video; un: padlocks

[enblightened]

I have made my warning to a handful of you before, but there are many that I've yet to meet. And so, this is primarily to those who do not know me.

I am something to be wary of. 'Tis not meant as a threat, but a matter of what I am. Call it what you shall, be it a curse or condition, but the brand on my head is not for display only. Many would call me an abomination where I am from, and it is not far from the truth.

I fight back the instincts of a demon inside of me. I hold it back by whatever means I am able, with my will and the bonds I take with me. With years of practice, I am typically able to hold it back, but there can never be a promise of my willpower. If there comes a time in which this beast emerges and I transform, I do not expect mercy on my behalf.

I understand that there are some with a similar situation as myself, or that you have experienced enough horrors to be prepared for it. Making demands of a person is impossible, I know that, but I want to be clear that I am a thing to be careful with.

...Thank you for listening. Be well, friends and strangers alike.

Comments

( video | un: duckling )

[danserai]

[ that all sounds very sad . . . ]

Do you have a name though?

[enblightened]

Yes. It's Bigby. Though hardly used much where I am from.

And you, child?

[danserai]

Oh, my name is Ahiru.

Uhm, I also have a question, if that's okay . . .

[enblightened]

You may ask. I will attempt to answer.

1/3

[danserai]

Okay, so uhm . . . does the brand hurt you too? Is it something you'd like to cover up?

[danserai]

[ oh wait that's super offensive isn't it. ]

W-What I mean is it doesn't look bad, it looks okay! And it's not scary or anything and I don't mind it even if it's weird other people mind it, they shouldn't because it's not their face it's your face . . .

3/3

[danserai]

[ she quietens down, trying to bring her thoughts to a conclusion. ]

I mean it sounds like you're hurting yourself to keep people safe. And maybe we can . . . find ways to make you feel better . . . ?

[enblightened]

It is remarkable to me the wells of kindness that others have in this place, despite everything. You did not need to ask, but you did anyway.

There is nothing to do for the scars I already bear. However, lowering my stress helps to keep it contained, and for me to control it. There are things, like arts and poetry. Music.

[danserai]

[ her face colours at the praise. ]

I mean, I think anyone should ask because it's important to check on people . . .

Oh! I like ballet and ballet has nice music. Maybe you'd like to listen to those?

video | klapbak | private

[klussy]

(This immediately catches Eddie's attention. He filters to a private video.)

Hey man. If you've got a condition, I can maybe help you live with it. Or try anyway. Name's Eddie.

[enblightened]

Compassion is too rare where I am from. Stilted, in the crawling darkness. Perhaps I am the one that needs to readjust my thinking now that I am here.

I would indeed. Too long it's been since I've heard such music. I had a companion both talented and cruel with his lute, but I've not heard anything more in years.

private

[enblightened]

I suppose that I should not shrug off an attempt. What might you have in mind?

[danserai]

Oh, then you might like this one.

It is Tchaikovsky's Waltz of the Flowers.

[enblightened]

Ah-- I did not realize that these devices were capable of also playing music. I was flummoxed momentarily...

I've never heard this before. Perhaps I missed it in my decades gone from the world? How beautiful.

[danserai]

Maybe. They're really famous, I think.

[ she's not sure, but ballet is the center of her world and basically the only subject she knows well. ]

You can probably find a lot more you enjoy.

[enblightened]

I would gladly cherish anything you suggest. What others have you to offer?

[danserai]

Oh, ummm Tchaikovsky also did Swan Lake and Sleeping Beauty . . . Then there's Romeo and Juliet, Coppelia, Giselle . . .

The stories can be a bit sad, but the music is always nice.

(private) video | un: P.G.

[possessum]

( Ah...... Yet again, another unexpected reminder that Peter's not alone in the sense of.... being afflicted with something within. Some beast, some lurking darkness.

Still, he's unused to talking about it aloud. It takes him some time before he actually forms an answer, turning on his own video function, setting it to private. Some day, he knows he should make an announcement like this, too. Warn the public — they deserve to know.

For now, he's still too afraid for that much. But... he's capable of reaching out to this person, at least. It's carefully, timidly: the young man on the feed now is visibly nervous, dark-rimmed eyes a little wide, voice a bit uneven. )

Hello. ( He seems uncertain of just what he wants to say. Finally— )

This is... really brave of you. Saying it aloud to... warn people. ( The boy (more of a man now, nineteen, but he still feels so small most days) hesitates, brow knitting almost as though he's apologetic for what he asks. )

Are you scared someone might... come after you? Because of this.

[enblightened]

Bittersweet encourages us to enjoy the what silver lining we find in our own lives. I don't dislike such things necessarily.

Thank you, Ahiru. Perhaps this night I will sleep restfully.

[klussy]

That would really depend on the specifics of your condition and general biology. Everyone's a little different. (Interdimensional species identification was a pain.)

Is it a real demon inside of you or are we being metaphorical here?

private

[enblightened]

[Ah. He can see it, the exhaustion and toll on this young man. Easily, his heart goes out to him.

It does truly seem Bigby is far from the only one cursed. The only benefit is that he has had literal decades to understand how to endure it.]

Brave? That, I could never claim. It is imperative to ensure the lives of others are safe from me, if anything.

It is possible. And I would indeed defend myself if that were the case. I am not so self-sacrificial, nor do I ever intend on living my life caged once more. However, that is if I still have my wits about me.

If I were no longer a man... well. Then that is different.

Speak. You bear a burden yourself, yes?

[danserai]

[ bittersweet . . . she wonders about that. princess tutu . . . tragic or bittersweet? and she couldn't even be fully honest with anyone.

but ahiru puts it aside for now. ]

Mmm, I hope it helps and you feel better.

[enblightened]

I am being quite literal. A beast lives in me, its instincts always growling. I do indeed transform into it either at will or... not always at will.

[enblightened]

It does already.

[danserai]

If I find more, I'll send them your way.