video | un: warden (this post is about romance novels)

[megatheorem]

[Good day, Trench, and welcome to... whatever this is going to be. Here is one Palamedes, sitting at his desk in what may be broadly recognizable as his office in the Sanctuary, whether or not one has been in it before (it has, these days, a distressing worm-on-a-string curtain in place of a door). Palamedes shuffles through some papers, tsks, and gets up to simply walk off screen, although this is not an accidental post, for he does call back:]

Damn my filing system! Hold on, don't look away.

[So now: the sounds of shuffling, and also, footsteps on a ladder? Then the eventual soft thump as he hops back down, and finally his several layered cardigans masquerading as a torso coming back into view, before he sits back down in the chair with a hearty squeak of rusty metal.

He has even more papers now. A small pile of notebooks, actually, which he folds his hands atop before properly regarding the camera.]

So! I wrote a book. Are any of you in the publishing business? Here, locally, or otherwise? My wheelhouse is firmly the academic, and literature— while a passion project— is a field I know far less about. As such: publishing. Any tips welcome.

I am also in the market for some cover art, I think. My artistic talents leave a lot to be desired, but I've produced some helpful mock-ups, somewhere around here...

[Just kidding they're right here ready and waiting, and so he holds them up side by side:



...So, yes. His handwriting is, of course, perfectly legible.]

Like I said: I'm an academic, not an artist. I'll pay you in whatever you like, blood or stone or- [and he leans briefly off camera again, to mutter, then he's back] -or scones! Good ones, for people into that kind of thing.

[Yahoo... Draw him a horny squidmance cover page... This is ordinary.]

Obviously, children need not apply.

Oh, and the working title is Ceasefire of the Senses: A Treatise on the Juxtaposition of Passion and Reason, unless you happen to be my cruelest critic and dearest spouse, love of my life, in which case "that title is ridiculous" and it's actually called "that story in your fifty notebooks." Regardless.

[He pats the pile of notebooks, like, his title is good actually? This might be a thinly veiled opinion poll about the title.]

And as it's the season, again, if anyone needs a professional hand with their lockjoint, come down to the Lumenarium- or Sanctuary- and ask for Palamedes. I'll take care of it with a silk touch; you get to keep the stones. Drawings of squids entirely voluntary for that one.

Comments

[megatheorem]

Some people like the title.

["Some people" is Palamedes, more or less. Isn't that what counts. But anyway, oh, she's actually interested? Nice pull.]

I don't mind a little experimental; I'm starting to think the target demographic for this thing is just me, after all, so it's me who has the final say. That, and I'm due for a bit of art appreciation, in general.

Which is to say, yes, I'd love to see your work.

[fogsong]

Hey, not judging. To each their own. I prefer simpler things myself like Ceasefire of the Senses is sexy and piques my interest but the rest of it just makes my eyes glaze over a little. [ she is a simple young woman with simple tastes ok!

when he says he'd love to see her work, she grins. ] Awesome, gimme a minute and I'll send you a few photos.

[ he'll get three texts after her response, each one containing a large photo. ONE, TWO, THREE ] This has made me realize there's a surprising lack of men in my work.

[megatheorem]

I'm learning that the first part is resonating fairly well, actually— maybe I'll sneak the rest in in finer print. For me.

[His little treat. Now, look at these pictures... wow! He knows, hm, nothing really about art? But anyone can spot objective talent, and he honestly spends a good minute or so just scrolling through these pictures a few times, live on video. Dang...

Ah,] I could say the same for my book, outside of the central romantic plot. Actually, I was advised to 'stop adding so many tertiary characters,' but I usually get over that criticism by adding another woman with a sword to the ensemble cast.

[It's a great book. He points, uh, at the screen, because that's where the artwork is-]

This one with the skull is phenomenal. They all are; do you take non-cover art commissions? I'd love a piece to hang somewhere.

[fogsong]

Hey, it's your book. Do what makes you happy. [ it's not like he needs to worry about publishers and sales here, though she imagines he'd like other people to read it at some point. ] If you want a wordy title, go wordy. Add all the ladies with swords. Who knows, maybe it'll inspire a spinoff?

[ the compliment makes her grin a little shyly and she ducks her head. ] I, uh... Thanks. I'd be happy to make you a piece. Any idea what you'd like?

[megatheorem]

Someone could file the names off, give them new ones, and write their own separate thing, and I'd still be flattered. But they should definitely add more women with swords.

[It's the done thing. In his opinion, anyway, and he is The Author, so like, Word of Palamedes or whatever. Now then, art...!!]

Well, I do adore the skull; do you think you could do another? With some differences. I have a specific skull in mind. [........and, because that's weird to just say,] It's not anyone's, but it has accessories.

[fogsong]

[ that is a weird thing for him to say but it doesn't seem to faze her any ] I'd be happy to do another skull for you, accessories and all. What kind of accessories are we talking about?

[megatheorem]

It's— hold on, let me give it a whirl.

[A brief shuffling for new paper and some scribbling, before he holds up a mysteriously somehow more competent skull sketch, but only competent insofar as committing an image to memory makes it easier to draw. Behold: accessory skull.]

This one. And, if at all sensible, as vibrant as humanly possible— but leave the scroll in gray.

[fogsong]

[ she lets out a low whistle ]

Looks like there might be a bit of an artist in you. [ she's teasing just a little ]

I can do vibrant. Any specific colors you're thinking of aside from the gray scroll or can I just go wild?

[megatheorem]

Oh, don't encourage me— I'll be putting skulls on everything. It will look terrible in no time.

[Like the Cool S from primary school, but gothier.]

And please, go wild to your heart's content.

[fogsong]

Hey, but you'd just keep getting better at that skull. [ she's one of those people that's all for an abundance of doodles on everything. ]

Awesome. I'll try to have something to show you in a week or two, though my work can take a bit of time, especially with how difficult some paints can be to get. [ she's grinning widely though clearly excited for the project ]

[megatheorem]

I've memorized the relevant parts, I think. [Literally, he has; this is the only reason he can draw it.]

Thanks, though; you could bring it by Sanctuary? Or I could meet you at your... studio? And then we can work out the terms of payment.

[fogsong]

I just paint at home. No fancy studio. [ that feels like a lot of work for someone who would rather just stay home than go out. ] But I can bring it by Sanctuary for you, no problem.

[megatheorem]

Sanctuary it is. Thank for you this; just drop me a line when you're ready.