video; un: v | cw for creepy dolls i guess?

[mehanizovati]

[the video starts focused on a shelf, and on that shelf is a doll. absolutely the kind that just exudes 'listed on ebay for having the spirit of an angry victorian child in it' vibes with its dead eyes.

when viktor speaks his tone could not be more dry.] Some of you might have noticed the unpleasant dolls that, when ignored instead of bought, come to life violently. This is a matter our household is not entirely aware of because Palamedes continues to gladly buy any unpleasant doll he sets his sights upon.

[offscreen, but not like, very far offscreen (it is not a big living space), palamedes chimes in with a pointed, 'While I respect your aesthetic tastes, you're wrong, they're delightful,' that viktor will pointedly ignore as he continues.]

He will not stop bringing them. Some of them vanish after a week or two. He calls this one Sensible Bethany.

['She calls herself that, actually, I explained this already,' from the peanut gallery. the camera shifts as viktor turns to address him back]

Is this entire place not haunted enough without ugly dolls, I ask again? There is a limit, Palamedes.

[in the unfocused corner of the camera the doll absolutely turns its head to stare directly at the screen.]

Comments

un: eudaimonikos; voice

[eudaimonikos]

Could be worse. It's not a clown doll.

[mehanizovati]

Gods, do not give him ideas. I do not need a clown ghost here on top of it all.

it's 4 feet away action

[megatheorem]

[Does Palamedes consider picking up his omni to reply to this post? Yes, a little. He does not, however, if only because it's on the other side of the bunker and he can defend doll honor just fine from here.]

Dolls can't possibly be your limit.

[Now he comes in closer than 4 feet, to plunk his chin on Viktor's shoulder and loop an arm around his waist from behind. Hi, don't judge his dolls, this is a distraction tactic.]

Maybe Rio could play with them. [...] Not the ceramic ones.

un: warden; voice

[megatheorem]

[know that he had to trenchgoogle what a clown is]

Is a "clown" supposed to be more haunted by default...?

[mehanizovati]

[the omni goes off because he is trying to silence pal's wisdom apparently. he is also instantly distracted so the underhanded tactics are truly being thrown around everywhere.]

Oh, if they were my limit they would have magically disappeared much earlier, I promise you. You are simply not getting away without being shamed for your questionable taste and how I am subjected to it.

[still leaning his head against pal's so like. really making a point, dude.] No, she'll end up cursed. And if she did you would be beside yourself because I am fairly certain you are her favorite and vice versa. I am just the middle man.

[eudaimonikos]

Oh, yeah. Don't ask me why, exactly - I'm pretty sure humans used to like them.

[megatheorem]

You'd disappear my dolls just like that? Devious! Anyway, you said don't bring them to the lab, and I only have so many places to put them.

[Distraction tactic: super effective. He scoffs, like, please? He could rescue Rio from a curse. Also, the dolls love him.]

She is my favorite... big, pink lizard creature. You've got me there. Neither of you is getting cursed by my stuff as long as I'm here, come on. Have more faith than that.

[megatheorem]

I was definitely about to ask why. I've never seen a real clown before; this picture I've conjured up just looks like colorful, friendly face paint. Not too sure about the shoes.

[mehanizovati]

I would have sighed and said 'ah, it must be some trick of the Trench.' It would have been a perfect crime.

[sigh, but instead here they are.] At least you have good taste in some areas. As long as- [a pause and he glances at bethany, sounding more annoyed than anything as he gestures.] You see! She is doing it again. Turning her head when we are not looking, she is a- a show off.

video; un: lady

[dohaeris]

[sansa, a former creepy statue, looks entirely too sympathetic to the cause of the creepy dolls. she did try to help them when she saw them, and even offered them a piece of seamstress chalk to write out any messages while she closed her eyes. they largely accepted this as payment and went away, but she was prepared to offer them positions as gargoyles and companions to her lamp friends. the real concern is the lingering haunted dolls. it doesn't seem healthy for anyone involved.]

It's very kind to take the little statues home. Are the other dolls truly haunted by ghosts?

[megatheorem]

Viktor, you can't blame everything on Trench tricks, you'll ruin my spreadsheets. [Or, worse: he'll have to make a new spreadsheet, one that keeps track of every time Viktor invents a fake Trench trick, and then it would be in writing forever. See. Dangerous line to toe.

He glances over to Bethany, eyebrows raised.]

You put her on camera, she's entitled to a bit of showmanship. She's as harmless as the old man in the Sanctuary, you know.

[mehanizovati]

[everyone is team creepy dolls it seems. viktor just does not appreciate their menacing charm.]

Eh, it is hard to say. Palamedes can sense it but I have no doubt he'd tell me one was haunted when it wasn't because he finds it funny.

There was very much the haunted pen at sanctuary so I suppose it's quite likely such things happen here.

[mehanizovati]

Watch me, I will wreak havoc on the statistics for my own gain. [chaotic academia, dark academia, etc.

mostly he's just having a staring contest with sensible bethany now, which is just his entire life in a nutshell these days.] I suppose she has the good taste not to bleed or make a mess. 'Sensible' indeed. I am going to throw a rag over her if she doesn't stop with the staring.

[eudaimonikos]

I made up this whole series of clown-centric art one time. Paintings, mostly, but there were some sculptures as well.

[eudaimonikos]

I'm not sure. There was a book, or a movie, about a killer clown that got big for a while, but I think they were considered scary before that. That's why it was in the book to begin with.

[megatheorem]

What gain? Triumph over dolls? Making me cross?

['Cross' here meaning, of course, 'kind of fussy,' but details. He gives Viktor's waist an affectionate squeeze right now, very crossly indeed, and raises his other hand in front of his eyes. Don't look at her, sir.]

You're encouraging her, you realize. Besides, she's stuck in that doll, what else is she going to do besides look at us? She's bored.

[megatheorem]

A killer clown.

[....]

I suppose if somebody really didn't like children, and made exceedingly poor career choices... I don't know; it seems silly to me. I think my doll is supposed to be some kind of 'angel,' are those terrifying, too?

[mehanizovati]

I suppose I should apologize in case you are an eh... enthusiast but truly, with my whole heart I must ask why?

[mehanizovati]

Personal satisfaction. [so both of those. he looks preemptively smug about it.

he sighs at being torn from his staring contest with a ghost. the real question here is if bethany likes fucking with him or genuinely thinks he's fun and this is all a game. who knows.]

Then get her enrichment. What are those boards, the one that get people killed? With the letters? Eh... spirit boards? Get her that. Or give some to the teens and let her near them so she can menace them with cryptic messages.

[megatheorem]

[Wow... this guy... Palamedes scoffs and pokes Viktor in the forehead with his thumb, petulantly. Don't be smug.]

I have no idea what you're talking about. Spirit boards that kill people? With letters? [they don't have ouija on mercury viktor] A— keyboard that stabs you...?

[That sounds stupid. What is this enrichment.]

I'm not letting them near her or someone is going to get hurt, and I'm not taking responsibility.

[eudaimonikos]

I was torturing someone with them.

[He says like that's a normal thing!]

I was particularly proud of her bedroom doors. They were sliding - when you closed them, they'd form a giant picture of a clown while playing circus music. There were child cheers at the end. Really awful to witness!

[mehanizovati]

You have not heard of them? Truly? [surely ouji boards are necromancer-core. admittedly viktor thinks they're stupid so he's delighted to pull up his omni, taking pal's wrist to pull it down away from his eyes so he can see.

his passing wrist does get a kiss, so that's gay. after a bit of typing he brings up the image of a ouji board and holds it up for pal to see.]

These. It is a children's game, yes? Everyone puts their fingers lightly on the planchet and pretend to talk to ghosts while someone moves it and pretends they are not. Or I suppose in this case an actual ghost would move it.

[eudaimonikos]

I think the clown in the book was secretly an alien. Or a demon, or a spider.

[All three? He didn't actually consume any of the related media!]

Angels just sort of suck. All the ones I've ever met were the sort of people who like to act like they care about everyone a lot, but don't actually do anything for anyone.

[mehanizovati]

[well.

it takes him a moment to admit,] That is rather ingenious, really. Hostile architecture brought to a truly unfortunate conclusion. Why was she being treated to this exactly?

[megatheorem]

[Hmm, that is gay, very nice. Palamedes drops his hand to join the other, both arms around Viktor's waist now. This children's board game is like necromancy for babies, huh! Kind of cute.]

I can't imagine what entertainment someone would get out of pretending there are ghosts in the room. [no one here has ever done that, particularly not about which dolls are actually haunted. he totally doesn't get it.] Tell me you can see why having a children's game around is a little redundant for me.

[Please, what is he, an amateur.] Still; she's already here. They don't need a board.