Event Misfire, Private Convo Made Public (CW: Innuendo, Lewdness)

[hearthebell]

[L and Light did have a conversation earlier about their plans for aiding Never Mind.

Unfortunately, their omnis are both behaving very, very badly, warping and posting this conversation to the network once it no longer resembles itself. L is blue, Light is red, and both are posting under their regular usernames.]


Do you want me to bring the handcuffs? ;)

It’s probably for the best. I don’t plan on going easy on you tonight.

Follow the trail of clothes and then the trail of candy. If you’re lucky I’ll be at the end of it.

I never depend on luck to solve my cases. If you’re not waiting for me, I’ll have to bait you with something you can’t resist.

You are a master baiter. I’ve got hard evidence. Extremely hard.

You’ve never liked things to be too simple, but if you make it too hard, I’m going to ask you to give me a hand.

Sounds like a job. Make me work, Light.

I’ll be sure to reward you well after.

Only what I deserve. You can’t be too permissive or I’ll walk all over you. I know where your soft spots are.

You’re mistaken in assuming they’ll be any parts of me that are soft after. I promised a reward for a job well done, not permission to slack off.

Slacks off? Sounds good. Just as long as it’s also jackets off, ties off, shoes off, socks off. I want to see if you’ve been playing tennis, or just sitting in the dark without moving much. I’ve dated an Olympian, so my standards are higher now.

I have another use for the tie, so I’ll keep it close by. As for ability, you shouldn’t worry. My endurance isn’t the only thing that’s improved.

My last boyfriend taught me a lot about balls and how to handle them. You won’t be disappointed, either.

Before the night is over, you’ll barely be able to remember your name, but I’ll be sure there are new lessons involved.

Help me remember my name by saying it, then. You know the one. Say it like it’s dirty.

I’ll have no choice. By the time we’re through, nothing about you will be clean.

But one part of you will be unusually clean.

I’m almost there. If you haven’t started undressing, I’ll have to do it for you.

Let me change into the clothes you can rip. I know how hot that gets you.

Don’t underestimate me. No matter what you’re wearing, I’ll manage to get them off.

Well try to get through my chastity belt, then. Guess where the key is? I bet you can’t.

The longer you force me to look, the longer it will take to get to the fun part.

I’m outside. When you hear the door, it’ll be me.

Ding-dong, it’s unlocked. Come on in, in every sense of the word.

Comments

[faceblocks]

id like to say im shocked
but nope

any idea why we got treated to this instead
weird that it changed the words up
and the topic

but weirds the new normal so
there prob is no why
or its like
because tuesday

[worldcleansing]

I hope it's not common enough to be a Tuesday. I knew I'd be in more danger here than before, but I didn't think I'd be in danger of becoming the topic of this kind of fiction.

I really don't have a theory. We don't have this kind of relationship, and even if we did, I keep my relationships much more private.

Has this happened before?

[faceblocks]

i could say ur right its not that common
and i might be right
but so much shit comes and goes i might be wrong too

ive never seen this before but that doesnt mean it hasnt happened
ive only been here since july
but i got a message someone didnt send
and ive had problems with my omni too
sending stuff to the wrong person
not user error
trench error

maybe whatever this is gets off on embarrassing ppl
or trying to

[worldcleansing]

I don't know what would be more reassuring: hearing this doesn't happen often or knowing I wasn't the first.

At least everyone seems to believe us when we tell them the conversation was faked. I have Lazarus to thank for that.

[faceblocks]

on the scale of trench things id say its pretty low

well theyd be pushing it if they tried to act like this had to be true
weird hill to die on yknow?

maybe slide some cookies his way
its not a bad way to say thanks

[worldcleansing]

As weird a hill as it'd be, it's odd to find the people here acting more mature than the so-called guardians. Still, I'm thankful for it.

I do know this is small compared to what I've heard, but it's still a jarring welcome.