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[ video -> voice | un: keith ]

[The video was brief, kind of like that moment when you activated the camera on your phone and forgot it was in selfie mode. The omni shook and rotated, leaving the viewer with a dizzying array of scenery that was kind of blurry and hard to make out. It was dark, though, like the person broadcasting was in a closed room with no lights on.

As the video shifted, glimpses of a person could be seen. A hand... the fingernails-turned-claws bitten down short as if trying to cover the transformation... a burn scar on the right side of a face... dark, almost black, hair with a purple tint, long-ish, shaggy looking, a thin white streak with a extremely slight violet hue to it near the left temple... pale skin... deep cobalt eyes that looked exhausted with dark tired bruises underneath from lack of sleep...]

Shit-...

[And the video was gone. It was just voice now, Keith's voice, but raspier than usual, worn sounding, loaded with regret and guilt and just... sad.]

I um... [He was hesitant. Unsure.] I wanted to... apologize. [His tone faltered, like he was searching for words, having trouble forming them and getting them out.] I... I did a lot of stuff last month. Just um... Yeah. The Reckoning took care of it.

But... if you still want... you know. Fine. I understand. I won't stop you.

[And then the feed shut off.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

'if you still want' what, Keith?

[Sir you are doing him a heckin concern!!!]

[It took a long time for Keith to be able to really come out with it. Especially to Shiro.]

Revenge Retribution Whatever

No. That's not happening. Who said they want that?

Shouldnt it tho No one said it specifically But its there I fucked up shiro I need to pay for that

You already said 'the Reckoning took care of it'. That's enough. No question.

And people who dont feel the reckoning acts for them

[Part of this was Keith seeking something more... direct... than just some Pthumerian justice for what he did while possessed by something evil.]

What about them

Edited 2022-08-17 06:01 (UTC)

[The feed switches, then. Abruptly. Because this isn't something that he wants to be left in text. Let it be out there for anyone to read.]

Then then can deal with me.

[There is no arguing with that particular Shiro tone.]

Any of them who have a problem, they deal with me. I've been in this damn situation for four years, Keith. I have seen what the Dream, what this Waking World, can do to people. And it has never been their fault they fell under some spell, some compulsion.

I'll tell them the same thing.

So they can deal with me.

Shiro-...

[Keith's voice was shaky and raspy. No. No. This wasn't supposed to happen.]

You can't. Okay? You can't... I can't...

[His voice got muffled as he put his head in his hands.]

I don't... I don't want you to do that for me.

Because you'd rather beat yourself up for something out of your control?

[Sir do you hear yourself?]

Edited (wording) 2022-08-19 04:42 (UTC)

I'm not. I'm letting others get what they need out of it.

[He was letting them beat him up, Shiro. See? It's different.]

And what if what they need is you, alive, unharmed?

You're not doing this, Keith.

Obviously, I'm not gonna stay dead, so I don't see why it makes a difference!

[Okay, that came out stronger than intended... Keith physically recoiled from the Omni, even if Shiro couldn't see it. He'd surprised himself with the venom in his own voice.]

It -

[He pauses, dragging his hand down his face. Through his hair.]

So then it wouldn't make a difference if I decided to do the same thing. Would it?

That's-!

[Keith cut himself off with a choked sound.

That wasn't fair. He wanted to say it wasn't the same, but... well, it was, wasn't it? Or... was it? Keith clenched his teeth for a second.]

You're a different person. [His voice came out as a rough whisper, shaking.] You're not me. You're better than that. It would make a difference. More people care about you.

So much "better" that I let myself turn into a monster?

[Another silence. A steadying breath.]

Because 'more people' care, it means the ones who do want to see you safe don't matter?

No... [Keith sounded close to crying. There were a few heavy breaths.] It just means less people would be affected, so it's not as big of a deal. [He sniffed.]

That doesn't make it any better. Or right.

[He's still as firm as ever, but his tone is quieter. Gentler.]

Where are you right now?

[There was a wooden thunk as Keith dropped his omni on the floor. He didn't disconnect, but he just had both hands wrapped around his head right now as he was trying to keep himself from falling apart.]

In the barn loft...

[His answer was quiet.]

Okay. Okay, stay put. I'm going to come see you, all right?

[A moment's pause, before he adds:]

And I'm not angry. Not with you. Trust me on that?

Mm-hm...

[That was about all he could muster in the way of a response at the moment...]

Stay put. On my way.

[Hauling himself out of bed, out of the house. He could take the bike, but that requires more balance than he actually has right now. So - the Lion it is. If the robot has a problem with it, there's no sense of it. Especially since it's Keith who needs a hand.]

[It... takes longer than it probably would otherwise, but eventually, he's at the barn. Edging the door open.]

... Keith?

[Keith honestly had no intentions of leaving. He curled up into a ball, pressed into the corner of some haybales. When Shiro came in, Kosmo teleported down to meet him. He wagged his tail slowly, kind of weakly. He was concerned for Keith. The wolf nudged at the door to get Shiro to come inside before pressing against the man's leg, ready to teleport him up to the loft if he needed it.]

Hey, buddy. [There's a real flicker of a smile, seeing Kosmo. And Shiro leans into him for a second, reaching out to scratch those ears.] Good boy.

Here to give me a lift?

[He'll bring you some treats for this, pupper.]

[Kosmo looked up at Shiro from where he stood, pressed against him, and gave another small wag of his tail. It was all the warning Shiro would get before-

FLASH

-they were in the loft.

Keith didn't even look up.

Kosmo whined a little, lowering his head and going over to give Keith a nudge in his side.]

[You know, that never gets any less disorienting. But hey, at least now the clothes come with them. He staggers for a second, reaching out a hand to brace against a beam before continuing.]

[A couple steps, and he drops down to sit cross-legged next to Keith.]

Hey. You don't have to talk yet... but I'm here. When you're ready.

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