1 Point | Video; UN: Strike1st | CW Language

[strikefirster]

[The feed opens up to a crooked shot of a building that screams abandoned warehouse vibes. Out of frame is a man in a black karate gi standing next to a grandfather clock with the words "Professor Dongspin" written on it in green paint.]

Now I just got here but I've been seen a lot of talk about free fighting lessons. But we all know that in life you get what you pay for.

You want to really kick the competition? Then you need to get your ass down to Cobra Kai.

Screw that weird ass fairy tale bullshit. Learn from someone who drinks raw eggs, not pansy ass hot chocolate.

You'll learn bone crunching, face smashing, all American Karate. For the reasonable price of your blood, sweat and tears.

We're not going to be doing any self-defense, It's time to learn self-offense.

Don't be a pussy. Join Cobra Kai and let me teach you the way of the fist.

[And then leaps into the air and delivers a spinning kick into the grandfather clock which collapses and smashes against the ground.

The feed cuts out shortly after.]

Comments

[strikefirster]

What are you talking about?

I've only got one bag in my car. That's nothing.

[kyley_b]

I meant-- nevermind.

So like... American Karate? Isn't karate Japanese?

And do you seriously drink raw eggs?

[strikefirster]

Cobra Kai is a different style of karate. My Sensei developed it while it fighting in Vietnam to fight against the bastards there. Take what the enemy knows and use it against them or some bullshit like that.

So it does have like whatever fucking Asian roots you want to call it, but it's an American style. Meant to kick the shit out of other karate.

Not normally but I fucking would for training. Rocky does that shit. [He mostly eats beef jerky and ham slices for breakfast.]

[kyley_b]

Okay, maybe let's not just call them bastards, the Vietnam War was pretty fucked up.

Okay, right. So this isn't like, the karate they taught at the mall when I was a little kid?

Jesus, I am so worried about your cholesterol...

[strikefirster]

His words not mine, he was a real bastard too.

[J-Johnny you still said it.]

I taught out of a strip mall for the most part. But I'd take my students out into the woods, junkyards and construction sites depend on the lesson. It's different. We teach people how to really fight.

Don't be. I've been to the hospital plenty of times for broken bones and shit. They've never said a word about it.

[kyley_b]

I believe it. I'm just saying, like, nuance.

Dude, yes, a strip mall was where ours was! There was a bar right near it, my friend's dad used to get wasted while we practiced. It sucked.

Yeah, but when's the last time you had a physical? I guess it doesn't matter now, you've got magic blood here.

[strikefirster]

Yeah. Fine. I don't need you pulling out a Miguel lecture on me.

No bar but we've got a minimart beside it. I usually pick up some beer from there and get wasted at home afterwards. Depending on the day.

Guess not. can't remember anyways. Still don't get the magic blood thing. Kind of wish mine lit on fire like some other peoples. That would've been badass.

[kyley_b]

Is that your student?

Yeah, but you never drove home a car full of eight year olds I bet. I hope.

What did you get?

CW: Child abandonment

[strikefirster]

Yeah. Current All Valley champion. He's a good kid. Helped me get my head on straight too.

[There is a moment where Johnny looks a little distant. Probably because he walked out on his son and has only just now been trying to actually get back into his life.]

Nah... Can't say I've done that before. Drove a few of my students but they're all teens.

Don't really know what kind- Smells weird and milky though.

[kyley_b]

You must miss him.

...but drunk? [Johnny, this is the issue here.]

Oh! Paleblood! I know a fair number of those, it's pretty dope. You guys are basically psychic.

[strikefirster]

...Don't tell him that. Don't want him thinking I've suddenly become a pussy.

Yeah? [He has driven under the influence a lot. It's amazing that he is still alive.]

Seriously? That doesn't sound badass at all. I'll totally wimp out if I'm moving things around with my mind.

[kyley_b]

It's not weak to give a shit, dude.

That's not good. That's how people wind up dead.

Oh, no, that's telekinetic,the moving thing. That's Darkbloods. You'll be like... reading minds and shit maybe.

[strikefirster]

Yeah. But I have an image to maintain. You can show you care without showing that you care.

[This was not true. He was a bleeding heart when it came to Miguel.]

It hasn't got me killed yet. In fact my car only got smashed up because some teenagers drove into it. I wasn't even in the car at the time!

[That did not defend the whole drunk driving thing.]

That's like just as bad- I don't want to know what people are thinking. That's cheap as shit in a fight.

[kyley_b]

Can you, though?

Yeah, but that's not the norm. I've got statistics. [Because he's a nerd.]

You might manifest something else, but that's the general type of thing. And uhm, emotional stuff.

[strikefirster]

Yeah.

Like when you push your student into the pool with his hands tied behind his back. And you pull him up once to tell him that drowning is for pussies. That's how you show you care.

I don't care about stats. They don't mean shit.

...Weird. I don't need to get all emotional someone.

[kyley_b]

...okaaay, I guess that's one method.

They literally mean shit, dude.

I guess we'll see how it manifests.

[strikefirster]

He wanted to learn how to kick. I helped him.

Sounds pretty fake to me.

[kyley_b]

I can't argue with that.

Dude. You're a fucking riot, you know that?