards the entrance. Baltus promptly takes off like a shot, shadowing himself intangible so he can run straight and true without worrying about knocking anyone over. Even so, people scatter hurriedly when they see him coming, moving on instinct. The vast majority of the time, Baltus resembles at best a pile of noodles stuck into a wad of clay with no spine in it, which suits his purposes just fine. But just as Break's often deliberately silly exterior masks the deadly quick swordsman underneath, the breed of dog that Baltus has manifested as is a breed that is meant for hunting wolves, and when he runs at full speed, he eats up the distance between the school and the big green mansion with an elegance that would appear preternatural even if it weren't for the glowing white eyes.

Baltus is entirely capable of turning on a dime. Instead, conscious of Ange's current state as a small and recently upset child, the omen deliberately sends himself ass over teakettle into a comical noodley somersault when he arrives, bouncing up quickly and giving himself a cheerful shake before he trots over. He's bigger than Ange now, and he approaches her with his head low and his tail high and swishing, ears perked up and friendly.

With his omen serving as a distraction Break could easily think of that as good enough and take the same route in a quick but reasonable clip. Indeed, as he winds his way through the crowd and out of the school, something he'd genuinely forgotten for a moment there finally crosses his mind again: Ange isn't usually six years old. She isn't really a child. This is some sort of Trench nonsense and she'll be back to normal sooner or later, and after all this embarrassment, it truly will be a shock if this girl can stand to speak to him ever again. When he thinks of that older Ange as he knows her, the kindest thing to do is probably not to make a big deal out of any of this, to simply tolerate the situation until it resolves itself and then let everybody move on.

He can't do it.

No matter how things turn out later and no matter what Ange thinks of it then, in this moment she is a child, and just a few moments ago she was crying at him. She was crying at him because to her, he was gone, and I thought you were gone forever runs right up into another little girl's voice that still cries out if you leave, I'll be all alone in the depths of his heart on rough nights. Having turned his back on a child who needed him exactly one time, Break simply can't bear to be casual about such things ever again, and the one currently waiting for him on the steps of her front porch needs to know that if she asks him to come quickly, he'll do it.

Emerging from the entrance to the school, Break hops up onto the railing and surfs on down it instead of bothering with all the stairs that lead up to it. Once he hits the street, heaven help him, he runs.]
Edited 2022-01-31 09:22 (UTC)
happymeal: (the sound of your heartbeat is far away)

[personal profile] happymeal 2022-01-31 10:36 pm (UTC)(link)
[ Thankfully Break had the right idea here.

Because Ange might have been a little worried if she had to wait for just him. After all, even if this younger Ange might not consciously realise it in any way, that antsy feeling she gets when someone tells her they'll be right back does have a source - taken straight from the one time people told her that and then didn't ever come back.

Without realising it, and without having that memory within her the way the older Ange does, this younger Ange is just left with the antsiness without realising why, or where it's coming from.

But the momentary cure for it in this instance comes from Break's plan. Because the moment Baltus shows up like some sort of rolling noodle of a clown dog, Ange is running right towards the dog, almost like she's reuniting with a friend she hasn't seen in ten years.

She opens her arms wide, and then tries to hug the omen as well as she can. It's a little awkward, considering Baltus is bigger than she is, but she's trying to do her best to wrap her tiny kid arms around him all the same, clinging to him like she's trying to make sure he's real, that he's truly there.

It's that way that Break will find her once he does arrive at the mansion. Ange fiercely clinging to Baltus, hugging him--

But at least not seeming sad in any way. At least she has some company. At least she has Baltus here, like some sort of symbol of Break's promise to show up too. (In fact, she may be so busy hugging the dog that she won't even immediately realise it once the man does show up.) ]
payingfordeliverance: https://www.etsy.com/listing/805326361/threnody-8x8-fine-art-print-borzoi-dog (Baltus: Pointy)

[personal profile] payingfordeliverance 2022-02-02 12:34 pm (UTC)(link)
[Oh. Yes. This is quite fine. Baltus's most important duty is as an emotional support omen, and the reason he stays so tangible when he could easily go wafting around like a proper ghost dog is that Break needs a living creature to touch sometimes, too -- it helps him to ground himself when his sight is gone or he's suffering from nightmares or other nasty thoughts, and prone to forgetting just where he is. It is the easiest thing in the world now to plonk his bum down right there on the street and drape his long neck over Ange's shoulder, doggishly returning the embrace. His tail thumps audibly against the pavement. He is happy to help.

Break himself is a little relieved when he skids around the corner up the street and spots them like that. He'd suspected Baltus would be of great help here. His omen already wanders the house at night to keep an eye on the kids as Break rests, and has a tendency to lean up on people who seem upset in his presence. Still, the other piece of the puzzle there is for Ange to be receptive to the comfort, and it does seem that Baltus has genuinely helped.

Interesting that she's so willing to cuddle the omen outright when she's so prickly when she's older. Well, maybe that's just kids for you.

Baltus lets out a bark of welcome as Break approaches. It is but a small bark. It would not do to bark sharply enough to startle Ange.]
happymeal: (the blue cloudy sky)

[personal profile] happymeal 2022-02-03 10:28 pm (UTC)(link)
[ Though the young Ange is perfectly content just staying like this and cuddling the noodle omen, the bark does seem to alert her that something is happening. It doesn't startle her, since she doesn't think it's anything dangerous if Baltus would bark so relatively quietly, but he still must have seen something to make that noise.

So she slowly pulls her head away enough from the fur to actually look around them, and that's the moment she realises that it's not just Baltus who has arrived. It seems that the man the omen belongs to has finally followed, and apparently that is the one thing that can get Ange to relinquish her hold on the omen, instead running over in Break's direction with her arms already spread, open wide.

That can only mean one thing, right. ]


Uncle Break..!

[ She runs into the man with a force that'd be strong enough to knock someone over, were Ange not a tiny six year old little kid who couldn't even topple an empty chair if she tried. Still, she latches onto the man the first chance she gets, no matter whether it's for a proper hug or just her clinging to his legs, in case he wasn't prepared to receive this level of sudden and immediate physical contact. ]

You really came! You kept your promise..!
payingfordeliverance: (Sharon: Take my hand)

[personal profile] payingfordeliverance 2022-02-04 01:51 am (UTC)(link)
[Oh, hell, no. By the time Break had settled into himself well enough to love it when Sharon ran for him, she'd grown out of the urge. No more making eyes at him until he gave in to piggyback rides, no more clinging to his hands and dragging him around. The beginning of her transition from child to fine lady had depressed him in ways he hadn't understood at the time, and he's not wasting the chance to indulge again. When Ange runs to him, she is not just hugged but scooped up into his arms with practiced ease, and he won't even complain if he's scolded for being embarrassing later.

Even though her surprise that he actually showed up devastates him. That shouldn't be a shock unless she's accustomed to promises being broken, and she's just so young.]


Now. You listen to me, Miss Ange, because this is terribly important. I am someone who doesn't make a promise at all if I don't believe I'll be able to keep it. If ever I tell you I'm on my way to your side, know that I'll be fighting my hardest to get there, alright?

[That it's Ange he's speaking to isn't actually the most important part of this. Rather, this is just who Break is, and it's important to him that this is known. He never says things like "I'll always be there for you" or other such vague and hollow sentiments, because that's the sort of thing he can't promise. For all he knows tomorrow the ocean will call him back and this will be the last memory Ange has of him. But something like "I am always trying" or "I want to be at your side"...that he can promise honestly.

The last promise he couldn't keep on his own was granting Alice's wish. Dying before he could get there, Break used the last of his strength to rip a hole between dimensions and pull Oz and the others through, and sent them in his stead. That's the sort of force it takes to stop Xerxes Break.]
Edited 2022-02-04 01:54 (UTC)
happymeal: (even though i can see it)

[personal profile] happymeal 2022-02-04 10:30 pm (UTC)(link)
.. I know that.

[ Maybe it says something about Ange's opinion of him - though it's hard to tell if she's saying this because of her youthful innocence in this form, or if it's a belief about him that even the older Ange holds. A certain trust in the man. ]

Uncle Break.. would do his best. [ (Sorry for all the 'uncle'-ing, by the way. Ange is at exactly that age where talking in the third person is all the hype.

She will very much regret this later.) ]


But.. [ Ange pauses. And despite the fact that she is very, very content in this current hug, having gratefully allowed herself to be scooped up, she now pauses. ] .. sometimes trying your best isn't enough, right..?

[ Something about her tone seems to indicate that the statement comes from experience.

Even if it's an experience that this Ange doesn't fully remember. Only the imprint its aftermath has left within her, without the actual memories attached to it. ]
payingfordeliverance: (Pensive: Tender)

[personal profile] payingfordeliverance 2022-02-07 05:39 pm (UTC)(link)
[This child, though. Was she always like this? Or, given that she can be this age and still know him, are things more mixed up in her head than it seems at first glance...?]

...mm. Miss Ange is wise, though that's a sad sort of thing to understand so young.

[Break has no problem parroting her third person speech right back at her. He often uses it himself, deferentially. Handing down his cane to Baltus, who is not so un-doggy that he does not love to carry large sticks, he settles Ange in on his hip and aims for the back yard.]

That's why it's so important that people know and understand...just how far you'll go on their behalf. Then, if ever you fail to keep a promise, your precious people will be able to say to themselves -- "he couldn't," instead of, "he didn't". The latter is very different, you know...?
happymeal: (i wonder why it's not coming back)

[personal profile] happymeal 2022-02-08 10:36 pm (UTC)(link)
[ Ange will gladly be taken along this way. The girl seems to provide absolutely no resistance - though that might also be since she seems to, instead, be deep in thought about what the man is telling her here. She's frowning in thought and all.

But when she seems to reach some sort of mental conclusion, Ange does nod. Right. It does matter whether people put in effort or not, even she can grasp that at this age. ]


But..

[ It seems something is still bothering her though, since the frown doesn't leave her face. ]

.. It still hurts. [ Even though it'd be better, comparatively speaking. ] When the people you like aren't there, it makes your heart feel..

[ Her voice momentarily trails off, like she's thinking of the right words. It's all hard to put into words for someone so young, especially when the older Ange's feelings are all mixed in, way too complicated for a brain still so small. ]

It makes your heart feel all empty.
Edited 2022-02-08 22:37 (UTC)
payingfordeliverance: (Pensive: Observing)

[personal profile] payingfordeliverance 2022-02-09 07:33 am (UTC)(link)
Lonely. That's the word you're looking for, I think. Even when you aren't alone at all, and even if there are things right in front of you that make you really happy...if there are people you like who are missing, it is still possible to be lonely.

[That's how it is for him, anyway. Break's own loneliness is something that permeates him in a way he's never going to be able to shake, and that's just how it is. Time eases things, but there's not a day that goes by that he doesn't think one of his closest knight friends at Sinclair would be almost reverent about this particular whiskey, or look at his favorite teacup and note that it's close to the pattern Shelly loved best but not quite right. He can sit in a group of people and laugh and enjoy himself and it will be completely genuine, and he will still wish Sharon was at his side to enjoy things, too.

It's in his bones, at this point.]
Edited 2022-02-09 07:35 (UTC)
happymeal: (even though i can see it)

[personal profile] happymeal 2022-02-10 07:47 am (UTC)(link)
Lonely..

[ Ange repeats the word as if she's trying it out, trying to see if it's a fit for the odd feelings she's feeling in her heart right now. Break's explanation does help though, since Ange technically thinks she couldn't be lonely, not with all these people who care about her right here.

And yet.. there's still something that stings. Is that loneliness..? ]


I don't like it. [ Apparently she's decided as much. It sounds a little pouty, but not strong or sharp in any way. Like Ange is more scared of the feeling than she is annoyed about it. ] I don't.. want to feel lonely. It doesn't feel nice.
payingfordeliverance: (Smile: Once upon a time)

[personal profile] payingfordeliverance 2022-02-12 06:50 pm (UTC)(link)
It really doesn't.

[They reach the backyard where Ruby is...doing something loud and Rubyish, no doubt. Baltus trots off to mess with her. Break pauses, but won't put Ange down until she indicates she's ready.]

Mm, but -- shall I tell you a secret I know about it? It's the sort of thing you find out when you get really ancient, like me.
happymeal: (i remember it but i can't see it)

[personal profile] happymeal 2022-02-13 10:33 pm (UTC)(link)
[ Apparently Ange doesn't care much yet about the idea of being let down, since the tiny girl still seems to cling to Break with the force of a mountain climber trying to keep themselves from falling off Mount Everest.

Or maybe it's since she's particularly interested in what the man is saying right now, staring at him with big, curious eyes. ]


A secret?

[ It's like she's perking up at the very mention of one. ]

Of course! I'm really good at keeping secrets..! I'll keep it just between us two! [ Just so it won't spread to any other non-ancient people. It's clearly too important.

(It sounds like a stupidly solemn promise too, too solemn for the situation, but that's just how kids function. Ange is no exception.) ]
payingfordeliverance: (Smile: All these things I stand to lose)

[personal profile] payingfordeliverance 2022-02-15 07:51 pm (UTC)(link)
[Truly, other non-ancient people who are not so wise as Miss Ange should not be exposed to such deep truths as all this.]

Then, the secret is...I'm someone who is lonely, too.

[It is safe to tell Ange this because out of all the kids he knows, she is the least likely to be weird about it when she is grown up again. Break hasn't necessarily caught on to the subtle ways that his own have been working to support him, but he does know that if his own pains were more obvious they'd be much more aggressive in turn, and it would be inconvenient at best and gross at worst. Ange strikes him as much more the type who would find out such a thing, nod at him in solemn understanding, and manage to find a way to keep him company that would still let him have space and peace and quiet. This is vastly preferable to noise and chaos and being smothered in love, some days.]

Because I've lived with it so long, I know that -- it's like getting a nasty cut. Of course when it first happens, it stings and bleeds and it's awful, and perhaps you might cry about it. And, if you're not careful, you can hurt yourself all over again. No matter how you look at it, it's really not fun, you know?

...however, given time and patience and some love...it will heal. It may become a scar that you always carry, and if it was a big cut, it might still ache sometimes. Especially when it rains, or is really cold out. But it won't always hurt and sting and bleed. Not if you take care of it properly.

That's what loneliness is really like. You could say that -- it's a feeling that can grow up, right along with us.
happymeal: (even though i can see it)

[personal profile] happymeal 2022-02-16 10:23 pm (UTC)(link)
[ Usually Ange would have said she doesn't like the sound of that.

Especially now, in this state. Ange is young enough that complicated emotions like that can be classified in really simple ways. Young enough that the world can still be divided into nothing more than things she likes, and things she doesn't like - and the idea of Break being sad, or hurting even just a little bit, falls squarely into the second category. But it does feel like there's something more about this, something that keeps the girl quiet for another few moments. Just staring at Break, and seeming to think about those words.

It's a secret he's sharing with her, after all. That means it's got to be important. And it's got to be something that Break doesn't tell everyone. The true weight of that won't hit Ange until she's back to normal, but even in this younger state, some of it seems to get through to her. ]


.. you can come hang out with me, uncle Break. [ The girl says it slowly, and a little softly - or at least, not with the usual amount of Small Child Exuberance. It sounds more serious than that, though with still an innocent angle to it all. ] When it rains. Or when it's really cold out. We can wear raincoats.

[ (Okay, maybe there's still some Small Child Logic involved.) ]

Maybe then we'll both not have to be as lonely. Or it'll hurt a little less.
payingfordeliverance: (Smile: It's not up to you)

[personal profile] payingfordeliverance 2022-02-17 06:06 pm (UTC)(link)
[He'd been prepared for her to Frown At Him over the whole concept, honestly. Child or otherwise, who enjoys expressing a distaste for something only to be told, even gently, that they're stuck with it? That she's reaching out to him in solidarity instead is something he'll remember going forward, once she's back to her usual age and letting out her angry kitten screeches at him over his various transgressions.

For the moment, he just stands here enjoying the warm feelings oozing out of his poor bedraggled heart, since he can get away with doing that right in front of her for once.]


Yes. I'd like that.

[It's the sort of thing he meant when he included love among the things you soothe loneliness with, after all. Arguably one of the most important things he learned about himself at Rainsworth was just how fiercely both emotions can exist in him at the same time.]