text; un: mako

[arclightning]

Hey, Trench. Mako here.

Couple things as we head into the new month. First, Ruby and I have the safehouses pretty much cleaned out of snow and ice, but I'm looking for people to help chop wood so they're stocked up and other people to routinely check up on them, make sure they're monster-free and still safe. Remember to keep an eye out for weather changes. Things get weird around this time, that's pretty clear.

Second, I have a question. You don't have to answer.

[ Is he stalling? Absolutely. ]

I'm interested in mourning traditions. What kinds of things do you do to honor someone who's dead? What are your cemeteries like, if they exist? Do you have a way to feel connected to people who aren't here anymore? What is it? Does it help?

Thanks. Stay warm.

Comments

text; un: doublehedgedsword

[laminae]

dog are you ok

[Look, after everything that went down with Varian, and his discussion with Wu about Mako's condition that far too closely resembled his boyfriend's before he went full beasthood, Fern has to poke and prod a little. He is worried. He is very worried, and he doesn't want Wu or Mako going through what they went through.]

uh back home my brother and i had graves for mom and dad that we'd visit sometimes
they weren't buried in any of the cemeteries in Ooo just out back
not like a lot of the dead people around were buried in those kinds of places anyways

[There were a looooot of skeletons strewn casually throughout the island.]

it was okay i guess but i mostly just think about them a lot
different stuff about them too like how mom used a crossbow or what their hugs were like
it helps me not forget them since they've been gone for so long

[arclightning]

Fine. I know that sounded ominous. I'm really just curious. Something I'm working on.

[ Just casually absolutely misinterpreting that, even as he takes notes. ]

The thinking is what helps you? Do you miss being able to actually visit their graves?

Text; un: lothrat

[ezra_of_lothal]

I've been crashing at the safehouses on and off. I'll definitely do some wood chopping and patrols to help 'earn' my keep. Let me know if there's any other chores I could help with on that front.

As for your question - cremation and lighting memorial candles are pretty common where I'm from. What to do with ashes varies.

I just talk to people I miss like they're still here, sometimes. Tell them about important things going on, or sometimes just about my day. I'm lucky enough to have pictures of a lot of my family, so I pull them up when I do it.

[arclightning]

[ Oh, that's nice. They're actually getting used for their purpose. Mako and Ruby hadn't quite meant them for that, but... that would make Ruby happy, he thinks, knowing they're providing shelter to somebody in this place. ]

If they're dirty, go ahead and sweep or something, but otherwise that's plenty. We do rounds to make sure they're being taken care of already. How are the supplies holding up? Is there enough food in the ones you're using?

[ He's just... taking notes about that, too. ]

Do people ever visit those memorials once they're made? I know that's not an option here, but.

un: yuuki, private

[siriusly]

Is an anniversary coming up?

[of, say, some parents?]

private 4evs

[arclightning]

Not soon, but.

I was actually thinking about you when I asked this. About wanting to contact people from home. I don't know if there's a way to do it, but I figure maybe we can set something up to let people at least, I don't know. Feel like they're talking to the people that aren't here. Thought I'd see what kinds of things people would use and if they'd even want that, otherwise it's a waste of resources.

text; un: bad.apple

[laniidae]

You're lucky to get a grave, where I come from. Many don't, either from falling in battle or being torn apart by some creature or worse.

[Which inadvertently leaves her wondering what happened to her, back home. It's not a great thought. Definitely not one she feels like lingering on.]

So, more often than not, people remember through the use of some sort of shrine. Displaying some trinket of the person's, like a memorial. Things that might've survived them.

[arclightning]

[ Mako gets that, enough that he swallows around a burst of something, looks away at the curled-up form of his Omen for a second. ]

Same here. Important people get graves. Important Earth Kingdom people get graves, actually.

Do you think a shrine like that actually helps the people left behind?

Text UN: RadRidingHood

[onekindsoul]

Thanks for throwing this out there, Mako.
We're a good team but it's always nice to have a few more hands around.
Didn't think we'd be running around so much with the multiple locations.

...And I know it must be tough to ask the second thing. We've already talked about that a little.

Was it our talk that got you thinking about that?

[arclightning]

People are so desperate to help and feel useful in this city. Might as well give them a useful outlet.

But yeah. It was. I was thinking about it a lot, actually. Wondering if turning one of the safehouses into some kind of memorial thing would be smart, or pointless.

un: trienemybest; text

[droptheious]

That's not a concerning question at all.

[He thinks about the grave in the yard of his home here- where the Waste of his father is buried, glad Mako can't see the change in his expression because of it.]

He have graves, usually. Headstones. Where you can take flowers and just...talk to them, I guess? Like they're still there.

[arclightning]

There's a reason for it and it's not a bad one.

You holding up okay?

I'm getting a lot of that. Symbols or resting places being important. What do you think you'd do if you didn't have any of that stuff?

text | un: lyreplayer | wow sorry for this textwall

[themuseabandonsyou]

That's a big question. I guess the best place to start is - usually we cremate bodies, where I come from, and place the ashes in special urns, which are gathered in mausoleums. Some families have their own mausoleums, but most people go to one that's for the whole town, or one part of the city. A lot of the time, the urns or the walls near where they're placed will be decorated with images of the dead holding hands with their surviving loved ones, to remind them of their connection. Sometimes people like to leave gifts, too. Things like jewelry, or little carved statues, or things like that, placed around the urn.

As for honoring the dead, though, it varies a little? But the funerals I've been to take a couple days.

The first day the dead prepared for viewing, so people can say their goodbyes. Traditionally it has to be the women of their family that do this, but other women can do it, and if there's not enough women around it's technically okay for men to help too. But they wash and anoint the body with special oils and dress it for the funeral, placing coins over their eyes or on their lips to pay their passage into the Underworld.

Then on the second day the viewing is lead by the chief mourner, who's usually the dead's mother or wife or one of their sisters. We sing dirges, and speak about the dead's virtues in life, and then at the end of the day the body is carried to the funeral pyre.

The third day, offerings are made to the dead. The chief mourner cuts off a lock of her hair and puts it in their hands, and we pour wine or milk on the earth, then say a prayer and leave dried fruit or bread around the pyre. When it's done burning, the ashes are gathered and placed in the urn, and if the family can afford it there's usually a feast in their honor.

I think it helps, knowing that you're sending them off to the Underworld with what gifts you can give them, and being able to tell stories about them with other people they knew. Someone told me once that grief is just love that doesn't have anywhere left to go, and I think sharing in that with others, or leaving gifts to let them know they aren't forgotten, helps make it feel like it's not just trapped inside of you.

[arclightning]

Thanks for the details. That's exactly the kind of thing I'm looking for. Sounds pretty involved. And expensive, but Fire Nation rites are something similar, I think. We never actually got to do any of them.

Once they're gone. The people you're mourning. What would you do to stay connected like that with them? Would you want to?

text; un: clearthestreet

[laruetheday]

back home, we sewed funeral shrouds for our friends or siblings. we'd gather and say people could say whatever they wanted to say. then we'd use a torch to burn the shroud.

you have to make sure the dead person has a few coins on them, though, so they can pay to cross the river styx into the underworld.

[arclightning]

Like a release. I get it. Fire Nation stuff is similar. Lots of fire, obviously.

What do the living do after all of that to remember them?

text; un: taka. i hate you for this post.

[retsuden]

If you aren't considered an enemy of the village, you get to be buried in the Konoha cemetery. There are given markers or small headstones with the name and dates, and people will visit them from time to time to talk to those that they loved and leave flowers. When large groups die all at once, they are usually given a mass grave and one headstone, though this is rare. If you're an enemy of the village, your body is destroyed and you don't get any marker.

If you die in battle and your body is otherwise unrecoverable, your name gets added to the Memorial Stone. Some people will build their own memorial sites in private places to have their own space to remember those who couldn't get a gravestone for whatever reason.

Everyone is connected to those who pass on by our chakra. A middle land exists where your soul can reside and meet the chakra energy from those who have moved on to the other side, but the only means of gaining access to the middle land is to have a near death experience, so few have every done so. The Pure Land is where all souls ultimately go when they die. I suppose it helps many to know of the existence of these places, but not everyone finds comfort in it.

[ Aka him. He was not comforted by this at all. ]

[arclightning]

I can see why not.

I think I'd rather just believe the dead go to the Spirit World for a bit and then stop existing. At home, only one person gets reincarnated. All the other souls just go to the Spirit World and then move on, unless they really can't. Then they end up in Fog of Lost Souls trying to air their grievances for the rest of time.

Sounds like a lot of death where you come from.

un: eudaimonikos; text

[eudaimonikos]

I can help check up on a safehouse!
Or chop wood, whatever.
I'm gonna have extra time once the show's over

[Absolutely no comment on the rest of that; what does an immortal know about mourning practices?]

[arclightning]

Everyone's gonna have extra time when the show's over. Can't tell you how much I'm looking forward to it.

[ Hi Michael it's your friendly neighborhood boyfriend-who-got-roped-into-stage manager, and he is so.... so tired. So tired of sparkles and singing. Save him. ]

text | un: zhongli

[brokebitchmountain]

As a funeral parlor consultant back home, there are many ways and methods for mourning those who are no longer with us.

One such tradition is known as the Rite of Parting - though this is held for Gods and adepti alike the way in which it is performed is simple enough. Depending on the god or adeptus in question certain tools and offerings must be made in order to achieve a proper and appropriate ceremony.

[arclightning]

[ Somehow Mako didn't expect to get a perspective from the person with arguably the most useful perspective. He's taking copious notes for this one. ]

What makes a proper and appropriate ceremony? What's that designed to do, and what happens when it's not appropriate?

text; un: dragonofthewest

[truehumili_tea]

I'm not sure how much help an old man can be with splitting wood, but I would be glad to offer what assistance I can. Perhaps carrying it in for you or stacking it?

As for traditions, that is a very private matter for many. And one that varies widely across any land. I have seen many different ways in which different people pay respect to those who have passed on. But if you wish, I can tell you mine.

[arclightning]

[ Mako knows that username.

Mako knows what that username means, and he knows who is attached to that username, and he knows that he ran into him on the boardwalk a few months back, and everything in him goes stiff with respect at once. He looks wide-eyed at the little dragon next to him, silently asking her what to do. She huffs at him, no help at all.

Mako spends about fifteen minutes drafting and re-drafting his response, trying to make it sound effortless and not at all like he did that. ]

If you want something to do with your hands then the help is appreciated, but plenty of people have volunteered.

[ Iroh, he thinks, has earned a chance to rest, but Mako isn't going to patronize him by suggesting that. Let the man help. Spirits know that Mako needs the chance, too. ]

I'd be honored to hear your traditions, sir. There's not a lot I know about how people in the Fire Nation honor the dead.

I've always wanted to know.

text; un: shiro

[shiro2hero]

I'll help with the houses - always. Just point me in the right direction.

But

Can I ask why you're asking about mourning? Things are all right, aren't they?

[arclightning]

Things are alright.

[ Not fine, very pointedly not that, after the solstice. Mako hesitates over this next part for... a while. ]

I could use some help clearing out the house on the edge of the woods, if you're around.

text; UN: GoldenFlowers

[the_obedient_servant]

In the civilization that took me in, the people didn't leave corpses to bury or cremate, but rather, they turned into dust upon death.

The way they said goodbye when someone 'fell down' (their word for dying) was to gather up their dust and to put it on an object that held great sentimental value to them.

I can't say whether it helped or not. I don't think anything necessarily helps grief.

[arclightning]

I don't think that's true.

Unless you're being literal about the word 'helps'. Time does something, at least.

[ He thinks. Mako has put time and distance between himself and the grief he carries around, packaged it up in a neat little bundle and shoved it down inside himself, and called that moving on.

He's never unwrapped it. Who knows what he would find. ]

That tradition didn't help you?

private text; un: ushiromiya

[entreats]

[ There's a lot Ange could say here.

But maybe it's easier to not waste words, and instead only send: ]

Do you want me to show you in person?

[ Ange figures she doesn't have to elaborate. She showed Mako his world before, after all. Compared to that, conjuring up the image of the cemetary she usually visited in her own world shouldn't be so hard at all. And it would describe things better than words could, probably.

Talk about his reasons can wait for later. ]

private 4ever

[arclightning]

[ Mako is so glad for the solid constancy of Ange.

He is also glad she's back to her normal self. Presumably. ]

I'm not gonna have to babysit you and Ruby if I do, right?

Yeah. I do.

text | carcinoGeneticist

[klawful]

WE JUST LET NATURE TAKE ITS COURSE. LEAVE THE BODIES TO ROT WHERE THEY FELL. TROLLS ARE NOT PARTICULARLY SENTIMENTAL ABOUT DEATH. THOUGH SOMETIMES IT IS SAD AND WE MAY SHED A FEW TEARS.

SOME OF US MIGHT CHOOSE TO "HONOR" DEATH BY GETTING REVENGE AND MURDERING THE *FUCK* OUT OF WHATEVER KILLED THE POOR BASTARD, BUT LIKE, SOME OF US ARE MORE COMPETENT AT EMOTIONAL HEALING THAN *SOME* LOSERS.

[arclightning]

[ The thing is.

As much as Mako wants to gather info, as much as he's thinking about this sentimental thing he has no idea how to go about making.

He actually has no idea how to talk to people about these deep topics, and he is increasingly running into moments where he just stares down at his Omni and exchanges a look with Zuko, who is equally baffled. ]

So you just don't do anything at all. How are you getting that emotional healing, then?

text; un: clarke

[romancekiller]

I can help out with whatever is needed at the safehouse. [she is still trying to just adjusted with being back but she wants to help in whatever way she can]

As for your question, we never had much of anything like that back in space or on the ground [being floated in space was horrific in itself, no body to burn or grave to visit and on the ground, the grounders had their own rituals but you would be lucky to even get anything even a grave] In terms of staying connected to them though, something I usually do involves drawing or writing about them so it feels like they're still here.

[arclightning]

Definitely wood. Just keeps getting colder out there and I'm pretty sure that's what people are going to be using them for most.

How long have you been in the city?

[ Because Mako hasn't seen that username in a while, and he's glad to see it again. ]

Is that something you find you need to do often? Writing or drawing about them?

Text; un: darkness

[survivalthroughhate]

[Maul has been split into eight facets of himself right now, so it's always a toss-up as to who will be using the Omni at any given point. Right, now it's his Brave side that is texting back.]

We burn our dead back home. At least Jedi and Sith do. From dust we come and dust we return to, whether it is of the earthly kind or those of the stars. Sounds rather poetic, don't you think?

[arclightning]

Poetry's not really my thing, but yeah. I get that. Apparently, my mother's people do the same thing with their dead.

How do you remember them after that?