video | un: sharpshooter

[azurestar]

( Content Warnings: discussion of death, trauma/ptsd, past torture, psychosis, mental health crisis )

[The video opens up on Lance in the arena at The Gate breathing heavily, there's a bleeding bullet wound through his left shoulder and a bruise forming on one cheek. It's clear, he didn't start this video by the angle that it's being filmed at and how he's bent over with his hands on his knees. Those who have discovered Omens can double as phones may figure out that is how this is being filmed. On some level Lance wants to share this moment and his omen answered his subconscious mental command.

In the corner of the screen there is a black smoke floating in the air, dissipating but forming what looks like a... middle finger? Lance then leans down and picks up Reaper's mask off what remains of his corpse and looks at it. Then he speaks to Reaper's remains, his voice sounding rough and in a weird sort of shock.]

For two years I thought I deserved what you did to me, that it was my fault. You tortured me... for hours. [He takes in a shuddering breath holding the mask tight and shaking.] Then you suffocated me to death with your body's smoke and you've haunted my dreams ever since... But Moira- Moira told me it wasn't my fault, that... the nightmare took over my mind and made me hurt her. You knew it too, but you did that to me anyway. Funny how it took killing you for me to realize maybe she was right and you were wrong.

[He practically snarls the last part and then turns to face his omen and sees it's broadcasting something to someone. Now that he's snapped out of the shock of it all, he grins triumphantly at the "camera", the bloodsport high returning and he's devolving into a bit of a hysterical meltdown.] You hear that?! I, Lance, Paladin of Voltron, actually killed Reaper! The big, bad, scary smoke man in the stupid mask who killed me and Chloe is dead. And I conquered his ass! ME!

[He holds up the mask he took off Reaper's body like it's a both proof and a trophy.] I'm keeping this to remind myself I don't have to be afraid anymore. You guys should all totally try out killing your demons, it's great!

( ooc: lance is replying to all responses after he's had time to come back to a little bit more mental stability/coherency. )

Comments

Video; un: darkness

[survivalthroughhate]

[Maul listens as he can feel his hearts breaking inside of him. Though he's yet to be able to say it out loud, he's known for some told now he loves Reaper. It's hard enough to hear of his death by another Sleeper's hand on its own, but to then have the one that did it sit there publicly gloating over it? Every bit of self-control Maul has put into behaving himself the past three months goes out the window as his rage takes over.

When he speaks, his voice is in the same whisper soft tone that it always is, but the undercurrent of sheer malice and hatred there is enough to make his voice sound all the more eerie.]

Savor your victory while you can. Because when I come for you, by the end you're going to beg for death. I'm going to make you wish you'd never been born, you arrogant little maggot. I'm going to raze you, this town, and anyone who tries to get in my way to the ground!

[azurestar]

[Well he can't say he's surprised, but he also didn't foresee this. When Reaper goaded him into trying to kill him, he sort of lost all ability to think, though. He wants to not feel guilty, but he does because he has a soul and that pangs slightly when Maul's hurt is clear. But considering his history with both these men he's not that moved.]

I know how much it hurts to lose someone you care about so I get it. But I'm not sorry I killed a torturing murderer. He's gonna be back in a few days, though, and I'm pretty sure he'd just call us even.

text | carcinoGeneticist

[klawful]

HOLY SHIT.





THIS IS WAY FUCKING COOLER THAN SAVING THE UNIVERSE. I TAKE EVERYTHING BACK. YOU'RE NOT EVEN REMOTELY LAME. YOU ARE THE EXACT OPPOSITE OF LAME. YOU MIGHT ACTUALLY BE THE COOLEST PERSON EVER. SORRY. I AM SURE THIS IS A GENUINELY EMOTIONAL MOMENT FOR YOU AND I AM BY NO MEANS TRYING TO TRIVIALIZE THAT.

I'M JUST SAYING IT IS VERY ADMIRABLE TO EXACT SUCH *INTENSE* REVENGE.

[azurestar]

man, you've got some weird priorities
not sure i'd wanna list this under my 'cool resume' tbh

but thanks? I think

video; un: liontamer

[chickenchoicejudy]

[Ryan doesn't know any of these people, but he did meet Lance recently. This is apparently enough for him to feel justified in commenting on this.]

Dude, what the fuck?! You just killed somebody!

[azurestar]

[A blink and then an awkward rub of his neck. Seeing Luca's wordless video sobered him a bit.]

Yeah …look man, I've killed a lot of people. I'm a soldier, and it was a regular thing in The Nightmare for almost everyone. I feel bad about all of them… well, except this one.

…Okay, maybe I feel a little bad, because I'm not a psycho. But it's really hard to after what he did to my friend and to me. So, I guess I'm sorry you had to see that, but I'm not sorry I killed him.

video; un: TripleJ

[kyley_b]

...dude. DUDE. NOT FUCKING COOL!

[azurestar]

… which part?

video | un: alberich

[unmelting]

[He's run into Lance a couple times now, and this is very different than what he's seen so far. Hard not to pay attention in any case. And it's interesting.]

So you've settled an old score. I'm not entirely sure announcing it so broadly may be the wisest decision.

[But done is done and Kaeya would be lying to say his curiosity isn't entirely piqued.]

You're bleeding, you know. When the battle high fades, you might be in some trouble.

[Words like adrenaline and shock aren't really in his vocabulary given he's from a world with more healers than surgeons. But he still knows how that can go. He's seen knights under his command experience it.]

[azurestar]

Well, the announcement wasn't exactly planned. Valor decided on his own and I guess I just went with it.

[He gives the camera a bit of stink eye, but it's at the Omen, not Kaeya, of course. Then he looks momentarily vulnerable but shakes it off… this whole announcing one of your greatest traumas to the network is… a lot.]

Yeah, it's not too bad… I think. Are you a medic or something?

text | un: klapbak

[klussy]

im honestly surprised this didn't happen WAY sooner

you okay, man?

[azurestar]

it totally seems like something that should've happened several times over by now, huh

[He changes the privacy setting to locked.]

i've been better

[imaglyphwitch]

[As someone who has actually killed her demons and regretted it ever since, she didn't expect her reaction to be this swift, but it was].

What are you doing?!

You think a "good person" takes the thing from the offender like a trophy? Or brags about it on this like it's some amazing feat? You look crazy!

And what about the other Sleepers watching this?! Is that what you want to teach them, kill someone that wronged you and make it a show?

[azurestar]

[He replies to this after the mania has worn off enough to think. He grimaces, but she is a teenager. Still, it hits him in some sore spots and he's not fully back to 'center' in his head.]

Look, chica. I never said I was a good person. Or… a totally sane person. If I could've kept this off the network I would've, so I'm sorry it ended up like that but I'm not that sorry I killed him.

voice; un: shiro

[shiro2hero]

Lance-!?

[Because - what the hell can he say, what the hell can he do? It's done, it's horrifying - and - ]

[So many more reasons to hate that pile of smoke. In a way Shiro so rarely does.]

Lance - what - Just stay put, I'll come watch your back. [You know, with all the angry responses there...]

video

[azurestar]

Shiro, it's okay. I can handle it.

[He lets out a breath looking like he has the weight of the world on his shoulders.]

I don't want anyone else getting hurt over all this.

audio; un: doublehedgedsword

[laminae]

[Holy cow, this is a lot to take in, and Fern is having a lot of mixed emotions. Seeing Reaper, someone he likes, having been killed sends him into a spiraling anger. There's a voice in his head telling him to hunt Lance down and kill him for what he did, and it's really tempting... but if what Lance is saying is true, well... he can't really blame him for killing Reaper. If he was in his position he absolutely would've done the same thing. Taking his mask, though, that seems like a step too far.

And on top of it all, Lance's voice is reminding him so strongly of Finn that it makes his head hurt. It's so creepy and unsettling and even though it's just a coincidence that Lance sounds like him, Fern hates it. He really doesn't want to hear or think about Finn talking about getting tortured and killing someone he cares about and basically having a breakdown, it makes him feel a rush of anger and frustration and insecurity.]

Dude, why the flip would you put this up for all of us to see??

[azurestar]

[By this point he's pretty emotionally drained, and though he's answered the question before, it's probably valid. He recognizes Fern from the fever dream like experience when he was a dragon and he doesn't have it in him to get annoyed at answering this for the third time or something. How he feels about all this is pretty all over the map, conflicting is an understatement, it can be heard in the heaviness of his voice.]

Short answer: my omen started broadcasting me in the middle of a meltdown on its own.

un: trienemybest; video

[droptheious]

What the fuck, Lance?

[Varian didn't know Reaper's past in Deerington- only that it was sketchy- but it's not like his own past is exceptionally rosy either. He's done his best not to judge. But this is... well, it sure is a shitty-ass way of going about it. And he's WELL aware Maul will be on a rampage and probably backslide with all the hard work he's put into getting the man to improve on anything.

He pinches the bridge of his nose, exhaling sharply. He can see where Lance is, he can understand what drove this, but- ]

Look, I strongly advise you get off the network until you get...whatever it is you get at the Gates out of your system before you make this any worse. [Because he's just digging an ever-bigger hole for himself here.] And...I don't know, get the heck somewhere where there aren't any people because I don't even want to think about what's going to happen when Maul catches you.

[Because that's going to end in people caught in the crossfire while they deal with their bullshit. Hell, maybe Lance might be able to outrun Maul at the same time- the Sith might just burn himself out in anger. Stranger things have happened. ]

Leave his mask there, please. I'll come get his body and bring him home- I'll take it with me.

[azurestar]

[By this point he's conversed with some people and already left the Gate with Reaper's mask. And by now he's spoken to Maul. He's heard already from Luz that Reaper lives with her and Varian and others and he doesn't really have it in him to even start asking him about that. That's not what's important right now. His head still feels like it's being held on straight by tenuous strings and he has to focus on containment.

Varian's reaction gets a grimace and a wince that reveals signs of corruption in pointed canines in his mouth.] Varian, I understand the situation and I'm not running from Maul. He'll tear the town apart to find me, so I'm meeting him back at the Gate where he can't hurt anyone.

[The words have conviction behind them, but it's evident by his voice, he's still not completely recovered. But he doesn't sound bloodthirsty, just shaken and pained. And a little hollow.]

So you should probably get over there to grab him fast. The mask's with me, I'll give it back to him myself.

un: agentmothman

[zib]

Dude.

I don't know who you or the other guy is, but that is an amazing revenge-taking speech there.

[Zib no do not find this something to be impressed by...]

[azurestar]

[He sighs. At this point, he's conversed enough with others to know one thing.]

Revenge isn't exactly what was in my mind, kid. It's not a good thing.

video; un:mako

[arclightning]

[ Later—later, after Mako has read everything, after everyone has had their say and maybe the dust has settled a little, Mako finally clicks on his video. He never knows what to say about stuff like this, never knows what to do, but obviously Lance needed... something.

And it isn't like Mako hasn't done the exact same thing.

He has. He did, at home, and he can't even really bring himself to regret that Ming-Hua couldn't hurt Korra after what he did, even if he hadn't exactly meant to.

And death isn't a permanent thing here. ]

Lance.

Is anyone going to come after you for this? Are you safe?

[azurestar]

[It's later enough when Lance gets this response that he can answer that question accurately, though he's probably still not all that right up in the head. He's moving in the streets of Prufrock now at top speed without wasting too much energy.

He's trying to keep his frayed and unsteady mind focused on the one very important thing here. Keeping others safe is paramount. Even if everything in his head is falling apart, that part's clear as a bell.

When he answers, his tone is probably a little too casual and disconnected considering what he's saying.]

Maul's threatened to destroy the town to get to me so I'm meeting him at the Gate. So… no, I'm pretty much the opposite of safe. But… that's okay.

Private: un:Dawnknight video

[searingwing]

[Years ago, he had brutally carved a way through the ranks of those who did evil and committed wrongs. He'd done it in a blind rage. It was only when those forces surged up to crush him did he realize his error in letting that fury fill him.

That doesn't feel like the case here. Something happened and once he's read through everything the first hint that Lance is being contacted privately is the hammering sounds of the smiths. Voices in the background and the crackle of flames.

Diluc is dressed like the smiths himself, his hair pinned back out of his way. But his eyes are not judging, just searching. Behind him Willful Machine is doing what they do best, creating.]

Lance, [Calm and measured, same as always.] Talk to me. Whatever you feel like saying.

Private

[azurestar]

[By this point he's pretty tired, frayed at the edges and his head still isn't on all the way right. But he knows after that journey in the river of regrets that Diluc in his own way can grasp this. At least a little. But when he asks that question, he finds his mind disorganized and overwhelmed, his voice lost.]

I... don't know what to say.

[And he doesn't. It's a combination of years of emotional compartmentalization, shame and confusion and just way too much at once. It's all clogging in his heart and throat like a dam of sticks and mud.]

Video | Clickclickbloom

[onekindsoul]

Uh...

Woah.

Look- I get it- Reaper can be kind of the worst but maybe making a public declaration that you killed him isn’t the best idea?

Come on Lance. You're better than this.

This is more of a Maul style move.

[azurestar]

... I know.

I didn't plan any of this.

Text | UN : Medicinal

[meds4sale]

My goodness, what a display.

Do be careful not to make a habit of collecting souvenirs from those you kill, however. As viscerally satisfying as vengeance may be, it is a slippery slope to awakening far darker things.

Mind how you step.

[azurestar]

thanks... i'll keep that in mind.

[By this point, he's not the most open to deep conversations with cryptic sounding guys he's never met over text. It's been a hard day. But he'll indulge guarded discussion if Medicine Seller pushes.]

text; username: grollschwert

[hauntedsavior]

Gratz on killing your demons.
It feels good, right?
It feels pretty good to get rid of them permanently.
So you'll never have to deal with them again.

Except he was a Sleeper.
So what's your plan when he comes back, killer?
Do it again? Forever?

You'll get lost in it.
Hope you have people who can pull you out.

[azurestar]

i don't have a plan
none of this was planned
and i know he's coming back


i don't know if it was about ending his life

[Mentally, his head still isn't completely settled, the grips of the mental break still shaking him to his core. He doesn't have it in him to explain further than that right now to someone he barely knows over text.]

Text, un: Kassandra

[metoikos]

I do not understand any of what is going on.
But congratulations on slaying your demon?

Only, will he not come back?
Does he not have friends?

And, perhaps more concerning, do you intend to keep a dead man's mask in your home?
That will certainly cause all manner of evils to befall you.

[azurestar]

[He has been through this type of conversation so many times by now and he's still so mentally frayed and not entirely with it that he doesn't have it in him to go in depth with a person he just met over text.]

it's complicated

yes and yes
i didn't exactly plan any of this it just sort of happened

dunno why that's more concerning than the other stuff but no
im giving the stupid thing back to him when he revives

Voice un: Hino

[incandescentfaith]

[Well. Shit. This is going to be one of those conversations, now isn't it?]

Lance.

What happened?

Public Video -> Private Voice

[azurestar]

Rei...

[It's been a while since he's heard her voice, and for some reason it's enough to jog something loose in his chest and his face crumples over video looking utterly broken and lost. Rei is one of the very few people here that knows him from that far back, she's special to him even if there's been stretches of time he hasn't seen her. He switches to voice and sets it to private.]

I keep getting asked that... so by now you'd think I'd have an answer that felt good enough. But... all I can really say is bloodsport brought me here. And then he mocked how much I screamed when he- ...you know. And the rest is flashes of fighting. And then he was dead. And then I... snapped in another way.

video; un: sporksfan

[leg_with_heart]

[It's Hunk's own omen that decides to pick up on Lance's broadcast, their bond clear to it that this might be something Hunk would want to hear.

He watches in an odd blend of bewilderment, sorrow, empathy and awe. There was a time he'd never have thought Lance was capable of killing, but after Deerington, the bloodlust and corruption of Deer Country, hell, even with team Voltron, he can't help but feel like it's been conditioned at least somewhat.]

Lance; buddy, you've been on one helluva journey.

[It's really all he can think to muster without physically being there with Lance, to offer a hug or a meal.]

[azurestar]

[It's taken him some time to gather his wits enough and come down from the meltdown enough to respond to all of the reactions. It's been draining to say the least, but strangely the hardest ones have been Hunk and Shiro.

Right now, he doesn't have the words for why that is. His chest feels like it's in a vice, seeing his best friend look at him that way. It's just normal concern and empathy, the same thing he'd feel if their positions were reversed. But… it's immeasurably hard seeing family hurt, and he knows he's breaking his best bro's heart and it's all just a mess.]

Yeah… yeah, I guess I have. [He looks down, rubs at his eyes with one hand.] I'm sorry, man.