haru | 🐇 | ハル (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
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deernet2021-10-19 12:25 pm
hopticulture) wrote in deernet2021-10-19 12:25 pm
text | un: moonmochi
It's strange. There was a lot I wanted to do before I turned twenty.
It doesn't feel wrong to have been brought here, but I wish I wasn't by myself. I remember wanting to spend today with people I cared about, but that's not possible anymore.
[someone is very clearly brooding & feeling the effects of Cloverfield.]
People tend to roll their eyes whenever a girl talks about her feelings in a vague way for everyone to read, but if I didn't say anything about today, I'd probably feel much worse.
It doesn't feel wrong to have been brought here, but I wish I wasn't by myself. I remember wanting to spend today with people I cared about, but that's not possible anymore.
[someone is very clearly brooding & feeling the effects of Cloverfield.]
People tend to roll their eyes whenever a girl talks about her feelings in a vague way for everyone to read, but if I didn't say anything about today, I'd probably feel much worse.
no subject
[the hell??/??? she's thrown off just enough that her Intense Lonely Feelings subsides a bit.]
Not many people like women who are direct. Not many people like women who are vague either. I'm not sure why exactly, but there are more expectations for women than there are men in the way we're supposed to act, and when we're difficult, we're disliked.
no subject
[SEE? YOU'RE WELCOME.]
I see. I think people struggle to speak the truth. They say nice things instead of what they actually feel. I like it when they're direct. But most of the women I've met were more direct than the men.
no subject
And you say you like people when they're direct but, how did you feel about those women that you met. Did you like them? Want to spend time with them?
[she's curious, because a lot of men dropped her like a hot potato whenever she didn't fit their fantasy of her.]
no subject
Well, three were my superior officers, so perhaps their directness is part of their jobs. Still, one is a famous scientist and the other creates strategies that hold the line between humans and enemies.
As for the other two, one yelled at me when I tried to explain how to be a better pilot. However, she was in a poor state of mind. The other... our relationship is complicated because we were created in similar ways but we are quite different. Still, her determination is respectable.
Though in the end, it was not part of my role to make friends.