deernet | video; un: padlocks

I have made my warning to a handful of you before, but there are many that I've yet to meet. And so, this is primarily to those who do not know me.

I am something to be wary of. 'Tis not meant as a threat, but a matter of what I am. Call it what you shall, be it a curse or condition, but the brand on my head is not for display only. Many would call me an abomination where I am from, and it is not far from the truth.

I fight back the instincts of a demon inside of me. I hold it back by whatever means I am able, with my will and the bonds I take with me. With years of practice, I am typically able to hold it back, but there can never be a promise of my willpower. If there comes a time in which this beast emerges and I transform, I do not expect mercy on my behalf.

I understand that there are some with a similar situation as myself, or that you have experienced enough horrors to be prepared for it. Making demands of a person is impossible, I know that, but I want to be clear that I am a thing to be careful with.

...Thank you for listening. Be well, friends and strangers alike.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

We wash ashore with so little, I think it is easier to recognize how much we need each other. [A little ironic coming from a guy who's playing keep-away from a lot of the community himself.

But it didn't make it any less true.]

Still, it is much warmer than many places I have been. It helps, some ways, that we do not know each other and are all from very different worlds; our old prejudices, these all become illegible here.

[...Well, almost. He'd had one remarkable incident already that--fortunately--solved itself with an explanation.

But it was better not to lie even by kindly omission.] Or, mostly, I should say. Some do translate, I have found. But these, they can be negotiated.

Where I was last, hope and charity were so uncommon. People could barely work together. Many degraded into savagery, selfishness, or fanatics. Even what comrades I had, sometimes it felt like our party was held together by mere threads. This... is so very different.

In any case, you are correct. Our old lives impact little here, for the most part. If anything, I pray my experiences prepare us for what lies ahead.

[That's an old story, too. Unseen on his side of the connection, Illarion winces in sympathy.] That is, too, a place I have been. I am glad for your sake you are here now.

Might I ask of the place you came from? If this would not be too much a blight on your current mood. [Though they hadn't been associated all that long, Illarion would have to be more than blind to not notice Bigby was not a happy creature by nature. (Who would be, with that nature?)]

And for yours as well, friend.

I could share, albeit so little of it would be uplifting. More that I am concerned for your well-being if I were to share. You're certain you want to listen?

I'm certain. Pain shared is pain halved, is it not?

Though you are kind to consider me, my shoulders are broad; this is a thing I willingly bear.

I've no doubt you can do so capably.

Very well. What would you like to know?

How did your world come to be in its state? Were people there always as you describe, untrusting and hopeless, or did it fall from something gentler?

There were always imperfections. Primarily, the nobilities dominated over the lower class, living lavishly through their personal pleasures and hedonism. A tale as old as time. Once, the spread of corruption was slower. Known, but not so rampant throughout the world.

But the less fortunate were not husks of their former selves. They struggled, true, but there were enough people once to want to help them. The church brought people hope, and I wanted my studies to aid the unfortunate.

I'm not certain of all the changes that happened. I was... gone from the world for many decades, after my affliction and I was turned in. [He pauses a moment, looking troubled for a moment before going on:] It is said that there was a man who became obsessed with attempting to understand what was beyond the veil. By doing so, it accelerated the corruptions across the land, bringing ruin. Something lurks beyond, poisoning our lives, changing people horribly.

I suppose in a way, I am more fortunate than some who was lost to their changes.

video; un: padlocks

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