audio ; un: a.solo

[hopesparks]

[ There's a faint sound of wind in the background of his broadcast, as if he's sitting somewhere up high. ]

Hello. Again. [ Oof, okay, not the strongest start. ] I'm Anakin Solo, a knight of the Jedi Order, at your service. I sort of remember being here before, and I wanted to thank everyone who helped me out.

They offered me a bed at the orphanage, but I don't want to take it from someone who might need it.
How does housing work here, exactly? I don't mind sleeping outside, but that doesn't seem wise in the long run.

[ A pause. ]

By the way, I don't remember the sky being like this before-- is this normal? As normal as anything is here, I mean.

[ Another pause. He's clearly not in his element. ]

Thanks again.

[ The feed ends. ]


( ooc: let me know if you want to keep his tdm thread! i'm cool either way. )

Comments

[hopesparks]

You're not old, Master Kenobi.

[ Anakin readjusts the strap of his bag. ]

Is there somewhere I can put my stuff down?

[jedies]

Anywhere you like. I have a few extra rooms.

[hopesparks]

Thank you.

[ He disappears down the hallway to find an unoccupied room. It doesn't take long, and he returns to the main living area not long after, having removed his boots and outer cloak. Even though he has a room now, he's not sure he can sleep. ]

[jedies]

Everything all right?

[hopesparks]

Yeah.

[ He hesitates. ] Just overwhelmed. And there's something my grandfather said that I'm stuck on.

[jedies]

[ hmm. ]

What did he say?

[hopesparks]

[ Anakin sits down and sorts out his thoughts. ]

He said that Jedi can't have family. That love and attachment are forbidden.

[jedies]

[ ah. obi-wan frowns. ]

That's rather reductive of him and he should know better. Attachments such as possessing people and fear of letting them go is forbidden. But the Jedi have always been a family. We all grew up together.

It's simply that our family differs from the traditional kind. It's true that we don't get married but that is simply because we give an oath to the Order.

[hopesparks]

[ Anakin nods minutely. Most of it makes sense to him and echoes what he was already taught. Possession isn't love. Fear is to be respected but mastered.

It's the last part that he's a bit stuck on. ]

That's the part that I'm a little stuck on. [ Slowly: ] The thought process is that you can't honor both vows fully if you have both at the same time?

[jedies]

It's not as though you can't. It's the temptation is strong. Jedi commit to selflessness.

But at the same time, to expect others to put aside their family for that is a difficult calling.

[hopesparks]

That's why initiates would've been brought to the Order very young, right?

[jedies]

That's right. It is to ease the way when it comes to understanding attachments. Not a condemnation of families themselves.

[hopesparks]

They never wonder? About their biological families?

[jedies]

Of course. And they're allowed to visit their families if they want to.

[hopesparks]

Oh. He made it sound like you could never see your family again.

[ Which didn't sound quite right to him, but Anakin has little to go on aside from the pieces that the Empire left behind. ]

[jedies]

[ obi-wan frowns. ]

No. You could always look up and visit your family should you choose to. It was never forbidden.

[ gehren after all left the order at a young age to locate her father. no one stopped her. no one forbade her. ]

[hopesparks]

[ Hmm. He wonders why his grandfather would've implied otherwise. Had he misunderstood somehow? Was it an effect of the soul bond muddling the older Anakin's thoughts? ]

Did you ever look yours up?

[ He blurts it out without thinking in a rare show of a lack of foresight. He manages to feel a tinge of embarrassment at least. ]

[jedies]

[ obi-wan hums. ]

I did, long ago. I wanted to see how they were faring. But that's as far as I wanted to go.

[hopesparks]

[ Anakin nods, his expression thoughtful. ]

I guess... I was confused because the Order-- my Order-- is tied so much to my family that I couldn't imagine separating the two. So what you've said makes a lot more sense to me.

[jedies]

And that's not surprising, with . . . so few left.

But the Order in my time was larger. Committed to an entire galaxy at all times. So we needed a different kind of training and upbringing.

[hopesparks]

We're getting more members over time.

[ He's not sure why he's trying to reassure Obi-Wan, only that he can't bear to give him a reason to feel hopeless about the future. 100 is nothing near the 10,000 the Order had scarcely forty years ago, but it's more than anyone expected. ]

Even ten thousand doesn't seem like enough for a whole galaxy.

[jedies]

[ his expressions grows somber. ]

No. It's not.

[hopesparks]

[ Anakin's expression becomes equally somber. ]

Sorry.

[jedies]

[ obi-wan shakes his head, rueful. ]

There's no need. As long as the Jedi exist, in some shape or form, I am content.

[hopesparks]

[ Anakin looks at Obi-Wan searchingly. He doesn't think Obi-Wan is lying, but it's hard to imagine that someone who saw the Order at its height would be content with 100 people in a ragtag group just making it up as they go. The galaxy at large is far from impressed by them.

Finally, he looks away and nods slightly, as if accepting Obi-Wan's answer. ]

We're more resilient than most people expect, I think.