text; un: padlocks

[enblightened]

those capable of magic i need you

i need to better bind myself

enchant or curse or whatever you do hold me back just hold it back all of me

i need more bonds more locks more

oh i am not enough


[cw: mention of cannibalism in comments]

Comments

[morningstud]

Paleblood jewelry allegedly can put a person in a trance. I have not attempted it myself, but perhaps there would be a way to use one to pacify the beast inside of you.

I cannot pretend to know what you're going through, but I have learned it's important to listen.

[enblightened]

i would not be unwilling to try. anything but cages.

listen?

[morningstud]

Tell me what happened to you. How it makes you feel. Nothing held back.

I have someone where I'm from who does it for me. Someone who has helped me a great deal for several years.

It does not change anything, but it feels better just saying it.

Believe me, nothing you tell me would surprise or horrify me. I've lived a very, very long life.

[enblightened]

it is an unending hunger
the need to hunt and eat
flesh
hearts
livers
fresh meat
it wants to be a predator, to lash out and eat and eat
it rages and waits, always
it never stops
a mindless stupid horrible beast

[morningstud]

[His first thought is that that's straight up horrifying, something better left to legend and superstition.

The second is, of course, the fact that it's real.]

I'm sorry.

Are you aware of some sort of trigger for it? Was it a curse, some sort of inherited trait?

[If Linda could see him now... well. Maybe it's best if she doesn't.]

[enblightened]

if i am not calm enough. stress. anger. if i am in mortal danger or pain.
i normally meditate or keep myself busy

it
formed after an accident.
i was trying to help people once
people who had transformed because of the darkness and wicked magic
it backfired onto me in turn.
i realize the irony

[morningstud]

That would make the situation we find ourselves in quite the horrible place for you.

It's not your fault. You were trying to help people.

What a terrible "thank you" to be given.

[enblightened]

trench is no more terrible than where i was previously
in fact for a time i thought i was in a better place.

ha
the church had their way of thanking me too.

[morningstud]

Those who use religion as a means to harm others earn my scorn more than most.

The capacity for horrors against their own kind is one of the worst aspects humanity has to offer. I wish there was more than I could offer you besides condolences. It feels hollow, considering.

[enblightened]

i've little doubt it is sincere from you
i know in my heart that this is not something i earned
though it is difficult to think otherwise at times

now i merely
i wonder
if my control slipped somehow beyond me

[morningstud]

Now that I have more of a grasp of your situation than I did before, I believe I understand now where you're coming from.

Perhaps there is a way to use jewelry made from paleblood to if nothing else, quell the beast long enough for you to remove yourself from a situation.

[Or perhaps gives someone else time to escape. He's never attempted magic before, so he has no idea how it works.]

[enblightened]

i would be willing to try.
there is not much else to do but try.

[morningstud]

I will do whatever I can for you.

[enblightened]

i shall not forget your kindness.

thank you.

[morningstud]

Think nothing of it.

You should never have been treated so horribly in the first place.