video, un: metalhead69, Dec 25th—Merry Charles Day

[bardbarous]

[ Starring: Tuck, Vyng, Billie ]


[ At first you see the bushy-bearded face of Tachome Dhaume the barbarian checking to make sure the "video" setting is on. Then it pans across a living room—Michael's living room, to be precise—and stops on his best friend Vyng.

Oh, and a broken window behind him. ]

C'mere, Billie! Look who came last night!

[ With all the enthusiasm of a parent hyping up the legend of Santa, he leads his son over to the broken window where shards of glass lay on the ground. With eyes as big as saucers, Billie looks up at his parents. ]

Charles!

That's right, buddy! Charles found us all the way in Trench and broke in last night! [ The video moves over to a half-eaten plate of meatballs(?). ] He ate some of the meatballs we left out for him, too.

[ Nevermind that the evidence of who really ate some of their questionable meatballs is still stuck to Tuck's beard. ]

He left you a present. Look! He got you new nesting material for your bed!

[ In the corner is a small pile of soft things: strips of fabric, sheep wool, stuffing that probably came out of a couch. ]

Wow. It's a Charles miracle! Wait... Where're your presents?

[ Not wanting to blow the whistle on their ruse, Tuck quickly makes eye contact with Vyng to get them on the same page. ]

Uhhh...

He... left before he could drop ours off.

Yeah, I... woke up and heard him break in. And as he was... eating the... meatballs, I fought him. And then he ran off.

You got to fight Charles?! Why didn't you wake me up?

Because! He... told us not to.

Yeah, he said you needed your... beauty sleep.

Next year you can fight him, Billie.

[ It doesn't sit well with Billie, who is ready to knife a Charles this very minute, but there's little he can do about it on Charles day. The break ins are long past! With a huff, he relents and flops on his pile of fluff like a curious cat. ]

Merry Charles, Billie! Merry Charles, Vyng!

Merry Charles, everyone!

Comments

[siriusly]

Wait--

Someone broke in?!

[what the hell, housemates! Manabu only caught the tail end of that message coming down the stairs, but he can see the window, hears about a fight...

he hops down the last three stairs and bustles in, Concerned.]

Is anyone hurt?

[bardbarous]

[ Oh my god, this dork! Tuck's eyes get unnecessarily huge to make sure his point gets across as he begins to spin another tale about Charles, so that the holiday isn't ruined for Billie. ]

Yeah, but it's okay. [ The last word is emphasized with another eye bulge and a few pointed glances down at their tiny son as if to say, "Don't ruin this, you fucking nerd!" ] I fought him off, and it's fine.

[siriusly]

[blink.

blinkblink.

Manabu gawks back at Tuck for a beat, then down at the kid, then back at Tuck.

...right. think of the children.]

R...right...um. Good, good job... [his eyes wince, and he juts his thumb toward the other room.] Maybe...tell me about it? In the other room? [so he can be regaled with the break-in details without scarring a kid?]

[bardbarous]

[ With an annoyed look, Tuck relents to what will likely be a long boring conversation! Ugghh! ]

Dude, you almost ruined the spirit of the holidays!

[siriusly]

H-huh-?! [Manabu startles, getting hot in the face. that's rude! he wasn't doing any ruining! not on purpose!!] Wait, what the heck do you mean? You said there was a break-in, so I--!

[wapples]

[Billie fluffs his stuffing, sheep wool, and yes, even the fabric strips as Manubu bounds down the stairs. He's still disappointed he missed fighting Charles, but... next year, he will be waiting!

He looks up.]

It was Charles!

[He says it as though Manabu should absolutely know who Charles is. EVERYONE knows who Charles is.]

See? He left presents! Except... Tuck fought him off before he left anyone else's. Sorry.

[siriusly]

[Manabu continues to frown, no recognition hitting his features.

with wincing eyes:] Charles is...aaaan acquaintance of yours?

[wapples]

[Billie just stares.

Manabu. This is important. How do you not know who Charles is.]

No... I would've fought him too, but Tuck and Vyng didn't wake me up! He breaks into houses and leaves presents. I didn't think he'd even find us here!

[siriusly]

[in space, no one can hear you charles.

breaks into...presents...

wait.

squint.]

...You sure you're not talking about Santa Claus?

[wapples]

[It's Billie's turn to stare blank faced. He is sure he's never heard of Santa Claus before.]

Huh? What does Sandy Claws have to do with anything?

[Is that Shiro's lion's name? He has no idea.]

[siriusly]

...

[right about now, Manabu can feel Death in a Glare from Tuck. he grimaces, then rubs at his face.]

Um, no-nothing, I guess. Never mind. I'm gonna...talk to... [points at Tuck, points at another room while starting to scoot.] Yeah...

[wapples]

[Billie is completely oblivious to Tuck's death glare.]

Oh, yeah, okay.

[He waves and settles back down in his pile of fluff.]

Video; un: darkness

[survivalthroughhate]

I see the tradition of someone breaking into people's homes and leaving them gifts runs through all sorts of cultures.

[Maul loved the whole breaking and entering thing when he learned about it. You can bet your booty he snuck down a few chimneys to leave presents for the people he actually liked just to prove that he could.]

[bardbarous]

Really? Huh. We don't have a reformed-burglar-turned-gift-giver legend where I'm from. Charles Eve is just in the Principalities.

[survivalthroughhate]

And who exactly is this....Charles?

[What can Maul say? He's curious now as to how things work in Vyng and Tuck's world.]

[bardbarous]

So, the story goes that Charles was a burglar. He broke into people's houses and stole their silverware and whatever else. But then he found the light and repented. He gave back to the families he took from, and holy shit there were a lot of them!

Word got around, people started leaving meatballs out to lure him in. I think some people would surprise him and it'd turn into a fight. But he always left a present behind for everyone.

[survivalthroughhate]

How very interesting.

[Though Maul's tone is a little dry, he means them. After talking with Orpheus, he's begun to see how many worlds seemed to have similar stories and legends if one only took the time to pay attention and start seeing the patterns.]