Video; un: MrMurdery

[charlastan]

[Stan is broadcasting from what some might recognize as the interior of the Murder Hut. Throughout the month Stan's been working on repairs because it's a good way to get rid of all that bloodsport energy and also the humming endless anxiety about how October is coming.

But when he gets on camera, he's grinning! He's kind of tired around the edges, but he's chipper at least!]

Hello, Trench! It's your local Mr. Murder-y here!

[He waves, like it's an infomercial!]

Mark your calendars, folks! The Murder Hut is returning November 1st! That's right; we're absolutely not messing around with October here at the Hut. Once whatever's gonna happen happens, we'll be open for business!

[The windows directly behind Stan are pre-emptively boarded up, in fact. You know...just in case. It's fine.]

Anyway! I'm looking for unpaid labor to help me fix up the Murder Hut to get ready for our grand reopening. It's still pretty busted from that time I got eaten by a giant worm. Now, where are all those teenagers I've come to know and tolerate?

[He mimes like he's squinting out into an audience. Surely someone will turn up to help him with a pitch like that, right?]

Comments

[droptheious]

I think you and I have very different definitions of "roaring success", Stan. But yeah, I guess there are people who might enjoy all the weird nonsense you make.

...And it makes Fern happy to be able to bring you bones for your... collections, so I guess there's that.

[charlastan]

You gotta admit, the kid finds some great bones out there.

[Perhaps a concerning amount of bones, but great bones nonetheless!]

tw: skinning cryptids idek

[droptheious]

Well, to be fair, he usually finds a lot of monsters which he murders and then skins in order to get the great bones. But yeah, he's pretty skilled in it. He did a lot of...dungeon crawling back in Ooo. He gets really excited about that kind of thing.

tw: skinning cryptids I suppose!!!

[charlastan]

Yeah, yeah. So it's expert-level bone-finding. He gets right to the source!

[Look, he doesn't care where the bones come from as long as he's not the one who has to fight monsters for them. It's win/win for everybody!]

[droptheious]

[Everyone has a good time this way.]

He does- and he does really enjoy it so I can't really... fault him for that. Even if his hard work goes into your weird scam museum.

[It's said with a little less bite- he IS genuinely glad it's giving Fern a sense of purpose. ]

[charlastan]

My amazing scam museum!

[Varian will never make that correction, but Stan grins and forces it anyway. His scam museum is the best, and Fern agrees, and that's all Stan really needs.]

[droptheious]

[Fern thinks dank dungeons are the best, he thinks Varian is the best, his taste is questionable. ]

He'd probably agree to that sentiment.

[Stan is right, he is outright refusing to correct that.]