[ text ] | un: eggmagnet

[halfdecay]

annual squid weather report: its shit. don't come out.

ps - can we all agree that the twat with the red pinecone for a head is a melodramatic bellend? or is that just me?

take it to the PMs bruv.

[alright, good chat. glad we got that out in the air.]

Comments

text || un: dito

[syncopathic]

was that meant to be indecipherable or do you have some sort of brain damage?

if it's the former, fuck you. if it's the latter, please hurry up and die from it so we're spared any more of your yammering.

[You would not believe how long it took to send this message. You'd better appreciate it, Owen.]

[halfdecay]

yeah, sorry about that. let me translate that for you.

ouyay areyay ayay ickheadday

[syncopathic]

[That most assuredly would have been an amazing burn had Pig Latin existed where Dito came from.]

so that's a yes to the brain damage, then.

don't worry, nothing being smothered with a pillow wouldn't fix.

[halfdecay]

That's a lovely invitation. Afraid I'll have to give it a pass, though.
Typically I liked to be wine & dined before getting smothered.

[syncopathic]

oh so you're one of THOSE freaks, huh. typical. do you like having your balls crushed too because you'd fit right in with this other guy I know.

[Says the guy who literally gets off to thoughts of turning people inside out.]

[halfdecay]

I'm afraid that's on a need to know basis. But don't let me get in the way of your kinky fantasy. I hear the brothel down the street is quite nice.

[syncopathic]

is that the one your mother works at? I heard they're offering a special right now. two bouts of gonorrhea for the price of one.

[halfdecay]

Is that why the townspeople keep saying not to mind the smell when you're around? Double the smegma, double the fun.

[syncopathic]

[Oh, he likes you.]

and here I thought they were wearing masks to shield themselves from your awful halitosis. probably should get that checked out, you know-- breath that bad's got to point to a serious medical ailment.

little word of advice? if you're going to eat that much ass you might want to brush your teeth afterwards.