un: timaeusTestified | text | Birthday Boy

[givehead]

Turning 21 has been a completely underrated experience. I was expecting the blackout and loss of time. Even the warping to a new place isn't out of the realm of estimated probability.

But being genetically altered is a plot twist. I assume it is so we can fuck the monsters.

I call dibs on the raven dude.

cw: looots of kink/fetish/nsfw jokes/conversation going on in this here post.

Comments

[wannasmash]

You must really like robots. I only really use them for training.

[ While paying no mind to their grumblings about humans being inferior. He half wonders if some teacher didn't program that as a joke. ]

So do people also have skewed opinions of you? Leave you offerings you don't like?

[ He said he was a god, after all... ]

[givehead]

I do. I was raised by them. They were my only means of socialization for most of my life.

I have Brobot here though. He's great for training if you ever want to give him a go. What kind of training do you do?

(He thinks about that carefully, like, actually seriously thinks about that question in full.)

Yes. Not too many offerings though.

[wannasmash]

[ There's a bit of delay before he messages back. He'd only meant to glance at the first comment and see what Kyle, someone he's spoken to before, has to say about this wild stuff. His eyes skid hurriedly past the really personal details out of respect. But he can tell Kyle is upset. Random surface-level jabs are one thing, but when it comes to someone slinging deep cuts about someone else, Midoriya is easily riled. He's even been baited before by someone who knew this about him.

He forgot what they were talking about and has to take the time to reread. It doesn't matter; he doesn't answer most of his message anyway. His immediate agitation has ebbed, but gone are the uhs, maybes, and I guesses. ]

Robots don't make good socialization.

Leave Kyle-san alone.

[givehead]

(Well that's an unexpected swerve. Dirk has his own delay, staring thoughtfully at the text glaring back at him. Dirk had been pretty mean to Kyle. Brutal, even, and this guy must be one of his pals. The defense is honorable and admittedly, Dirk respects that.)

They don't.

He's dealing with the consequences of his actions. He's fine.

[wannasmash]

[ The funny part is that Midoriya hardly knows Kyle. He knows it's none of his business. It's probably going to look meaningless, stupid, and embarrassing. He's done it before and been called those things before.

He is, as they say, back on his bullshit. ]

Sure he might be fine. But you went too far. Kyle-san isn't your brother. That's obvious, right? So don't compare them.

[givehead]

Do you have a brother?

Why shouldn't I compare them?

[wannasmash]

No. But I definitely understand wanting to protect someone. That's still no excuse for saying those things.

Because they're different people. [ He said it was obvious... He tries to explain: ] A lot of people here in Trench have told me that a new person can never be the same as the old one back home, but they can be just as special.

[givehead]

You do not understand my relationships or what they mean to me specifically though. Don't pretend that you do. My brother's happiness is imperative and I would do a lot worse than bully some dork online for him to keep that happiness for taking his boyfriend. He might not be here, but I'm not going to insult his memory by not beefing a little for his sake.

I could have said a lot worse.

I'm being realistic. Replicants are rarely as good as the original.

(He would know. He's not even the original of himself anymore.)

We believe there are improvements, and maybe there are in some ways, but there will always be something missing.

Have you ever even been in love?

[wannasmash]

I'm not pretending anything. I get that you miss your brother. It's hard. I was a mess for a whole month after I arrived here. And it still hurts not to have a lot of the people I knew around. Every Sleeper I've met has come from a different world and would say the same. Maybe I don't understand. But I can't just watch you insult someone else like that.

So you weren't as much of a jerk as you could have been. That still makes you a jerk.

He's not a replacement or replicant or whatever. He's a person. Is that really what you're going to call any of the new friends you make here?

[ He can't put it into words, but it's the callous way Dirk describes people, as if they don't matter, that bothers him. Couldn't his brother's memory and basic decency coexist? He realizes he didn't even finish reading, and the last question catches him off guard. He gets why he's asking, but it seems so inconsequential compared to the rest. ]

No? Even if I have, would I really tell you about my love life??

[ He needs Dirk to insult hypothetical love interests like he needs another trip to the hospital. ]

this cr,,,is beautiful,,

[givehead]

It's really none of your business how I interact with other people. Kyle's not a child and he was capable of defending himself. He needs to build up his self-esteem and the only way that's going to happen is if someone forces him to do it.

Yeah, I'm a jerk. Congratulations on that brilliant observation.

Do I really seem like the type of person who makes friends in abundance?

(Listen, Dirk is extremely lonely, but he has zero social skills. Obviously. Midoriya isn't wrong in the slightest. There was a clinical detachment about Dirk and something cold about him that had led to him being swayed to the dark side in more than one timeline. The majority of timelines, actually.)

Then I don't see why you should stick your nose into something you have no personal comprehension of. You have no clue what it feels like to see someone you love with someone else and know that you weren't enough and would never be enough.

(Probably a smart move, let's be real.)

it's everything i ever wanted; also, hitting this thread with a ~~spoiler warning~~

[wannasmash]

[ Kyle had a rival in the past and is now dating Karkat. He probably defends himself way better than Midoriya. (Everyone defends themselves better than Midoriya. He's really only good at defending other people.) He doesn't care if it's none of his business. Giving help unasked for is what makes a hero. ]

Of course he would be. But he shouldn't have to do it just because you didn't have the strength to hold back. It was a low blow. That's not how making someone stronger works. I know the difference.

[ He learned that when his bully became his rival. Before, there was envy, inferiority, disgust, disrespect for each other and themselves. Afterwards, they learned not to hate what they lacked in themselves, but to learn from each other. ]

It's different when you respect someone. I don't mean like being polite. Having enough respect to give advice. Telling them their weaknesses and strengths. Keeping focus. Growing. Making each other better. Not attacking their self-esteem.

Are you talking about yourself?

[ He wouldn't think to ask, except he's become very familiar with his rival's insecurity and how it manifests. ]

Re: it's everything i ever wanted; also, hitting this thread with a ~~spoiler warning~~

[givehead]

(He's not wrong. Midoriya was giving off some serious vibes. It reminded him vaguely of Jake if Jake was a better person.)

I did hold back. I was being incredibly gentle. It's not my fault neither of you sees it that way. Everyone is different and everyone requires different guidance. What works for you doesn't work for everyone.

(Deku's not completely wrong, but Dirk was stubborn, and if he felt entitled to something? Yeah.

Also, he really was just kind of an asshole.)

I hardly attacked his self-esteem. I just told him facts about the situation he has put himself in.

I'm talking about anyone who has gone through that experience.

(AKA yes.)

[wannasmash]

Neither of us?

[ Dirk even admits that Kyle doesn't see it as being incredibly gentle. What the hell. ]

"Just" telling him facts, "just" sating he can't compare to someone else, "just" putting down something important to him, the first time you meet him. Gentle, right. Try asking Kyle-san what he wants. What works for you might not work for him.

[ If Dirk is going to be cagey about that really specific example of a love life in shambles, it's fine. Midoriya threw manners out the window already, but he will allow him that dignity. ]

Figure out your own problems first.

[givehead]

Okay, so what. Do you want me to apologize?

It's pretty evident what he wants.

(Thanks bro. He really appreciates that.)

Can't fix what you don't have.

(Which sounds avoidant of the conversation, but he's being literal here. He didn't have a romantic life right now, and his romantic problems weren't even in this world.)

I kind of respect your spunk, dude.

[wannasmash]

[ Because it's text, he can't tell if Dirk is being rhetorical or actually asking him for his opinion. But he'll give it. ]

Yeah. I can't say for sure how the two of you feel about apologies, but if you start with one, it's easier to talk. That's just the start really.

[ He doesn't know if Kyle would appreciate an apology or feel embarrassed. He also doesn't know if Dirk would be sincere and make good on it in the future. But he does know, from personal experience, that even a years-long conflict can be solved starting with communication. This is, thankfully, less dire than that.

Dirk's past might be in another world, but Midoriya saw that it still affects him. He can't fix a relationship that doesn't exist, but he can fix how he learns from it as a person. Midoriya thinks he's being avoidant but already decided not to press it. ]

A person shouldn't have to get in a fight with you on the internet to be respected.

[givehead]

(Shit. No. The similarity to Jake really was getting to him. He could feel the slightest crack of guilt and he hated himself for it. Jake wasn't even here and he was still managing to haunt every choice he made. Jake never made you a better version of yourself, so why do you keep expecting him to fix what can never be fixed? Stop expecting guys to fix you. It's pathetic.

Dirk realizes belatedly that it's been a few minutes since he has responded, and his fight has left him entirely.)

Do you think I really hurt him? Genuinely?

(Shit. He wasn't supposed to care. But he did. He slides a hand through his hair, sighing quietly. Fucking...God damn optimists. This guy could have gone for his own low-hanging fruit, but didn't bother. That did make Midoria better.)

I'm not respecting you because you got into a fight with me on the internet. I'm respecting you for not backing down over something you feel strongly about. It's cool.



I will apologize to him.

[wannasmash]

[ Midoriya would never have been able to put anything into words if he hadn't grown exponentially over the past year. Last year, Bakugou felt free to say whatever terrible thing came to mind to him. Midoriya felt upset and angry, but he couldn't say anything back. Not a word. He just stood there, arms glued to his sides, shaking as he was left alone in the classroom.

He is a very different person now. They both are. ]

Yes, but I can't speak for him. He'd be the best person to tell you after you apologize. It might be awkward, but it'll be OK.