video | un: warden (this post is about romance novels)

[megatheorem]

[Good day, Trench, and welcome to... whatever this is going to be. Here is one Palamedes, sitting at his desk in what may be broadly recognizable as his office in the Sanctuary, whether or not one has been in it before (it has, these days, a distressing worm-on-a-string curtain in place of a door). Palamedes shuffles through some papers, tsks, and gets up to simply walk off screen, although this is not an accidental post, for he does call back:]

Damn my filing system! Hold on, don't look away.

[So now: the sounds of shuffling, and also, footsteps on a ladder? Then the eventual soft thump as he hops back down, and finally his several layered cardigans masquerading as a torso coming back into view, before he sits back down in the chair with a hearty squeak of rusty metal.

He has even more papers now. A small pile of notebooks, actually, which he folds his hands atop before properly regarding the camera.]

So! I wrote a book. Are any of you in the publishing business? Here, locally, or otherwise? My wheelhouse is firmly the academic, and literature— while a passion project— is a field I know far less about. As such: publishing. Any tips welcome.

I am also in the market for some cover art, I think. My artistic talents leave a lot to be desired, but I've produced some helpful mock-ups, somewhere around here...

[Just kidding they're right here ready and waiting, and so he holds them up side by side:



...So, yes. His handwriting is, of course, perfectly legible.]

Like I said: I'm an academic, not an artist. I'll pay you in whatever you like, blood or stone or- [and he leans briefly off camera again, to mutter, then he's back] -or scones! Good ones, for people into that kind of thing.

[Yahoo... Draw him a horny squidmance cover page... This is ordinary.]

Obviously, children need not apply.

Oh, and the working title is Ceasefire of the Senses: A Treatise on the Juxtaposition of Passion and Reason, unless you happen to be my cruelest critic and dearest spouse, love of my life, in which case "that title is ridiculous" and it's actually called "that story in your fifty notebooks." Regardless.

[He pats the pile of notebooks, like, his title is good actually? This might be a thinly veiled opinion poll about the title.]

And as it's the season, again, if anyone needs a professional hand with their lockjoint, come down to the Lumenarium- or Sanctuary- and ask for Palamedes. I'll take care of it with a silk touch; you get to keep the stones. Drawings of squids entirely voluntary for that one.

Comments

[mehanizovati]

[well he gets hands in his hair again for that, comfortable with this terrible display of affection. in front of the worm curtain? unbelievable.

he's tempted to flick pal for that, but decides to be merciful.] If you tell anyone so the consequences will be dire. [he'll convince rio to sit on pal more than usual.] I was thinking the stars would be good. Maybe some paper chains. I'm making the tree.

[normal christmas stuff.]

Hm, it's hard to beat the mug. [dumb squidsona mug] I have an idea for you, though I'm uncertain if you'll enjoy it. I was thinking of using tweaking some of the bloodtech to cast an illusion on a window to look like the space view you'd be more used to. Is that misguided?

[these are supposed to be surprises, they're good at this.]

[mehanizovati]

[definitely how nerd parents act apparently. viktor gives offscreen pal an eyeroll before glancing back.] I'll find you later. I've been hiding from Abigail again.

[he's not too proud to admit it. that scantuary chef is scary.]

You're welcome to come before or after the party, of course. [he notes that pause though doesn't press. just a quiet tick of 'hm'] Would you prefer no gifts then? I'm not entirely sure the protocol there. I'd like to make you something.

[umbraportation]

[ That's fine with Nico, he'll make sure nothing slides off the table as it's set down. He idly wonders if Pal would use a bookbag if someone got him one. ]

Nothing in your archives about the creatures of Earth? I'm no expert on all of the animals, but I can practically name every Greek monster.

[ If only. Not that Nico's powers work that way, he certainly could give someone a new pair of lungs. ]

Sounds gross. Probably a quick source of sustenance, though. [ He may not eat a lot, but Nico does still enjoy the Experience of Food. Nico watches Pal for a moment. ] It's fine if you don't like it. But I reserve the right to capture your expression through video or photography.

[umbraportation]

[ Nico will take his nerdy parents, even if they someday embarrass him. ] If you want, I can show you some of my hiding places.

[ She is, and he knows it. Viktor has been here longer, so maybe his hiding spots are more known. ]

Okay, thanks. [ Maybe soon the teen will tell Viktor why he's not into winter parties. But it will definitely not be over the network. ] Gifts are fine, since I was planning on getting you and Palamedes something.

[hearuthinking]

They're supposed to look like that. It's kinda a weird Christmas tradition.

Make sure you get one for Viktor. He's gotta wear it for the party.

[fogsong]

Hey, not judging. To each their own. I prefer simpler things myself like Ceasefire of the Senses is sexy and piques my interest but the rest of it just makes my eyes glaze over a little. [ she is a simple young woman with simple tastes ok!

when he says he'd love to see her work, she grins. ] Awesome, gimme a minute and I'll send you a few photos.

[ he'll get three texts after her response, each one containing a large photo. ONE, TWO, THREE ] This has made me realize there's a surprising lack of men in my work.

[stilljustyou]

( That wasn't their intention, but giving someone inspiration can't be a bad thing... )

What would it be about?

[hauntedsavior]

Yeah, emergency lung replacement isn't really something someone does for funsies. But I'm glad he's doing well now.

2B, though, I don't know if she needs more help with the heart?
She got it from Woe, if that's a name you recognize. But it might not be, since even people who know her don't recognize the name, apparently.
Given circumstances, though, I'd trust you and Vik way more than I would trust Woe with my sister's internal organs.
So if anything comes up, I'll ask her to go to you two. I think she already has a professional relationship with him?

text | un: wheninlanling

[poorlittlesange]

[this is--delightful, actually. Jin Guangyao might be smiling down at his omni. absurd.]

Greetings, Palamedes-xiansheng. Congratulations on completing your book.

My sworn brother is an artist of peerless talent. Perhaps this one could facilitate an introduction? Please let me know.

[also Lan Xichen needs a real job.]

[megatheorem]

I don't know any Woes, but with a name like that and a habit of handing out hearts- for purposes noble or otherwise- I'm fairly okay with that, I think.

But sure; does she? I'll touch base with him and confirm. Between the two of us, we've all the organic-and-not-so-much bases covered, absolutely. And discretion, if she prefers it that way.

[megatheorem]

A giant pink lizard that goes on a quest. That's just the barest bones, what do you think? People like pink lizards, don't they? I'll work in at least one climb up the side of a volcano, for dramatic impact.

[megatheorem]

I'm all for it. And absolutely; he can't say no to both of us at once. If I tell him he can add some of those tiny lights to it, I'm sure he'll enjoy himself.

permavid

[megatheorem]

Oh, hey. Thanks; it's been a process. I think I started this back in April...?

[On the back of a bar napkin and mostly as a joke-and-also-flirting, but here he is, project completed. It's the rush of productivity, of course.]

I'd love to meet him, but first: is he alright with tasteful eroticism? Nothing nude, but I'm trying to make the subject matter clear to the artists up front just in case. My sketches are barely comprehensible, after all.

[megatheorem]

[He's more of a one-strap satchel kinda guy, but has he thought about getting a dedicated one? Absolutely not. Today, like all hasty trips to the Archive, is a precarious stack of Stuff. He adjusts his glasses, shrugging.]

Well, we didn't know it was called Earth. The Powers That Be aren't much fans of letting us know what's going on out there or what went on back then, you know?

[Gods, right. Fuck 'em. He settles down in a seat, thumbing at his sheet of notes while he considers Garlic Bread.]

Sure, I'll allow it. There's a photo of me somewhere out there that's supposedly a 'meme' already— so why not. [And after a beat, more seriously:] I am going to try it. But let me try your mother's recipe first, so I definitely get the important part done.

[mehanizovati]

Nico, you are a good young man. [dry, and actually grateful. please show him hiding spots, staying here for his recovery just doubled her efforts...

very fair, definitely not something for casual romance novel art posts.] Ah, good. It's supposed to be a surprise, I assume? If not you're welcome to tell me what you'd like.

[otherwise he's making him cool shit as per usual. as though he wouldn't anyway.]

[hearuthinking]

Great. It'll be a lot more fun if we're all wearin' those sweaters.

[umbraportation]

[ Exactly the kind of bookbag he was thinking about. Something that Pal could just drop things in with quick, easy movements and not have to struggle with a backpack. ]

Okay fair, the word earth lost part of its meaning somewhere along the way by someone who thought numbers were better than names. I'm still trying to wrap my head around the question of "why do some of you have Greco-Roman names, but God tossed out the Roman names for the planets?"

[ Maybe because the planet names were godly and Jod wanted to be the only one remembered. He doesn't say that, though. ]

It's a deal. Maybe you'll actually like spaghetti, it's pretty much all plant-based foods. [ Nico won't lightly season it but will leave out any sort of meat, since Pal wants to try the recipe. ]

[umbraportation]

Everyone needs a good place where they can get away. [ He absolutely will, and Nico doesn't mind sharing his spots with someone he likes.

They can have a hot drink and chill in one of the quiet places for the talk. ] Yeah, it's usually a surprise, unless someone is struggling to pick a gift to give. I can't think of anything off the top of my head that I'd like, but I can give it some thought if you need.

[ There are all kinds of "gift lists" out there, even for the holidays. It's all cool shit and Nico likes it. ]

(HERE/NOT HERE)

[opheliac]

( 'vi is very good at figure drawing, and so is sharon.' wow. guess she should go fuck herself or something. )

[dohaeris]

[wow sorry jinx she thought you were too busy throwing a whiny baby hissy fit to take commissions]

[dohaeris]

[sansa has heard vaguely about smutty books disguised as cautionary tales through randa royce and correctly passed over a number of early english novels for this reason; of course this is not the sort of thing she associates with palamedes and unthinkingly assumes the subject matter in question probably has something to do with necromancy.

a typewriter, though...(sounds like it operates on the same principle as a dishwasher...)]

Is that a machine? I imagine Viktor would do a better job at finding one than I could, but I can ask Jinx if I see her.

[she is taking jinx's departure from the rookery a little bit personally! the blood effects for palebloods this month have made it a little hard for her to be understanding.

what do you say to someone that has written a probably didactic novel on probably necromancy?]

I'm sure your book will be very interesting.

[attached are the names and email addresses of a few local bookbinders.]

[opheliac]

( still could had said my name....... )

[dohaeris]

[maybe if you spent less time hurting people and more time drawing them it would have come to mind!!]

[opheliac]

(................. better keep ur ravens away from my treehouse tonight.)

[stilljustyou]

How'd you get a pink lizard from the picture?

( A fair question, they think. )