text | un: anonymous

[possessum]

( This is not Peter Graham, though of course, posting anonymously takes away that possibility. The user didn't want to use the boy's network handle, to inevitably be seen through the filter of "Not Peter."

The user is trying to define his own identity. )

why did you choose your title here on this THING
what is the meaning
?
?

( ...Texting is still something he struggles with, though the demon has been watching and learning and forming his own conclusions on how to do it. Autocorrect is a life-saver. Two questions get two question marks. ....Even if they go in the wrong place. )

i will grant you a
GOLDEN COIN
if you
RESPOND

( ...For those who know Paimon fairly well, that particular offer of exchange might betray who he is. But the demon of Knowledge is curious to hear reasons, and within them: perhaps stories, memories, self-perceptions. There is a meaning to everything, whether simple or complex.

And perhaps by the end of it, he will know what title he would give himself, here on the network. )

Comments

Text - un: Uravity (gently threadjacks for great justice)

[floatsaway]

A building is probably too heavy, and USUALLY half buried in the ground, but I can throw a car or two.
Maybe three. (￣▽￣)b

I can't drink, but I'll gladly take some ice cream or snacks if all it takes is hitting someone!!
I'll even let you choose where. ʕ •ᴥ• ʔ

Also I'm with him because he's #1 in all categories:
Looks, smarts, kisses, cooking, fighting, etc.
And I deserve the best of the best cuz I'm so cute.

[faceblocks]

three cars? that's worth ice cream and snacks.

what am choosing: where to take u or where you sling that car? ;)

u got a few points there
ill take ur word on the kissing
(and maybe the smarts and fighting too but just cause i like giving him shit)

he never told me he could cook
that one hurts me right in my bones
and my stomach
BETRAYAL

u do sound pretty cute

[floatsaway]

Yeah, if they're each about 2.5 tons, it'd be no problem.
My maximum weight capacity is about 10.

Why not both? ;P

Don't underestimate him. He may make noise like a cute little doggy, but Bakugou's actually really skilled.
He's in the top of of class back home, I think number 3, but that's ONLY for test scores and general academics. Everything else I'd definitely say he's #1.

OH MY GOSH HE COOKS LIKE A PRO IT'S LIKE RESTAURANT QUALITY EVERY TIME. ٩(♡ε♡)۶
u should see his knife skills, too, he can dice up veggies super duper fast and not even nick himself.
i can cook good, but Bakugou's just insane. idk where he got that kind of crazy skill, but i don't complain cuz i get to eat well when he makes dinner or breakfast. (っ˘ڡ˘ς)
The ONLY bad thing is he likes his food stupid spicy, and I can't handle all that much spice, so I kind of want to cry when he puts too much in mine.

Omg...i'm really not, it was just a joke. (*/ω＼)
But thank you.
I bet you're not nearly as bad as he probably says you are.

[detonating]

COUCH OR DEATH

YOUR CHOICE

[FOR SO MANY REASONS JFC]

[floatsaway]

[There may or may not be laughing from somewhere in the house...]

Bakugou, you go to bed at 8:30 and the latest 9pm...
You'll already be dead asleep by the time I'm finished brushing my teeth. ( ¬3¬ )

I'll just sneak in with you.

[detonating]

[Bitch he will fight you!!!!!]

I fucking hear you in there

Eat shit 🖕👎
You really think I don't have enough spite to stay up and make sure you can't get in bed with me, dumbass?

[floatsaway]

[BIG LOUD FART NOISE.]

That one was for you. ♥

Then I'll just carry you to the couch with me like the spoiled princess you try so hard to act like. (˘∀˘)
Or we can rock, paper, scissors.

picks a different pissed icon

[detonating]

Sounds like you went and shit yourself. Great job. Keep it.

CALL ME THAT AGAIN YOU FUCKING SPACE CADET
SEE WHAT HAPPENS

[Flirting in public. How many people are watching and wondering what the fuck is wrong with them???]

LMFAO i love his angry faces

[floatsaway]

You give me shit all the time, Bakugou, I'm only returning the favor.

Princess Kacchannel Bakugou D'ynamight Murderolo Explosiva VII!!
Ruler of the Boom Boom Kingdom! °˖✧◝(⁰▿⁰)◜✧˖°

[She may or may not be hiding somewhere in the house now, for fear of a surprise attack. But whatever, the network can bear witness to these two chucklefucks in love.]

[abornfighter]

LOL

[Nothing of substance to add, she just thinks it's hilarious that this is his response to his girlfriend gushing over him.]

[detonating]

[She had to have known this was coming...]

SHUT THE FUCK UP KARATE GIRL

[abornfighter]

Sorry, too busy laughing at how much of a dork you're being over your girlfriend praising you.

[detonating]

YOU KNOW WHAT I HATE MORE THAN THAT SAPPY BULLSHIT?

[He doesn't hate it. He just THINKS he does because it makes him feel all warm and like there are butterflies fucking up his insides... and THAT is SO fucking lame and cheesy.]

PEOPLE STICKING THEIR NOSES IN MY GODDAMN BUSINESS

[abornfighter]

It's posted publicly where EVERYONE can see your goddamn business, Pomeranian.

[faceblocks]

holy shit
im down for dodging a car if u wanna fling one this way sometime
we can get snacks after and bakugou can also get snacks (or drinks w/e) if he stuffs his mouth w/food he cant complain as much
ok he CAN probably itll just take longer

huh. wouldnt be the first time i underestimated someone so yeah i can see it
would never have guessed he was a smarty pants AND a smartass but hey like u said why not both

now i gotta hit him up for cooking tip
i also like the SPICE

nah i bet u are id bet a blood stone on it
and lunch

i might be that bad who knows
(im not)
at this point i kinda take it as a compliment XD

[floatsaway]

hahaha
Maybe start small first with a motorbike or something.
Actually, I do need to do some weight training one of these days...and I bet he'd like to train his explosions a bit more, too.
We have a place to do that, actually, if you wanna join us...pretty sure it even has beds and a kitchen. We can make him cook for us!! (´▽`)

Oh yeah, he's actually really smart. It's a little surprising with his attitude, right?
He acts like a delinquent, but he's actually a HUGE dork!

Oh no...not you too.
Maybe we shouldn't eat together, then.
I don't think my stomach can handle it...

[Or her poor asshole, but you know. Not...gonna put that out in public.]

[faceblocks]

YES
i mean u had me at training but now theres food
so i cant say no

i could but that would be so so stupid

i get it
its a perception thing right?
which
i mean if anything it gives him something else to brag loudly about
rub in peoples faces

like MY BRAIN CAN KICK UR BRAINS ASS or some shit

im also cool with no spice
mostly im cool with food thats not a flavorless brick
or slop
but id take slop over bread so hard it could dent a wall

my sworn sister doesnt like that kind of spice much either
i dont rag her about it
so i wont rag u

[floatsaway]

Hahaha, I can cook too, but I'm not as good as he is.
Though I have a few family recipes even Bakugou has 'praised', too.

lolol don't tell him that, cuz he absolutely would lord it over most people.
Maybe not AS much as he used to, but...he definitely likes being the best at stuff.
HAHAHA buuuuut I still get the better test results on physics and science. SOMETIMES math. Those are my two best subjects.

Oh, haha, then you'll be fine with our foods!! I like sweets mostly, but I also like a lot of savory foods, too.
And salty snacks are the best to just mindlessly munch. Rice crackers with soy sauce flavor and nori are soooo yummy. ♥ and cheap!!
Σ(°ロ°)
Weaponized bread...

Hahaha I appreciate it.
I can take a little bit, and he's tried to slip me spicy foods to build up my tolerence to it, too.
I think I can handle maybe level 3 now? Which isn't much, but I used to only be level 1 before... (°▽°);;

Hey, tell me a food you like, and I'll see if me or Bakugou can make it!!

[faceblocks]

i can only make a couple things
not amazing but like good enough ppl eat it and dont spit it into their hand and feed it to the dogs

everyone likes being good at stuff
some people just like it a whole lot more
and their kinda assy about it HA

my sisters a smarty too even if she doesnt act like it
shed probably be rly good at those things if we had school

im sure youve heard the jokes
SOMEONE like to call me prison tats
when hes feeling xtra nice
but its true what they say about prison food

level 3 is 2 levels above 1 so
thats improvement
look at me maybe i can do a little math

im fine with all the foods
havent met one yet i didnt like
if it sounds like a challenge thats bc it is

so far i like fish
fried fish
noodles
noodles with fish
also with sauce
the spicy the sweet all the sauce
chips
fried potatoes fried mushrooms fried eggs scrambled eggs
BREAD
eggs
eggs on bread
crabcakes
crab salad
dried mushrooms dried fish dried meat
cheetos
that wiggly candy that tastes like fruit
ice cream
cookies (every kind ive tried)
cake
prob shoulda listed what i dont like bc wow

OH
ok so i did think of one food i dont like but theres context i promise
its gross
so gross
and i noped the fuck out
its beast corpses

[detonating]

YO

GET YOUR OWN FUCKING GIRLFRIEND, LOSER

[faceblocks]

YO

NOT LOOKING, NERD

im a lot of things but id never try and take someones lady
besides look at all that shit she said about you

SMARTY PANTS

[detonating]

YOU SENT HER A WINKY FACE WHILE ASKING HER WHERE TO GO AND CALLED HER CUTE
THAT LOOKS A WAY, FUCKING SUE ME


&Yeah I know. Shut up.
Shit's gonna give me cavities.
And make me throw up in my mouth.

[faceblocks]

theres acknowledging
and then theres LOOKING

and if shes cute shes cute thems the breaks
if u want i can call u cute too

then no cavities but prob more puke

[detonating]

She's cute as hell but it's fucking weird to sit around and talk about it with other people????

[RIGHT?? THAT'S WEIRD ISN'T IT??
HE IS SO FUCKING NEW TO THIS.]

You fucking do that and I'll break your goddamn nose and then puke.

[faceblocks]

itd be weirder to never mention it to anyone
now she sees right here on the network how much she fucking means
thats a big deal and i bet it feels pretty great

[guess who's gonna call you cute when they meet you on that beach. it's worth the broken nose just for the reaction.]