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Entry tags:
🍒🍭ƎᗡOM ЯƎTꙄ⋊ƆIЯT🍭🍒 | un: carcinoGeneticist
cw: brainwashing/mental alterations/drug themes without the drugs/nsfw themes
EMERGENCY MEMO: READ THIS OR GET FUCKED
ATTENTION INFERIOR SUBCREATURES: YOU MAY BE IN IMMEDIATE DANGER. DO NOT DO ANYTHING STUPID. LET'S COLLECTIVELY HOLD OUR CHILL. I'M TRYING TO GET THIS UP AS QUICKLY AS I CAN BEFORE IT IS TOO LATE. I MUST BEGRUDGINGLY ADMIT THAT I HAVE MADE AN UNFORTUNATE ERROR AND Į̵̰̱̼̤̰̤̝͔̦̌͝ ̷̠̰͇͓̙̰̲̈͝M̵̱̪̈́̊̐̒A̷̡̹̩̦̱̞͓̭̐̃́͊̚Y̴̨̲̭͍̱͈̣͙͍͂́̆̆̄̆͝͠ ̶̢͈̳̲̅̇̄̄͂͜H̸̡̻̤̎̋͒͋̉͘A̸̡͇͚̮͉͙͓̳̍ͅͅV̸͎̪̆̀̃̇̏͝E̷͉̣͎͌̀̈́̚͝ ̷̲̮͍̮̮̝̌̊̋͋̎̋̇̀̄̏͜͜ͅC̴̨͓͖͍̓̉͊ͅŔ̸̛̯̻̯́̎̓͗͗̎̐͐Ē̸̢̤̄̐A̵̙̳̾̈́́̅̽̄̎̐͝T̶̡̧̧͓͚̲͉͓̔́̂̍E̷̤̻̜̫͎͍̱͔̪̊͝D̶͖̺̋̀̽͌̉͑̄̋ ̸̞͈̖̝̄̊̈̀̄̅Ȃ̴̝̱̪͙́̀̌ ̵̛̣̱̪͌̈́͐͛́͊̔̅̕V̷̤̥̯̤̏͒͗̈̿̈́̒̓Ḯ̶͔͇̭̱̥͇̞̃̀̆͝R̶͇͙͔͎̫͙̆̊̒Ú̶̡̘̣͓̩͍̙͖̓͒̇͂̓͒́̕̕S̴̪̱̠͔̭͉̖̻̉͒̆̈́̍̈́̿͘
M̷̨̥̫̻̖͖̟͂͑̏̌͌̾ͅA̸͍̠̖̝̱̥̿̈́̀̂̏͠͝K̶͍̞͍̱͇̅̇͋̏͆̚Ę̴̧͖͙̤̲̱͙̓̅́͂̔͋ͅ ̶͙̬̱̬̞͆͆̅͝Š̷̖͈̝̎̈̿̈́͐̂̒̔̓͜Ủ̵̢̹̹̲̣͊̆Ṛ̴̢̲̝͙̬̱͚͊̀̓E̶̺̤̹͚͂̒̏̈́̓̿̃͝ ̴̖̪͈̝̥̝̩̭̹͌̉͆̀̀̈́͊͘͝ͅŃ̵̻͚̥͐̈́̓̚O̴̢̢̖̜̯̹͈̳͆̈́Ṫ̴̪͕͓͙͔̳̭̆̔̈́͛̆͜͝ ̴̡̔͌̑̊̑͌̅̍Ţ̸͙̭͓͎̼̹̩͑̒̈́͂͑̈́̉̂̚͜Ò̴̢̭͔̞͇̰̙̟̼̈́̆ ̵̡̢̼̱̖͕͔̙̖̻͛̐͂̾̈́́͗̓̕͘O̶̢̤̹̭̓́͑̎̇̽̅̈́̄͝P̴̭̌̃͝Ę̵͍̟̜͍̓̏̕Ň̷̟̣̤̉͋̇̿̽̚͝͝ ̵̼̘̄͂́̈́̂̆̓̚͜͝A̸̘̭̞̫̤̠͓̼͌̃̈N̸̮̰̟͎͚̤̏̾͛͛̿̀̾͠ͅY̵̡̖̺̗̮̦̻͚͗́̀̉ ̴̄͋̌̂̄̾̚͜͝R̴̨̖͍͔̩͇͇̜̙͓̈̅͝͝Ą̷͂́͛͋̆̽̽̃͆̀N̵̯͌̍͑͌̔͊͝Ḑ̵̩̦͉̣̓̏O̷̢̮̞̖̩͚̎̏̊͛͂̚̚M̸̫̙̣̱̱͔̝͍̥̖̂́̿̓͐͐̋̚̚͝ ̷̨̧͍̦̖͔̪̘͆Ḽ̴̨̤̹̃̎̂́͗̄̾́ͅI̵̪͓̦͙͙͕͖͓͓̖̿̂͑̒̄̍̓N̵̯͚̱̠͑K̸̢̛͔̠̺̩̰̮͇̀͊͆͐̒͋S̷̨̧̡̙̜͓̗͍̈́̓̄̑̍̆̚͝ͅ ̴̖̬̖̲̬̣͈̗̹̩̓̓̊̄Į̷̤͇̭̙̘̾̓̾̆͗͝ ̵̢͍͉͓̮͚̫͚͒͛̐̅͋͛͘S̴̻͙̅̆̈̂͒̔̔̕͘͝Ȩ̶̡͆͛̔͂̓̚N̶̨̨̟̳̯̰̤̗͖͇̑͋͑̍͠D̸̘̜̟̖̽ ̵̖̼̐͌͊͌Y̸͖̥̻̖͓̘̟̻͒̐̕̚Ó̴̝̿̃̉͆̀̃͆̔Ư̵̢̲̥̩̩̔́̋͑ ̴̢̛̟̜̩̘̥̆̑̾͗̓͛̈́͆͘Į̵͈̺̦̳͖̩͍̗̮͑̅N̴̜͚̜͔̲͈̣̏̏̅̄̀͘ ᗡIꟼUTꙄ OꙄ MA I ⋊ƆUꟻ ⋊ƆUꟻ ᎮͶI⋊ƆUꟻ
G̸͎̮̈́̊Ơ̴̢̯͕̤̩̦̰̟̲̆̅̅͊͗̚͝ͅD̷̠̫̺̓̓̓̔̍̆̂ ̵̠̣̖̹̼̂̒͘F̴̡̟̠̣͈͕̅͝Ụ̷̖̓̈̈́̏̍͐̅̕C̴̨̡͓̰̥͕̼̯̰̃̈́̅̒̅Ķ̴̼̂̐I̷̡̢̚Ń̸͉̟͖̜̘͚̹̓̈́͑ͅG̸̨̤̘͚̥̹̘͓̒͛̆͂̈́ ̸̢̨͎̰̳̎̐̈́͝D̷͖̬̤̭̦̀̆̅̂͊̽̽͆͂͌Å̶̙͎̹͊͛M̵̝̳̤͙̠̞̳̓̒̏Ñ̸̖̮͓̦̖͖̣̈͜͜ ̴̛̻̼̉͂͛Į̴̛͓͙̂̂̈́̓͝T̴̢̗̘̘̱̭͌͐̈́ ̸͍̚
̵͓̝͍͎͚͔͖̿̿̑͌̏͝Î̶̘͓̞̮̺̦̦̩͋̆͊͜F̷͔̹̽̏̇͊̐̉͊̕ ̸̳̟̪̮̣̀̌̃͜͝Y̶̗͚͔̦̤̤͍̩͂O̶͖͌̐͐̓̆̆͝Ȕ̸̧͍̹̫̭̤̬͆̔́̂́ ̷͚͚̖̯̠͔̲̝͈͊͜͝C̷̝͇̼̿̇̌̉̃A̶̮͔͍͙̜͉̣̗͇͒͒̾͂̒̀̎͒Ṇ̵̝͔̩̺̱̣̗̼̒̎ ̴͇̝̪̂̂̇̒́̌̌U̶̘͌̾̊̿̽͘N̷̡͚̦͈̠͗̈́̎͋͋͜͝C̵̢͖͕͕̗͠R̶̨͉̦͍̗͙̐̃̌̇̐͛̑̀͜Y̷͎̿̀͛P̶͙̙̦̯͉̩̫̙̉T̶̫̪̗̽͗̐̓̈́͗͝ ̷̢̼̦̯͛Ṫ̴̡̡͎͍̖̻͍͉̺̝͆̓̄͊̌̍̈́̾̿Ḥ̸͇͓̗̩͈̭͖́̈́̈́̓͗̎͛͝ͅǏ̸̳S̷͓͖̲̠̗̝͕̐̃̆̾̎̏ ̷̬̘̦̬̫̭̏͌̈̈́͆̇̀͊̂̚Y̶͍̤̓̾͋̾́̑̕O̶̠͖̭͍̥͊̓̂̃̇Ư̶̳̪̦̾͒̔̑͂͠ ̸̭̼̥̖̺̜̫̥̱͚̈́̿̍̒̏̅A̷̧̻̙͔̘͕̠͖̋̇R̵̛͙̘̗̣͇͐͑͊͌͒̄̈́͋͝E̷̛͚̬̙̫͎͔͕͗̅̀͗̋̑̕͜͠
̷̲͎͈̘͚͈͕̣̅̋̈́Ḭ̵̢̼̣̐͘͜͝O̵̧̤͚͚̞͉̠̯͇̩͝n̷̡̧̟̺͈͖̰̹̤͆̌͌̄͝͝͝ͅm̴̰̝͉̼̩̥̗̰̑̇͒͝f̶̮̘̻͖̙̜̻͓̙͑̃̓͂͊̀̈̚D̵͍̓͋̓̊͒͌̓͂g̷̡̰̰̪͂f̴͉̞̻̊̿̈́̿̍͊́̒͝͠k̷̝͙̇̋̾̄͂̕s̸̛͉̥̋͛͗͝͝ͅͅj̴̨̡͇̭̹̬̰̯̤̣̾̀̐̽̐ḍ̸̢̜̖̣͓̲͍̄̈̓̓̍̇̂̊́͝g̶̼̯̯͌̄́̍̔̑̉̅͝
̶̛̠̦͚̜̺͇͓͍̟͒̑͑̊́̈́̔̕͜g̷̛͈͇̱̩̩͉̿̋̒̎f̶̡̛̝̺͙̭̳̹̓͋̏̈̿̉k̶̭̺̜͍͕̈́͗̓̉̉͒͘̚̕f̶̜̖̭̞̉̐̾͠g̴̨͚͚͍̣̥̈́̏͝ͅ
]|I{•------» ғ𝕦к «------•}I|[
]|I{•------» Processing «------•}I|[
WOW!!!!! THAT WAS CLOSE!!!! HAHAHAHA. YOU WERE ALL ABOUT TO BE MADE INTO GRUBSAUCE. PRACTICALLY A ROOKIE MISTAKE THERE.
BUT FEAR NOT, YOUR COMPASSIONATE AND INCREDIBLY INTELLIGENT LEADER THOUGHT ON HIS FEET AND SAVED YOU ALL FROM A CATACLYSMIC MISERY. YOU CAN THANK ME NOW. YOU ARE SO WELCOME. THE ONLY THING I ASK IN EXCHANGE FOR KEEPING YOU ALL SAFE IS YOUR ABSOLUTE LOVE AND DEVOTION TO ME FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE ❤️
OR ELSE. HAHA!
TO COLLECTIVELY RECOVER FROM THAT SCARE, LET US RELAX WITH THE MUSIC OF A DIFFERENT, BETTER, SIMPLER TIME.
WATCH WITH ME.
NOW, IS IT ME, OR IS THIS THE BEST TIME OF YEAR FOR SLOPPY MAKE-OUT SESSIONS? WE SHOULD ALL KISS AND CHILL OUT. EVERYONE'S SO STRESSED LATELY. WE JUST NEED TO...RELAX.
(Enjoy the horrendous, squeaky music and bright flashing lights that will consume your Omni...and your brain! Welcome to Trickster Mode. If you don't fall for the first link, maybe you'll fall for the second! Either will lead to some serious brainwashing!
If you're smart, you probably won't actually open that link. To avoid Trickster Mode - that's all you gotta do! Not fall for this rookie way to get people to put viruses on their tech (and psyche).)
ATTENTION INFERIOR SUBCREATURES: YOU MAY BE IN IMMEDIATE DANGER. DO NOT DO ANYTHING STUPID. LET'S COLLECTIVELY HOLD OUR CHILL. I'M TRYING TO GET THIS UP AS QUICKLY AS I CAN BEFORE IT IS TOO LATE. I MUST BEGRUDGINGLY ADMIT THAT I HAVE MADE AN UNFORTUNATE ERROR AND Į̵̰̱̼̤̰̤̝͔̦̌͝ ̷̠̰͇͓̙̰̲̈͝M̵̱̪̈́̊̐̒A̷̡̹̩̦̱̞͓̭̐̃́͊̚Y̴̨̲̭͍̱͈̣͙͍͂́̆̆̄̆͝͠ ̶̢͈̳̲̅̇̄̄͂͜H̸̡̻̤̎̋͒͋̉͘A̸̡͇͚̮͉͙͓̳̍ͅͅV̸͎̪̆̀̃̇̏͝E̷͉̣͎͌̀̈́̚͝ ̷̲̮͍̮̮̝̌̊̋͋̎̋̇̀̄̏͜͜ͅC̴̨͓͖͍̓̉͊ͅŔ̸̛̯̻̯́̎̓͗͗̎̐͐Ē̸̢̤̄̐A̵̙̳̾̈́́̅̽̄̎̐͝T̶̡̧̧͓͚̲͉͓̔́̂̍E̷̤̻̜̫͎͍̱͔̪̊͝D̶͖̺̋̀̽͌̉͑̄̋ ̸̞͈̖̝̄̊̈̀̄̅Ȃ̴̝̱̪͙́̀̌ ̵̛̣̱̪͌̈́͐͛́͊̔̅̕V̷̤̥̯̤̏͒͗̈̿̈́̒̓Ḯ̶͔͇̭̱̥͇̞̃̀̆͝R̶͇͙͔͎̫͙̆̊̒Ú̶̡̘̣͓̩͍̙͖̓͒̇͂̓͒́̕̕S̴̪̱̠͔̭͉̖̻̉͒̆̈́̍̈́̿͘
M̷̨̥̫̻̖͖̟͂͑̏̌͌̾ͅA̸͍̠̖̝̱̥̿̈́̀̂̏͠͝K̶͍̞͍̱͇̅̇͋̏͆̚Ę̴̧͖͙̤̲̱͙̓̅́͂̔͋ͅ ̶͙̬̱̬̞͆͆̅͝Š̷̖͈̝̎̈̿̈́͐̂̒̔̓͜Ủ̵̢̹̹̲̣͊̆Ṛ̴̢̲̝͙̬̱͚͊̀̓E̶̺̤̹͚͂̒̏̈́̓̿̃͝ ̴̖̪͈̝̥̝̩̭̹͌̉͆̀̀̈́͊͘͝ͅŃ̵̻͚̥͐̈́̓̚O̴̢̢̖̜̯̹͈̳͆̈́Ṫ̴̪͕͓͙͔̳̭̆̔̈́͛̆͜͝ ̴̡̔͌̑̊̑͌̅̍Ţ̸͙̭͓͎̼̹̩͑̒̈́͂͑̈́̉̂̚͜Ò̴̢̭͔̞͇̰̙̟̼̈́̆ ̵̡̢̼̱̖͕͔̙̖̻͛̐͂̾̈́́͗̓̕͘O̶̢̤̹̭̓́͑̎̇̽̅̈́̄͝P̴̭̌̃͝Ę̵͍̟̜͍̓̏̕Ň̷̟̣̤̉͋̇̿̽̚͝͝ ̵̼̘̄͂́̈́̂̆̓̚͜͝A̸̘̭̞̫̤̠͓̼͌̃̈N̸̮̰̟͎͚̤̏̾͛͛̿̀̾͠ͅY̵̡̖̺̗̮̦̻͚͗́̀̉ ̴̄͋̌̂̄̾̚͜͝R̴̨̖͍͔̩͇͇̜̙͓̈̅͝͝Ą̷͂́͛͋̆̽̽̃͆̀N̵̯͌̍͑͌̔͊͝Ḑ̵̩̦͉̣̓̏O̷̢̮̞̖̩͚̎̏̊͛͂̚̚M̸̫̙̣̱̱͔̝͍̥̖̂́̿̓͐͐̋̚̚͝ ̷̨̧͍̦̖͔̪̘͆Ḽ̴̨̤̹̃̎̂́͗̄̾́ͅI̵̪͓̦͙͙͕͖͓͓̖̿̂͑̒̄̍̓N̵̯͚̱̠͑K̸̢̛͔̠̺̩̰̮͇̀͊͆͐̒͋S̷̨̧̡̙̜͓̗͍̈́̓̄̑̍̆̚͝ͅ ̴̖̬̖̲̬̣͈̗̹̩̓̓̊̄Į̷̤͇̭̙̘̾̓̾̆͗͝ ̵̢͍͉͓̮͚̫͚͒͛̐̅͋͛͘S̴̻͙̅̆̈̂͒̔̔̕͘͝Ȩ̶̡͆͛̔͂̓̚N̶̨̨̟̳̯̰̤̗͖͇̑͋͑̍͠D̸̘̜̟̖̽ ̵̖̼̐͌͊͌Y̸͖̥̻̖͓̘̟̻͒̐̕̚Ó̴̝̿̃̉͆̀̃͆̔Ư̵̢̲̥̩̩̔́̋͑ ̴̢̛̟̜̩̘̥̆̑̾͗̓͛̈́͆͘Į̵͈̺̦̳͖̩͍̗̮͑̅N̴̜͚̜͔̲͈̣̏̏̅̄̀͘ ᗡIꟼUTꙄ OꙄ MA I ⋊ƆUꟻ ⋊ƆUꟻ ᎮͶI⋊ƆUꟻ
G̸͎̮̈́̊Ơ̴̢̯͕̤̩̦̰̟̲̆̅̅͊͗̚͝ͅD̷̠̫̺̓̓̓̔̍̆̂ ̵̠̣̖̹̼̂̒͘F̴̡̟̠̣͈͕̅͝Ụ̷̖̓̈̈́̏̍͐̅̕C̴̨̡͓̰̥͕̼̯̰̃̈́̅̒̅Ķ̴̼̂̐I̷̡̢̚Ń̸͉̟͖̜̘͚̹̓̈́͑ͅG̸̨̤̘͚̥̹̘͓̒͛̆͂̈́ ̸̢̨͎̰̳̎̐̈́͝D̷͖̬̤̭̦̀̆̅̂͊̽̽͆͂͌Å̶̙͎̹͊͛M̵̝̳̤͙̠̞̳̓̒̏Ñ̸̖̮͓̦̖͖̣̈͜͜ ̴̛̻̼̉͂͛Į̴̛͓͙̂̂̈́̓͝T̴̢̗̘̘̱̭͌͐̈́ ̸͍̚
̵͓̝͍͎͚͔͖̿̿̑͌̏͝Î̶̘͓̞̮̺̦̦̩͋̆͊͜F̷͔̹̽̏̇͊̐̉͊̕ ̸̳̟̪̮̣̀̌̃͜͝Y̶̗͚͔̦̤̤͍̩͂O̶͖͌̐͐̓̆̆͝Ȕ̸̧͍̹̫̭̤̬͆̔́̂́ ̷͚͚̖̯̠͔̲̝͈͊͜͝C̷̝͇̼̿̇̌̉̃A̶̮͔͍͙̜͉̣̗͇͒͒̾͂̒̀̎͒Ṇ̵̝͔̩̺̱̣̗̼̒̎ ̴͇̝̪̂̂̇̒́̌̌U̶̘͌̾̊̿̽͘N̷̡͚̦͈̠͗̈́̎͋͋͜͝C̵̢͖͕͕̗͠R̶̨͉̦͍̗͙̐̃̌̇̐͛̑̀͜Y̷͎̿̀͛P̶͙̙̦̯͉̩̫̙̉T̶̫̪̗̽͗̐̓̈́͗͝ ̷̢̼̦̯͛Ṫ̴̡̡͎͍̖̻͍͉̺̝͆̓̄͊̌̍̈́̾̿Ḥ̸͇͓̗̩͈̭͖́̈́̈́̓͗̎͛͝ͅǏ̸̳S̷͓͖̲̠̗̝͕̐̃̆̾̎̏ ̷̬̘̦̬̫̭̏͌̈̈́͆̇̀͊̂̚Y̶͍̤̓̾͋̾́̑̕O̶̠͖̭͍̥͊̓̂̃̇Ư̶̳̪̦̾͒̔̑͂͠ ̸̭̼̥̖̺̜̫̥̱͚̈́̿̍̒̏̅A̷̧̻̙͔̘͕̠͖̋̇R̵̛͙̘̗̣͇͐͑͊͌͒̄̈́͋͝E̷̛͚̬̙̫͎͔͕͗̅̀͗̋̑̕͜͠
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]|I{•------» ғ𝕦к «------•}I|[
]|I{•------» Processing «------•}I|[
WOW!!!!! THAT WAS CLOSE!!!! HAHAHAHA. YOU WERE ALL ABOUT TO BE MADE INTO GRUBSAUCE. PRACTICALLY A ROOKIE MISTAKE THERE.
BUT FEAR NOT, YOUR COMPASSIONATE AND INCREDIBLY INTELLIGENT LEADER THOUGHT ON HIS FEET AND SAVED YOU ALL FROM A CATACLYSMIC MISERY. YOU CAN THANK ME NOW. YOU ARE SO WELCOME. THE ONLY THING I ASK IN EXCHANGE FOR KEEPING YOU ALL SAFE IS YOUR ABSOLUTE LOVE AND DEVOTION TO ME FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE ❤️
OR ELSE. HAHA!
TO COLLECTIVELY RECOVER FROM THAT SCARE, LET US RELAX WITH THE MUSIC OF A DIFFERENT, BETTER, SIMPLER TIME.
WATCH WITH ME.
NOW, IS IT ME, OR IS THIS THE BEST TIME OF YEAR FOR SLOPPY MAKE-OUT SESSIONS? WE SHOULD ALL KISS AND CHILL OUT. EVERYONE'S SO STRESSED LATELY. WE JUST NEED TO...RELAX.
(Enjoy the horrendous, squeaky music and bright flashing lights that will consume your Omni...and your brain! Welcome to Trickster Mode. If you don't fall for the first link, maybe you'll fall for the second! Either will lead to some serious brainwashing!
If you're smart, you probably won't actually open that link. To avoid Trickster Mode - that's all you gotta do! Not fall for this rookie way to get people to put viruses on their tech (and psyche).)
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Karkat?
[Then he really HEARS him and his eyes go wide and his face suffuses with pink colour.]
I. What? Uhm.
You're orange.
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(He would have never seen himself as orange before, but now that he was, it felt like a good color to him. The whole world felt warm and sparkling, especially around Kyle, like there was a halo radiating from him. He holds his own face.)
You're so beautiful. Oh my glob. (He tiptoes forward, his feet dirty from having run all around Trench like a maniac. He throws his arms around Kyle, but uses the straightjacket to his advantage, letting it wrap around, locking them together.)
Let's get married. And have babies. And live happily together forever after. We can replicate every love story ever told. It will be so amazing.
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The OTHER part of Kyle is busy being emotionally pummeled in the balls because of COURSE Karkat high as a fucking kite would want to recreate a romance movie.]
Uhm. Okay, well. Okay, that... requires planning. So. How about weeeee sit down... and you can tell me all about this Omni experiment you did while Iiiiiii look up Trench wedding rituals!
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(He's practically vibrating out of his skin. And Kyle is so warm too. And soft. Holy shit. Karkat nuzzles against his shoulder.)
We can do the nude drawing scene from Titanic although I can't really draw.
(Sitting down...He shimmies against Kyle, staring up at him.)
We can't sit now. What- what do you mean Trickster Mode? It's the best thing ever! It's replicating a totally cool glitch in the game that can make you like, suuuuper powerful! (And more importantly super hyper and in love.)
We can make our own ritual.
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[That gets a surprised laugh out of him.] I can't draw either.
Trickster Mode? That's what you call it? Okay, no, that's cool! See, I just like knowing about your cool stuff. How'd you do it? Could you show me? [Yes, sneaky!]
Mm, then we definitely need to plan. So it's perfect.
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He pulls himself up Kyle like he's a tree and wraps his bare legs around Kyle's waist. He readjusts his arms to settle around Kyle's neck and he goes in for the kill, pressing a searing kiss against Kyle's mouth.
Also a deeply contagious kiss. Enjoy the conversion to Trickster Mode, Kyle.)
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Kyle kisses back... and has a moment of pure panic when he feels something CHANGE.]
...you kiss good.
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He smiles broadly against Kyle's mouth. Bingo.)
I can kiss even better with a lot of tongue if you want.
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Yeah! That's a really good idea! [He just wraps his arms around Karkat a little tighter and proceeds to do just that.]
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I know! (He smothers Kyle for a moment, practically plunging his tongue as far down Kyle's throat as it could go. Who needs to breathe? It's for chumps.
He does break the kiss after a second, looking fiendish.)
You look even prettier now. So bright! And God, you smell good. (He felt starved just looking at Kyle.
This classroom was about to be destroyed.)
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You're the most beautiful person ever! I love you SO much, Karkat! My little mothman! [He nuzzles Karkat aggressively.]
What do you want most in life? I'll give it to you! Anything at all! Jewelry? Candy? A giant stuffed crab?!
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You are the best thing ever.
(What does he want? Neither jewelry or candy appeal to him, but then the giant stuffed crab...)
Okay, yes, absolutely that, that would be so cute! But I mostly just want to get married and maybe make love like fifty million times in a row. They have rings here!
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I am going to make you a giant crab stuffie. And then make love to you fifty zillion times! And yes, of COURSE I'll make an honest troll of you!
What kind of ring do you want?
they boutta have a vegas wedding
We need to go dancing. We need to- (DO EVERYTHING. Right now.)
It's going to be so wet.
(Drenched.)
I've never even thought about jewelry before! Pick it out for me. I'll love anything you give to me. Because I love you.
cw: ectoplasm grossness
[He smushes Karkat to him, then takes a deep breath and steps back. His eyes unfocus and his body sags forward slightly.] Cancer is the fourth sign of the zodiac. Karkinos.
[Kyle's body heaves once and dark blood glimmers in his eyes before it spills forth. Rather than glitter everywhere it instead holds together, milkier than usual, and more pours from Kyle's nostrils.]
Sarṭan. [His voice is thick and clogged as more of the shimmering substance protrudes from his mouth. The lot of it clumps together and twists to the floor like a thick ribbon where it gathers and forms itself into a crab. A bright orange and pink plushie crab. A bright orange and pink plushie crab about four feet tall. It waddles sideways, soft pincers opening and closing.
Kyle blinks and stands up, wiping at his mouth with the back of his hand. Then he beams.]
See! For you! I'll do anything for you!
Re: cw: ectoplasm grossness
(Guess who constantly forgot about human zodiacs! But Kyle's right. Karkat watches silently, not moving a muscle least he disturb the process. He gasps sharply, eyes swelling up and he bends over.)
Oh my god! (He screams this, placing his hands on the shell of the crab. He marvels over the crab, and some part of him that's still Karkat actually feels touched by this gesture. Which means Trickster!Karkat loses his fucking mind.)
This is our child. He's perfect. I will eviscerate anyone who insults him or hurts him. I've never seen anything so amazing before.
(He throws himself at Kyle a moment later, giving another scream. They were definitely probably disturbing some nearby class going on. Sorry, scholars.)
You are the best. I don't deserve you, but I don't even care!
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He also has no idea of the hangover that awaits him when he eventually comes down from this little adventure.
The stuffed crab rubs against Karkat like a wiggly puppy until he pulls away. When Karkat launches himself at him, Kyle wraps his arms around him as tight as he can manage. He tears up completely, although he still can't stop smiling.]
You deserve BETTER! I can never be good enough for you. Not ever. I know that. I know that, and it's okay because you're here with me and our child and we're happy!
[He lifts Karkat up and kisses him. It gets obscene pretty quickly.] You need a ring. And a monster strap on.
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There's something gleaming and hostile in Karkat's eyes for a moment, something manic, violent, but his smile doesn't drop for a second.)
Do not speak like that about yourself! (It made him feel slightly murderous, but not towards Kyle exactly. The violence passes and he's back to kissing Kyle because kissing Kyle was way better than murder anyway.)
You need a ring too! (Then he pulls back, gasping loudly, before throwing his head back and cackling.)
Do I? (He drops his head back down, eyes glittering with mirth.) I suppose I should trust my husband-to-be with what I do or don't need. But where could we find one?
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I do. That's traditional, anyway.
[He grins, a little sharklike himself.] Sure! For the honeymoon. [He nuzzles into Karkat's neck.] Loveyouloveyouloveyou want to make you happy. And I dunno!
[He pulls back, curls sproinging everywhere.] Willful Machine! Or maybe Cellar Door! We can go dancing in Cellar Door, too! Karkat, pleeeeeeeeeeeeease, let's go there! We'll find rings and fake dongs and dance all night and then make love all when the sun rises!
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(He's never gone dancing before and suddenly it's all he wants to do. He drops down from Kyle and shakes his arm excitedly. He noticed that little ass grab, and he was torn between wanting to do something about it now and building the anticipation.)
I'm so ready. Come on, Kyle! (He gives another yank, but then stops to pick up the crab. Which goes horribly because it's only like a foot smaller than him. He falls over on top of it and stands back up, putting his hands on his hips.)
Okay, you're carrying this and we're making a pitstop at my place first to tuck our son in for a nap. Then we're clubbing. And fucking.
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[Kyle scoops up the crab and follows Karkat out of the classroom, practically vibrating with good cheer.] Dance and fuck, dance and fuck, dance and fuck!
[Sober Kyle can't dance for shit, and he knows it, which means he has avoided clubs his entire legally adult life. But it sounds SO COOL right now. So he tags along beside Karkat as they rush to the School of Mutter's lamp in order to get back to Karkat's cave. There, he hurries along to the living area and Karkat's little nest.]
Crabson, you will sleep while your daddies go get their freak on.
[By this point his body is feeling just the sliiightest bit tired, mostly because of the creation of the crab, but he still mostly feels like he's downed a Redbull and snorted a line of coke. Karkat, who has had the virus longer, may be faring differently but Kyle has no idea.
Crab tucked in, Kyle springs back to his full height.]
Okay!
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He smiles at Kyle saying goodnight to their child, and he damn near sheds a tear over the scene. He actually winds up taking a picture of the two because look at his boys...! He was going to put that in a frame on his desk at the job he did not have. He has to restrain himself from pushing Kyle over into the bed and instead takes a deep breath. Right. The club.
Destination.)
Let's gooo.
(And off they went. Karkat has only passed Earworm once or twice, but it's easy enough to find after teleporting to the lamp. His legs are freezing, but he doesn't notice at all. He's still buzzing with the impact of the virus. But when they get into the club, he does lean towards Kyle and shouts:)
You're going to have to warm me up! (And grabs a hand to press it against his bare thigh.) Freezing!
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Writhing against someone doesn't require much coordination; you just move to the pulse of the music. In his current state, that's easy for Kyle to do. He keeps Karkat close against him, ready to cheerfully maim anyone who so much as looks at him funny.]
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