deernet | video, un:charon

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video, un:charon

Good evening, all. I think this is what is termed a 'bandwagon.' However, as I imagine we will all be busy dead, dying, or in the process of resurrecting soon, I thought I had better commit before October.

I'm opening a bakery and sweets shop.

[Lysithea pans the camera to a table that is covered with pans filled with dozens of buns, cakes, and confections of different colors. It really looks extremely well done. One would imagine that Lysithea applies herself with the same intensity to any task she undertakes.]

Everything will be sourced from traditional Fódlan desserts, passed down through family histories and collected by hand in this book. I've realized that if I'm not the one who makes these treats, I'm... never going to taste them again. So I thought I should share.

[The view changes to an enormous tome currently open to a page titled Saghert and Cream in script prominently displaying a luscious picture of some kind of fruit and cream concoction. It really looks like this was drawn by hand.]

I'm baking from my room for now. If you want anything here, you can drop by or I'll bring it over. If you want delivery, you've got to get at least a dozen, because frankly, I'm not running all over town to give you one sweet bun. I'll open a proper location when it's not Death Month.

...Thanks.

[She signs off after a moment's awkward hesitation, as if she's not sure what to do next.]

[video pt 2, ten minutes later]

It's -- me again. Upon further reflection, I have no idea how to run a business, at all, apart from the portion where you confidently declare it in public.

I would... appreciate advice.

And help. If you are willing to be paid in cake.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Oh -- thank you, Luz.

[Lysithea blushes slightly.]

It's traditional - well, perhaps that's not the right word. It's... the style of the part of the country I come from. I do like the color scheme.

You have great taste! No wonder they traded!

[And Luz was going to find a way to get her clothing back if it killed her, but Lysithea didn't have to know that].

Well sure, but just because its the style doesn't mean you don't still also need an eye to make everything work well. Some people dress in what's in style in my world and still look awful. Me, I'm all about the way something looks! It's an art!

Oh, well... the materials were fairly high quality, too. Even if they couldn't be worn outright, I expect they could be recycled in some fashion.

[High quality as far as Fodlan went. She didn't know what Trench tailoring was like. Lysithea would... give Luz a compliment about her clothing but she honestly has no idea what future clothing is supposed to look like.

She settles on:

I appreciate your tastes, too - color-wise, you know.

[purple, she means purple]

Yes, it did look really nice. Boy, it would take some trading to get those kind of clothes, huh?

[Here Luz was thinking about Lysithea's clothes and her own: she was in need of an upgrade herself, after all].

Oh, thanks! I want to try and get some stuff for myself, as long as it keeps with my appreciation of color!

I'm confident I'll be able to generate enough goodwill to trade for fabrics and dyes at some point. Don't worry - I'll get more clothes.

[She shrugs it off with a feigned lack of concern.]

And you should!

We should go browsing sometime. I can give you my thoughts about what might work well. Your build isn't too dissimilar from mine at your age - you're a bit taller, but it would work.

Oh sure, of course! I have absolute faith that you'll be able to make treats that people will love! If anyone knows about sweets it's you!

[Now what could she do to get the clothes back? What did she have to trade]?

I don't know, did we? You always seemed more...robust? I'm kinda gangly.

Are you casting aspersions on my weight?

[Lysithea frowns severely before she shakes her head.]

I jest. You're taller and slimmer, so we'll want to find flattering items for your figure - nothing that cleaves too closely. But I don't think you're thin enough that you wouldn't be able to wear, for instance, my old school uniform with only minor adjustments.

I wouldn't dare!

[Luz held up her hands, chuckling].

Yes ma'am!

I'd be down for that. You know. If you have them.

Oh - sorry, that was... hypothetical. And I don't think you would want to wear them, either. They're not very interesting...

I actually used them as my sacrifice for the ritual earlier this month.

Oh! Ok. Well, the next time I go shopping, I'll ask you then!

Ritual? What for?

The ritual with the 'letting to of the past' bit. The flower, you know.

[Lysithea pauses for a moment before the Omni pans over to a sad looking wilted lily on the windowsill.]

...I am not succeeding.

Oh right. Yes. That. I remember that.

[Luz wished she could give her friend a hug right now].

It'll take time. To tell the truth, I could be doing better with that too.

Missing someone in particular?

No... No one in particular. How do I put this?

[She thinks for a moment.]

I don't miss anything. I'm finding it hard to untangle myself from the way I was previously defined - by my limitations and by my necessary role in my previous life. That's... why it's not thriving, I think.

Hm.

But you're still you from before, only older and smart, right? And I've noticed that with you coming back. You definitely have changed a bit, and for the better, I think.

Somehow I feel like you're even stronger.

Huh?

[Lysithea's eyes grow wide.]

Older and smarter? That's... flattering, thank you. My magic has grown stronger if you look at it objectively, but I don't know about smarter.

The thing is... when you imagine yourself a certain way for many years, it's hard to break free of that image.

I mean, your experiences seem to have made you wiser, to me. You're different, and that's good!

Those things take time. I should know. I look at myself in certain ways that I should have stopped doing a long time ago.

Do you? I think it's an inescapable part of everybody's maturation process.

[Lysithea gives a small shake of the head.]

Perhaps it will help to disclose what holds us back. What sort of things do you think about?

I'm not talking about anyone else's maturation, Lysithea, just yours. I remember when you were in Deerington, you defined yourself by the war at home and how you wouldn't live long. You were more fatalistic then. Now I can see that you have a lot more to think about, that you can actually live in this place if you wanted. I'm glad you changed a little bit.

[Oh right. Yes].

Well. I've always felt I didn't really deserve the friends I have. Before the Isles, I didn't really have people I was close to other than my mom, and I can't escape the feeling I get sometimes that the people I care about are going to get sick of me. I always feel like I'm going to sabotage my own bonds by being myself.

Oh - I meant... I think that feeling bound to a past that you ought to leave behind is a part of everyone's maturation process. But thank you. I appreciate the insight.

[To be fair, it was hard to think about defining yourself any other way when there was a ticking time bomb on your life. There were things that needed to be accomplished - and Deerington had not been a part of that plan.]

You've mentioned that before, I remember. Your anxiety about making friends and how you didn't fit in.

Do you have plenty of friends now?

You know me, just saying things how I see them! Besides, I didn't know if you would come back to us. I'm really glad you did!

[Personally, Luz did think she saw a significant change in Lysithea and wanted to help her however she could. Of course, wanting that didn't mean she could actually make that happen, but it was nice to dream].

I've always had a decent amount of friends here! It's just...I always feel like I'll do something to lose them. People come into my life, and then they go, and I always get scared one day they'll realize they've just been humoring a needy, uncool girl who's nowhere near as impressive as the people around them.

[She had actually not admitted this to anyone, not even her own housemates or Korra, so she was actually trusting Lysithea with a lot here].

[Lysithea considers this thoughtfully for a moment.]

You're... fourteen, right? Something like that.

When I was your age, I was constantly trying to prove myself. The people around me frustrated me enormously. I felt as if they didn't take me seriously - that if I didn't keep pushing, they would leave me behind.

I think the most important thing I've learned as I've grown older is that most of the time... nobody feels as negatively about you as you do. Honestly, everyone's too busy worrying about themselves to think bad things about you.

[She hadn't exactly been anxious like Luz, just... extremely insecure.]

I don't know if that helps. You're my friend, of course. I won't leave you behind.

Yeah.

It does help, actually. I get that same feeling, about being left behind, but it's all bunched up around the kind of person I was back on Earth. I don't have anywhere near those kinds of social interactions anymore, and I have more friends here now, I just find myself always going back to those feelings.

You're probably right. It's definitely one of those things where I make it bigger in my head than it actually is.

I'm lucky to have you, thanks. Now I just have to stop feeling a little jealous that you're not closer to my age and I have to start thinking of you like an older sister now.

It is bizarre, isn't it? And I... guess I did leave you behind, in a sense. Most of my friends have always been older than me, so -- I'm closer in age to many of them now. But I'm sorry I've gone and made things more difficult.

I don't have any younger siblings now, but I'd be lucky to have a younger sister like you.

I don't know that there's anything to be jealous of, though. You'll grow older, too - and... I know it's a boring phrase to trot out, but there are a lot of things you'll miss in the present day if you grow up too fast.

It's not your fault, of course! You had things you had to do back in your world, and I'm honestly really glad that you did them. You look more confident and you seem...less intimidated?

Really? [Now Luz's eyes got all big misty, because the last time she had a person she considered a sister, she was honestly the happiest she'd been].

It's kind of late for that in some ways though, right? Even though I haven't physically grown, we've all pretty much grown against our will thanks to Deerington. At least you got to forget about it for a little while and focus in the things in your world.

Are they at least a little better there?

Ehm.

[Lysithea pauses delicately.]

...No.

Let's not derail, though. We can speak of the war another time. For now... just know that you have many of the qualities that people search for in true friends.

[Lysithea has the power to make even a declaration of friendship come out somewhat stiffly, even if her words are earnest.]

And we must learn to leave behind what burdens us. Those fears and those old selves.

video, un:charon

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yay, I so rarely get to use this one!

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