Video UN: glyphywitchy [Back dated to May 12]

[imaglyphwitch]

[It's been a few days since dying, and Luz had unfortunately kept this to herself. If you haven't been able to tell, this girl has been having a pretty rough month, and it didn't seem to be getting better. She lurched her device to focus, and, though coughing, was looking directly into the camera].

So. Uh. Died. First time, ha ha, not a fun experience. Kinda looking for some company, here or just on this thing otherwise. I should probably be getting rest, yes, but staring up at the ceiling regretting stuff and hating yourself can only keep out the quiet for so long.

Also, been out of the loop a bit. Someone update me on things?


[Action]


Luz was pretty sure that she was going to get an earful from people in the house, but ESPECIALLY from Ahiru, who had very much not wanted her to go on the mission. Luz had thought she could handle it and had handled somewhat similar situations before. Now, though, since they'd talked about it before, Luz knew it looked even WORSE.

Add the whole mix of self-loathing for being too weak to avoid death and the ever-present gloom of missing Fern and Varian, and Luz was pretty much a powder keg of emotions and blah. She was in her room right now, dimly lit with her purple lights and surrounded by a fort of stuffed animals and, well, Luz was a sight to see.

Comments

Re: Video

[schoolingfish]

[He knows she's feeling terrible. He knows she's blaming herself. He knows she's feeling miserable and he knows she just died, so instead of criticizing her or scolding her or saying anything at all, once the door opens, Luca just hugs her.]

Re: Video

[imaglyphwitch]

[Luz just...melts here. She could put on a brave face to almost everyone, but the people in the house? They were her family, and half of them were BONDED to her. Luca had been the second person to do this ritual with her, and even now she could feel his intention right now.

She needed it, and held onto him, crying softly. Luz was not a hard crier, but when things hurt, they hurt. Her mind was a jumble of processing her loss and seeing the people in the house when she returned. She felt like she betrayed them by dying, making them worry, and she knew that they didn't mean for her to feel that. They cared about her.

Luca, like a brother, no, WAS a brother, her brother. Like Margot had been a sister, and Varian and Fern were her older brothers. Each departure was a pain she couldn't bear, but there was still something here to come back to, people that loved her].

S-sorry for worrying you guys.

Re: Video

[schoolingfish]

It's...

[He pauses, not sure what to say. It's not okay, of course. It's never okay when Luz gets hurt. He can't really try and tell her it's not her fault, because he knows she won't believe him. It also kind of is, but he knows she has reasons that she does dangerous things like that so he can't completely blame her. After a long pause, he finally speaks.]

You know you don't have to do stuff like that, right? We're kids. It's okay to stay where it's safe and let other people do the dangerous things.

Re: Video

[imaglyphwitch]

[Luz took a deep breath].

That's right Luca, you ARE kids. I wouldn't forgive myself if that Tyrant came to the house and started tearing you guys apart. It'd be one thing if Reaper was around, but he wasn't. So I wanted to help head off the thing with a team.

I wasn't trying to be reckless. I knew I couldn't take it on alone. I just underestimated its reach.

Video

[schoolingfish]

[It's obvious what she's doing. She's acting like she's not part of the 'just kids', like it falls on her to protect them, but it doesn't. It shouldn't.]

No, Luz. We are kids. You're one of the kids, just like us. We, you included, can leave that stuff to the adults.

Re: Video

[imaglyphwitch]

No. I can't.

You think I didn't do what you guys did before? When I first got to Deerington, Eda was there, and I met Margot, remember? I didn't have the staff then, and I was just getting a grip on my glyphs. I stayed home, and when I went out, I made friends.

And there were lots of kids out there, who've had lives worse than this. That's their reality. No adult swoops in to help them out, they have to help themselves. When Eda woke up and left, all I had from her was the staff, and I had to save myself after that. Margot was there, sure, but she was recovering, so I had to pick up some of the slack. Eventually? We came to Trench, and Varian and Fern offered me a place to stay. You know the rest. Margot never came with me. That family, that life I had, it ended.

And now Varian and Fern are gone, so no Luca, I'm NOT going to depend on adults to save us. YOU can leave stuff to adults, and I understand why. You deserve to have fun, because this place can be awful.

But I have glyph magic, I have a staff, and I'm smart and capable. When I can save people, I'm going to try. Because no one deserves to get killed off just for trying to make a life here.

Would you have ever told Varian and Fern not to go on some adventure because it was dangerous? Do you think they'd listen? I TRIED to insist Varian not go do something dangerous once, and that was after he DIED, and when you came back you had this horrible flu for a while. Do you think it stopped him?

[schoolingfish]

I...Luz...

[He doesn't know what to say to that. No, he doesn't think it stopped Varian. No, he doesn't think telling Fern and Varian not to do something dangerous would ever work. But...]

But you don't deserve to get killed off, either.

[imaglyphwitch]

[There was a lot he didn't say, and Luz didn't have to hear that: she felt it, because of the Bond. She also felt Ahiru's frustration too, and as much as she wanted to insist she was trying to do the right thing, a nagging voice reminded her that she had made a promise to someone, WAY at the beginning, that she wouldn't go off and do dangerous things to get herself killed.

Eda might not have been here, but she left Owlbert behind. She believed in her. No matter how Luz tried to rationalize it, in a way she was disobeying Eda. And Ahiru, Luca...they were the family here she had left].

Luca. Do you...really think I should take it easier?

[schoolingfish]

Yeah. I mean, I can't make you. If you insist on doing stuff like this...but...I know you have fancy powers and stuff, but you're not much older than me. And I'm getting more powers, too. I'm getting more control of the venom stuff. After a while we might not even be that different power wise.

[So she won't have that excuse of having more magic than he does, so being more capable of handling herself in a dangerous situation.]

[imaglyphwitch]

They aren't "fancy," Luca. Remember I had these before I even got here, and I had to learn how to use each and every one of them. The more glyphs and combinations I learn, the stronger they get.

[Well now Luz is a little offended].

Do you think this is a race to see who's stronger?

[schoolingfish]

Well, that was kind of your point, wasn't it? That you have to fight because you have a staff and glyph magic?

[Unless the 'smart and capable' was the part that she was saying she had that was different from them, but if that's the case it'll be his turn to be offended.

But with how this place works, we get our own magic. You're one of us. You're a kid. And you running off to fight or whatever is no different than if I did that.

[imaglyphwitch]

I wasn't run-

[Luz paused, because she looked down and saw that Tempest had her head in her lap, staring up at her. The look she was giving Luz was one that Luz would have recognized in the recesses of her memory: it was the look Eda had given her the first night, when she promised not to go off and get herself killed.

And thinking of that, Luz looked up at Luca a moment, feeling that Bond of theirs surging through her. In that instant, she realized that Luca reminded her of someone she hadn't seen in a long time, someone who would have objected to what she was doing and would have been angry she was second guessing their abilities.

She couldn't help thinking of Gus.

Luz looked down at her hands a moment, quietly thinking about the things that Luca was telling her, thinking about what had happened to her. THEN she started thinking about what Ahiru had said, and how Luz had tried to play off what was happening as a mistake.

She closed her eyes, sighing, and when she opened them again, they were glittering with tears].

You guys are just...worried about me, aren't you? And instead of realizing that, I'm explaining away what happened and thinking I have to protect you.

[She'd have been properly freaking out if Luca had done this and would have been all mother mode if he came back.

Like she'd been to Varian].

Okay. I won't do this again. From now on, when danger comes and one of us wants to go and do something, we talk to everyone about it, we make it clear how we feel.

We shouldn't make everyone in the house scared that they might die. We're what we have.

[schoolingfish]

Of course we're worried about you, Luz. You're our friend and we don't want you getting hurt.

[Or killed. Sure, getting killed is more like a minor injury people easily recover from in this place, but it's still traumatic and there's still that ever present fear that this time they won't come back.]

I think that's a good idea. That way if we decide to do something, we can decide what to do together.

[imaglyphwitch]

And you're my Bonded and I don't want YOU getting hurt either. So why don't we just try to meet each other halfway from now on? I'll stay at the house for a month, recovering, as a show of good faith.

[And Luz wanted to strengthen herself as well, physically and in her magic. She felt like she'd been feeling unfocused for far too long].

Exactly. I think it'll make Ahiru feel less frantic too.

[schoolingfish]

Okay, yeah! That sounds good to me! I mean, if you want to go out and do something fun with us, that's fine, because sometimes it might help to take your mind off of things, but...yeah! That'll work!

[Stay at the house and recover unless she wants to leave for non-stressful non-dangerous reasons.]

You're right. I think so, too.

[imaglyphwitch]

I'll do that then! Nothing crazy, nothing wild, just taking care of the animals and staying in the house and making us food and stuff! Also, practicing my magic!

[She still had glyphs to mess with, after all].

Oh, there is ONE other thing I am doing. It's less dangerous and more, ah, competitive? Going to that karate tournament to rep Ozpin's dojo I'm in. If you wanted to come, that'd be cool?

[schoolingfish]

Okay! That sounds great!

[He remembers hearing about that tournament. He remembers doing one of the training sessions with that, himself. He's not too worried about it. Sure, it had been scary and difficult, but there were adults watching over things and making sure nothing went too badly.]

Yeah! I'll come to cheer you on!

[After all, he's not trying to ground her with not wanting her to do dangerous things. He does want her to have fun. He just doesn't want her to die.]

[imaglyphwitch]

Awesome! Even if I lose, it'll be great to have you guys in the audience, cheering me and everyone else on!

[Luz would do her best, but she HAD been recovering from death and she was competing with people who had trained for some time. It would be difficult no matter how much stronger Luz had become.

As for grounding? Luz was grounding herself in this instance. The last thing she wanted was to make her remaining family scared she'd needlessly put herself in danger].

[schoolingfish]

Yeah! I can't wait to see how you do, it'll be fun!

[And since it's just a fun thing, he'll support her no matter how she does. Well, he'd do that no matter what, but in this case he'll just be happy that she got to to something to keep her mind off of all this regardless.]

[imaglyphwitch]

Aw, thanks! I'll do even better knowing you guys are rooting for me!

[Oh, it will, but after this, there'll be something else to definitely someone else being a good distraction for her]!

[schoolingfish]

Great! I'm glad we can help! I can't wait to see you compete!

[imaglyphwitch]

Cool!

Hey, that reminds me. I have a place in mind I want to take you and Ahiru. Will you humor me and go, and then I'll treat you guys to ice cream and the arcade?

[schoolingfish]

Okay!

[Two things he loves, how could he say no?]

And where is the place? Or is it a surprise?

[imaglyphwitch]

Great!

No, I'll tell you since Ahiru knows already. There's a new bookstore in Trench I want to take you both to! I met the girl in charge and she's super nice and wants nothing more than to get people all cozy in her store reading and recommending books!

[schoolingfish]

Oh, wow!

[Make that three things he loves.]

I'd love to go! I can't wait to see all the books she has! I wonder if she has any about space. Or science. Or strange new places and other worlds!

[As if showing up in the Trench shouldn't have been 'new world' enough for him, but that doesn't mean he can't always be fascinated by thoughts of other places.]