video by omen;

[retsuden]

[The video opens on Sasuke, Lance is “directing” behind the “camera” (omen) with cue cards for him to read, and this music starts playing in the background. Lance gestures widely off camera in an urgent miming to Sasuke to start reciting what is written on the cards.]

[ Sasuke was clearly not expecting the music and he already looks so tired before he even looks at the cards. He’s trying. Honest. His forehead scrunches as he starts to recite, but it’s coming out in his usual flat tone, which is probably not helping anything. ]

Have you ever wanted to be cool… like the other side of the pillow? [ Sasuke looks off camera at Lance with irritation. ] You said you wouldn’t make me sound like an idiot.

[Lance is giving Sasuke the flattest look, then in a hushed urgent voice:] Dude, don’t make it weird, just keep going. No turning back now.

[He has more cards and they go with the music, stop messing with the flow! They haven’t even gotten to the memes yet.]

[ He gives him a look that makes it clear he doesn’t think he’s the one making this weird. Deep breath. He knows people better than you, Sasuke, remember?? ]

Awesome at kicking ass and taking names? Show off some cool ninja moves here. [ … Oh. Wait. He gets it. He rubs his forehead before going to takes a deep breath, and then blows a ball of fire on the cards to burn them.

There. Ninja move shown off. ]

Ninjutsu isn’t about blitzing chakras or becoming one with the shadows. I’m not using these.

[Lance isn’t affected by fire, so he just holds the burning cards in his hands and uses his powers to toss the burning pile into frame as he squints in annoyance.] Oh come on, we hadn’t even gotten to the best part!

[ Sasuke takes a deep breath, before deciding to just do what he probably would have from the start. ]

I’m offering to teach people ninjutsu and taijutsu; it’s the way the ninja in my world perform battle techniques and focuses on utilizing one’s inner life force, also known as chakra, to manipulate the physical chakra around you. Taijutsu is basic martial arts techniques that use chakra to increase the strength of both your offensive moves and your defensive blocks. I believe it will be able to help people who need to learn how to control their new found blood powers and, for those who are dedicated enough, will grant similar abilities to those who have no special blood powers at all. [ He forms a ball of water in his hand, quickly warps it with a wind current to freeze it, and then melts it by heating his palm. ] If you are interested, please let me know.

[ Boring!! But to the point. Sasuke gives Lance a look, like he’s offering to let him wrap up with whatever he wants here. Is that wise?? Probably not.

Lance rolls his eyes offscreen and adds, poking his head into frame: ] Super Awesome Ninja School, suck it Cobra Kai!

[Then he exits frame and has his Omen project a certain video, and the music is still playing:]

Watch on YouTube

Comments

[asas]

That's what I did in High School when I was banned from the gymnasium!

[ he seems pretty proud of that, in the same sentence as "banned from"— ]

I'll just have to be in bed by 7:30, so I get my eight hours of sleep.

[ a thumbs up! ]

[retsuden]

[ Okay, so as someone who was banned from his whole ass village, he shouldn't be surprised by this. But it's Shōyō. ]

You got banned from a gym. What, did you exceed their limitations on personal volume control?

[asas]

. . . I wasn’t working as a team with our Setter.

[ which sounds less cool. like shit, you went to jail?? for what?? i tried to shoplift a nail filer. ]

We were banned from club activities until we got along— so we challenged the upperclassmen to a set to prove we could work as a team. We’d go to the gym at four AM so no one would see us practicing in there.

[ alas, it was a fond memory, now that he looks back. ]

[retsuden]

[ .............. Okay yeah that's exactly what he should have expected. ]

Mm. An important lessons. Teamwork was one of the first things my sensei pushed on us. If we couldn't master it, we would have lost our titles as ninja.

[asas]

[ how important that is! shōyō nods. ]

We’re partners, now, when we’re on the national team. And rivals when we’re on our other teams.

[ him in brazil, kageyama in italy— having such a bond is absolutely exciting. since sasuke has been through this particular lesson, he wonders— ]

Did you have someone like that?

[retsuden]

[ Did he...? Sasuke swallows slightly at the question, glancing away from the feed. Thinking about home, about the people he misses, is the only time that he really feels that sense of not belonging in this place. What was the purpose of being in a world without Naruto in it?

In a few short days he'll wonder if thinking that way had some kind of magic summoning property to it, BUT FOR NOW!!! He is in the dark and just misses that stupid blond. ]

My best friend. We've always been rivals, but we were placed on the same team together, and found out that we work better with one another than against. It didn't stop us from butting heads, but... Mm. I don't think anything stops him from butting heads.

[asas]

[ yes gay is very, very powerful. shōyō huffs out a breathy laugh as he reminds himself of his own rival and walks himself through memories. they were never really “best friends”, they didn’t hang out with each other during their free time or chat about things friends would.

but, when it came to being on the court, they were like flesh and blood. a cannon and the high caliber bullet that went in it. ]

Or being stupid, right?

[ shōyō thinks kageyama is the dumb one, but little does he know . . .

he’s dumber.

(or they’re just both dumbest on different levels. ]

[retsuden]

[ That gets an actual laugh out of him— it's still quiet, like everything Sasuke does, but it's more than a single chuckle or a half-amused snort like he's usually prone to. ]

Biggest idiot I've ever met.

[ He says like someone who loves that idiot very, very much. ]

... You remind me of him.

[asas]

[ that was a laugh from big tsundere professor sasuke fan paper! the biggest idiot. they totally are! they're their best idiots too, shoyo can't help but to think. his mouth widens to flash his teeth in a grand smile— ]

[asas]

[ augh, reminds him of him, what an honor! augh!! ]

[asas]

[ wh ]

[asas]

[ ]

(done!)

[asas]

—I feel like I've been slapped.

[retsuden]

[ Oh that facial journey was worth the comment alone. He still has a smirk on his face as he gives a small shrug. ]

I'm told I need to work on my compliments.

[asas]

Yuh-huh! Now I dunno if I should feel flattered or offended, Sensei! [ and, actually— ] —I feel both!

[retsuden]

I'd think being compared to a legendary ninja who saved my world would be more complimentary in the end.

[asas]

[ this is the second shoyo's soul leaves his body. after a second of just staring into a voided space, he clutches his chest. ]

I now feel endlessly flattered.