video; un: v | cw for creepy dolls i guess?

[mehanizovati]

[the video starts focused on a shelf, and on that shelf is a doll. absolutely the kind that just exudes 'listed on ebay for having the spirit of an angry victorian child in it' vibes with its dead eyes.

when viktor speaks his tone could not be more dry.] Some of you might have noticed the unpleasant dolls that, when ignored instead of bought, come to life violently. This is a matter our household is not entirely aware of because Palamedes continues to gladly buy any unpleasant doll he sets his sights upon.

[offscreen, but not like, very far offscreen (it is not a big living space), palamedes chimes in with a pointed, 'While I respect your aesthetic tastes, you're wrong, they're delightful,' that viktor will pointedly ignore as he continues.]

He will not stop bringing them. Some of them vanish after a week or two. He calls this one Sensible Bethany.

['She calls herself that, actually, I explained this already,' from the peanut gallery. the camera shifts as viktor turns to address him back]

Is this entire place not haunted enough without ugly dolls, I ask again? There is a limit, Palamedes.

[in the unfocused corner of the camera the doll absolutely turns its head to stare directly at the screen.]

Comments

[eudaimonikos]

Oh, yeah. Don't ask me why, exactly - I'm pretty sure humans used to like them.

[megatheorem]

I was definitely about to ask why. I've never seen a real clown before; this picture I've conjured up just looks like colorful, friendly face paint. Not too sure about the shoes.

[eudaimonikos]

I'm not sure. There was a book, or a movie, about a killer clown that got big for a while, but I think they were considered scary before that. That's why it was in the book to begin with.

[megatheorem]

A killer clown.

[....]

I suppose if somebody really didn't like children, and made exceedingly poor career choices... I don't know; it seems silly to me. I think my doll is supposed to be some kind of 'angel,' are those terrifying, too?

[eudaimonikos]

I think the clown in the book was secretly an alien. Or a demon, or a spider.

[All three? He didn't actually consume any of the related media!]

Angels just sort of suck. All the ones I've ever met were the sort of people who like to act like they care about everyone a lot, but don't actually do anything for anyone.

[megatheorem]

I think I could object to a clown-spider. Wholeheartedly.

[The other two are probably fine? Yeah.]

As for the angels, is that a self-serving inaction or a 'helpless idiot' inaction?

[eudaimonikos]

Honestly? Hard to say. I think a lot of them were...incredibly incompetent and hiding it, but after a while that is just self-serving.

[megatheorem]

After a while. [hmm...] I believe it. Even a powerful mind has a limit on how long it can pretend to be something else, probably. You've met a lot of angels?

[eudaimonikos]

More than most. I took over doing their jobs for them. In theory we were working together, for a while, but they never actually did anything.

[megatheorem]

And you're not an angel or a human, by process of elimination, so are you going to make me ask? Now I'm curious.

[eudaimonikos]

I feel like you did just ask.

[.....]

I'm a demon, though.

[megatheorem]

I might have asked. I haven't met any demons before; honestly, I don't know if they exist where I'm from, but I've been wrong in the past.

I'm just human. Well, necromancer, but people make snap judgments about that around here. No 'zombies.'

[eudaimonikos]

[Michael shrugs.]

Humans in my world don't do magic. Not real magic, anyway. I don't have any expectations - though if there were necromancers in our world, I might have to fight them!

[megatheorem]

What's the not-real-magic that they do, then? Are there cards involved? I've heard of 'tarot.'

You can fight the other necromancers from my world, if you're bored. I'll politely pass.

[eudaimonikos]

Yeah, stuff like that. Stage magic is fun, but a lot of it is just a form of conning people.

[Michael waves a hand.]

As long as you aren't stealing my humans, I guess it's fine.

[megatheorem]

I have no idea what stage magic is. Unless— [he snaps his fingers a few times, hm-] Was there any at the new year's party, eons ago? I only kind of remember that night.

And which humans are yours? Not that I steal people by design, but I don't want to step on toes.

[Also, it kind of sounds like a joke to him, so...]

[eudaimonikos]

Yeah! I did some there, actually, it was fun!

[Has real magic; thinks stage magic is super cool!]

Any of the dead ones under my purview. I'm not...against people coming back to life in theory, I suppose, but I don't think it would be good for them to be yanked back and forth like that. Especially after they've been in the afterlife for a while. Anyway, they're my responsibility, I can't just let them get kidnapped!

[megatheorem]

Did you? I should have had fewer drinks.

[And... hmm. Being a twice-revived individual himself, he has plenty of feelings about this topic, all of them, for lack of a better term, grave.]

No, I think you're right. That's a lot of stress for a human mind to go through. I hope your people are doing well.

[eudaimonikos]

They should be. I left my best friend in charge when I came here - she's honestly a lot smarter than I am, she'll be great.

[megatheorem]

Oh, lucky. My best friend is still in the sea, but I like to think she's formulating some kind of grand plan down there.

So, for the sake of asking: your humans are from Earth, is that right?

[eudaimonikos]

Yeah. Just the one version of it, though.

[megatheorem]

What do you mean, the one version? [this is terrible what the fuck earth] How many versions are there?

[eudaimonikos]

Well, it's an infinite multiverse, so...infinity!

[megatheorem]

Okay. That answers a nonzero number of questions, which I'm going to consider a victory under nebulous criteria.

[...]

Does your version of 'Mercury' have people on it?

[eudaimonikos]

No, it's pretty much just a rock. Unless that's where the angels ended up going. It's boring there, but they were boring people.