video | un: degurechaff

[verrostet]

[ A young girl sits at a table in an otherwise nondescript room, her hands folded in front of her in a picture of perfect professionalism. Her white button-down shirt is similarly perfect, not a wrinkle in sight, and tailored to her thin frame. Her gaze into her omni is expressionless — some might call it cold — and her high, childish voice is tempered with the assured enunciation of an adult. ]

Good evening. My name is Tanya von Degurechaff. I'm new here, so I have a couple questions for anyone willing to answer.

First, what kind of job do you currently have? If you don't have one, then I'm also interested in hearing what you did before you arrived here.

Second, are there any jobs or businesses you'd like to see here? I recognize that this is a broad question, but since we come from a broad range of backgrounds, any feedback is welcome.

[ A pause, a stray thought seeming to flicker through her head before she continues. ]

As for myself, I have experience with personnel management, various air-based operations, tactical field research, and administrative work. More broadly, I'm an aerial mage. The business I'd like to see is a coffee shop.

Comments

[verrostet]

Oh...? Implement that concept as a projectile and you'll have my interest. As someone who's been forced to test overly ambitious experimental arms, let me make a suggestion: you should assume the people who use your weaponry will be talentless hacks. It takes a person with strength and training to use a sword, but even people like you and I can toss a grenade.

[zib]

Oh believe me, I'm aware of that. Some of the individuals I used to make weapons for back home were... not exactly the sharpest tools in the shed, but still had to be supplied with them as part of our job regardless.

[verrostet]

[ She's glad to hear that mankind was defending itself by furnishing idiots with cutting-edge weapon tech. ]

What kinds of weapons did you make, exactly? I'm curious to know what might be more effective on an alien than a tried-and-true conventional firearm.

[zib]

[Well, it wasn't just mankind he ended up making weapons for eventually, but... he probably shouldn't mention that.]

Guns, mostly. Typically they used high grade lasers that would tear a hole through just about any material they were fired at. Others might send out an electric charge that would disable most technological equipment that was in the nearby vicinity.

I did have a couple of clients that wanted more old fashioned things that resembled swords and axes, but those weren't nearly as common as the request for guns and bombs.

[verrostet]

From laser guns to axes? That's quite the range...

[ If it's true, then he must be quite the prodigy. She's quiet for a moment, clearly thinking about something, before speaking up again. ]

I don't believe I caught your name, by the way.

[zib]

Oh, you're right! I'm sorry, that's my bad for not having given it sooner.

[He clears his throat, adopts a more proper stance than the lax one he had been in before.]

My name is Dib Membrane. It's nice to meet you, Miss Degurechaff.

[verrostet]

Ah, you can just call me Tanya.

[ It feels a little weird being addressed so formally by someone so young... even though she's one to talk. She was raised with a crowd of other children and was often one of the runts in the room, so kids being kids would never deign to speak to her in anything but the most casual manner. ]

Thanks for answering so many of my questions, Dib. I may have gotten carried away... I hope I haven't been too intrusive.

[zib]

Not at all. It's natural to ask questions when it comes to this kind of subject.

[Which, makes Tanya refreshing to talk to in comparison to the humans back home who never questioned any of the strange alien nonsense that went on around them...]

[verrostet]

We humans have probably been daydreaming about aliens since we hammered out the concept of a planet. It's fun to speculate about them, but it's common sense that any aliens that would bother flying to Earth in reality would want to exploit us. I'm sure it wasn't fun for you being the sole member of the warning line, but it was good that you did your duty. Well done.

[ She can hope that he's already gotten an official thank you from his government, but some people don't like to admit that a kid was able to do what adults couldn't. Besides, a little redundancy doesn't hurt and words cost nothing. ]

[zib]

[They didn't thank him, unfortunately, for anything he tried to do on behalf of Earth. But having someone actually praise him now certainly makes him feel better.]

Thank you. I really appreciate hearing that.

[verrostet]

Recognition is only right.

[ The heroics of individuals making up for the shortcomings of the people in charge is a sadly common tale. All the worse if the heroics aren't being properly acknowledged. ]

In any case, I'll leave you to the rest of your day. Until next time, Dib.