(TXT) — UN: BOMBSHELL

[opheliac]

treennnch! hi. its me. ure fav loose cannon, the demolition diva, the SIZZLING FIRECRACKER OF BABES!! 💣💥💣💥

ok sooooooooooooooo earworm kicked me out again. for like the 239482034th time. the bouncer said im too WILD.

think about that for a sec.
a club where u drink, party, eat the mushies, and let loose says IM TOO wild? good old bobby. so silly w/ his bouncer bounce ways. 🤣🤣🤣🤣

anyway cutting to the chase, so right when i was going to break in like i always do when he kicks me out, i had a BOMBING IDEA! 🤯

i thought why not spend time w/ my trench buddies? aaaannnd its been a while since i played the solve ur prob game. so thats what we're doing here.

give me prob. tell me ur issue. and jinx, the best engineer in all of this city will solve them for u. believe me when i say u'll get the BEST ADVICE u'll ever had. bc itll be honest truth.

heres a freebie advice on the house to start us off:

Q) JINX!! how do we kill those big nasty buggies?

A) well TIMMY LET ME TELL U! u just burn them to the crisp and feed them to mr.mugsy. hes hungry.

thats just a lil sneak peek of what my knowledge can do for u. and if u dont have a question? give me a dare. ill do all kinds of dares.

oh and ive been doing a lot of drinking so if i pass out all the sudden b4 answering getting ur question, ill get it in the morning! 🐵🙈🙉🙊

Comments

text | un: sds

[fogsong]

Oh, Great & Knowledgeable Jinx, I'm having serious art block and can't seem to paint anything good. You got any good advice for me?

[opheliac]

okok listen up kid. the cure for art block is V. simple.
making a masterpiece is all in the heart. THE CORE muscle of all of our bodies.
next to the brain but we're not talking about that rn.

if ure having an art block thaaaaaat means that lil organ is having sum trouble expressing itself. it needs some attention and u got to take care of it!

so u have to dig deep in urself ok? see whats troubling that heart and fix it up! if u cant find the prob or u dont think anything is rly wrong with it, then maybe it just needs a change in scenery. tough to do in this place w/ the bugs and junk. BUT!!!

hear me out, chubby cheeks. have u explored EVERY place in trench? is there a store or building u havent checked out yet? if there are sum, go give them a visit! inspiration hits us like a yeti building.... w/e they smash together. and that heart will start going in hyper drive and start creating!!!

so FLY OFF MY FRIEND! explore the world, meet more ppl, take a wild ride in doing smth u havent done before. ur heart muscle will thank u for the experience. 😄😄😄

[fogsong]

Chubby cheeks? You're lucky I like my chubby, youthful cheeks. It makes me cute as a button.

But all right. Okay. This ain't bad advice. I don't really feel like digging deep in myself to sort that out but maybe a city adventure isn't such a bad idea. I really should explore Gaze even though I hate how it makes me feel. It's really the worst district but it's got some amazing architecture.

[opheliac]

i bet u make cute fish faces too. GLUB GLUB!
of course its not bad advice. IM PERFECT W/ THEM!
if u got another one, go ahead and shoot while i make a bonfire.

[fogsong]

The cutest, actually.

Wish I had another problem you could give me advice for but... I don't. How about we spin this around, though? Do you need any advice, Jinx? Let your best friend solve your problems.

[Text] un: secondtolast

[icanhearscreams]

If you're drunk maybe you should lay down.

And my problems right now are mostly 'how do I get my dog to stop sitting on me'.

[opheliac]

doing that is for chumps.
and the answer to THAT question is u let the dog sit on u.
its expressing love and comfort. are u such a monster that ure going to DENY its love?
i thought i knew u.

[icanhearscreams]

I have work to do in the garden before it gets too dark.

Also it's my omen, he should know I have work to do.

[opheliac]

im an expert w/ omen speak. and he is telling me that u are working too hard.
take a load off
keep up ur feet
SCREAM ON TOP OF A BUILDING!!!

text; username:mariathorpe

[givetheslip]

the best advice, hmm? on any subject?

[opheliac]

w/e u got for me, i got an answer for. shoot ur question.

[givetheslip]

it's damnably hot for those of my blood type. clothes are becoming very uncomfortable but it's not considered polite to walk around nude.

cw: nsfw - talk of nudity

[opheliac]

so what? do it anyway!! thats what im doing 🤣
well im not naked NOW but im going to be.

text; un: lookingforshinsengumi

[tealeafs]

[ Please, Jinx. There's so many worrisome things in even just this one post.. So many.

Chizuru isn't even fully sure where to start, her fingers idly hovering above the words before she finally realises what she should maybe write first. A-And then other stuff can be considered in a few moments, maybe? ]

why have you been doing a lot of drinking
are you at least somewhere safe in case you pass out

[ P-Please don't blame her for being worried.. :( ]

[opheliac]

( drunk, complicated feelings + talking to chizuru? that's a car crash waiting to happen. but at the same time, jinx wants to yell out, "fuck it, i don't care". she wants to drunk dance on tabletops, steal everyone's drink, and be wild and hysterical. which is the solo reason why the bouncer of earworm kicked her out in the first place. )

u know what? u asked a question and im STICKING to my GUNS of honesty!
bc shit sux so its time to BLOW THE SUX STAND TO THE hell yea PARTY STAND ✨🎉✨🎉✨🎉✨🎉✨✨✨✨🎉🎉✨✨✨✨

i got a pile of leaves that i can fall asleep in.

[tealeafs]

[ Okay.

Yes.

Now this definitely is sounding worrying. She knows that sometimes people just drink for fun - the men back home did that plenty of times, after all, and she's seen them acting similarly wild because of it.

But when Jinx is admitting she's drinking because 'shit sux'? Well, that's bad. And Chizuru can't just leave a bad thing be, not when she's worried. ]

can you tell me where you are right now
please
?

i will help you get to a proper bed
it is better to sleep there

[opheliac]

ooo is this a test? will i cut the wrong wire if i lose focus? hmmm HMMMMMMMM!

( a pause but then: )

i got it under control, ru. beds get too itchy for me sometimes. and who doesnt want to sleep under the night sky? sum find it hypnotic.

txt; @anonymous

[wrenchedup]

what the fuck demolition diva is such a great name holy shit

[opheliac]

thnx!!! i came up w/ it myself. 😋

so whats ur story? need sum advice? trouble in hell paradise?

[wrenchedup]

ITS SO GOOD.

jinx. i have a problem. i don't have a flamethrower and this upsets me.

[opheliac]

oh thats easy. ready for the answer?
u make one!

TADA! thnx 4 stopping by. unless u have another prob.

un: countrymouse

[overlies]

Are you going to need a hangover kit?

[opheliac]

a hangover kit? NO WAY! thats for ppl who cant handle their l i q u o r.
oh oh btw. im calling u mouse for a nick.
that ok w/ u?

[overlies]

Would that make me a Makimouse?

[opheliac]

yes! makimouse sounds p. cute. i use to have a bomb named squeakers. maybe u are squeakers but in a diff form. 🐭