voice; un: BUTTMAN

[shiro2hero]

[Oh, it's a Shiro post. Clearly, this is going to be some informative speech. Important information about town, or what's going on here.]



WHO CHANGED MY NAME TO 'BUTT MAN'?


[... or not.]

[That's it. That's the post.]

Comments

[shiro2hero]

We've met?

[Maybe it was last month? It was a weird, hectic time, after all.]

I don't guard my Omni when I'm asleep. Or... in the shower. So then?

[unphase]

Mmm-hmm. You did a joint Omni post with Lance when I was still a baby Trenchie. Still am, actually, their taste in couture is obscene.

[she wouldn't forget someone who looked so serious]

Most likely. Who close to you has the most access to any of those times?

[shiro2hero]

... Oh. That post. Sorry, my memories of that time are - really fuzzy.

My entire household.

[unphase]

That's all right. I know that people come and go at random.

Is there anyone in your household who's fond of practical jokes?

[shiro2hero]

No one who wasn't... preoccupied at the time.

[unphase]

That's nice and cryptic. Or suggestive? Or both

[shiro2hero]

It's not supposed to be... Just - personal things happening.

[unphase]

Mm. Well, if there's anything like a constant, it's personal things happening. But, it could've been worse?

[shiro2hero]

... Worse than 'buttman'.

Right. Probably.

[unphase]

Absolutely! At least it was the polite version of butt, rather than some of the more explicit ones.

[shiro2hero]

More expli--

No. Never mind, I figured it out.

[unphase]

[she dissolves into giggles again]

Honestly, though, it all seems harmless. Just funny!

[shiro2hero]

It means people can't search for me properly in the network if they need me.

[unphase]

That's got to be the worst search function I've ever heard of. There's literally no other way to search for you? Even the 20th century online search options were better than that.

[shiro2hero]

There might be?

It's a magic kind of device, I think.

[unphase]

Well, yes, but if it has such a sweeping inability, color me unimpressed with magic.

[shiro2hero]

I really couldn't say. Magic has never been my specialty.

[unphase]

[she shrugs] Mine, either. Unless you count my recently-found abilities to throw fire, ice, and/or lightning?

[shiro2hero]

I would, yeah. It's apparently common from what I hear.

[unphase]

Hmm. And here, I thought I was special! [she absolutely didn't, she's just being a brat for fun]

[shiro2hero]

I'm... sorry?

I didn't realize.

[unphase]

[and she keeps a straight face. about the only thing about her which is 100% straight.

okay, she's 80% straight. but that 20% counts!]

Well, then, please do in the future. That way, those of us who've had our birthright brutally stolen from us can feel comfortable.

[...she's so full of it]

[shiro2hero]

Your... birthright?