Video; un: darkness

[survivalthroughhate]

[The video turns on and it's Maul, using his omen Venge to broadcast it. He looks serious like he's about to talk to Trench about a topic of great importance.]

For those unaware, this is the time of year when the Pthumerian or half-Pthumerian known as Santa Claus comes to Trench towards the end of the month. He can shift into many forms to fit into your home but most often looks like this.

[Venge, his Omen, turns to look at the picture that has been sketched of a fairly traditional 21st century Santa Maul has set up next to him. Yes, this presentation comes with pictures, all made by Maul himself]

Santa is one of the more benevolent Pthumerians though he is possessed of much stealth and cunning, making it difficult for people to interact with him. He is associated with deer as Sodder was but his chosen favored deer are reindeer. He uses his powers to make them fly.

[Another picture, this time showing the team of flying reindeer that looks like it was copied from an illustration of 'Twas The Night Before Christmas. This one is a little rougher, especially the reindeer, for drawing animals isn't Maul's forte.]

He loves the scent of pine and prefers if there are wreaths or full trees made of them left in the home when he visits. Those who leave him offerings of food and drink he will reward with presents. The offerings can be small such as this.

[Again, another picture showing a glass of milk and plate of cookies are shown with an equal sign followed by a small stack of presents underneath a Christmas tree that has been decorated rather....oddly with things like animal skulls and black ornaments on it.]

But he also accepts larger offerings if you wish for larger gifts. There appears to be no known way to prevent him from entering your homes but he doesn't appear to seem interested in causing harm to people, even those who fail to provide him hospitality. I have yet to run into him personally the past two years, but if anyone sees him, please let me know. I wish to test my fighting skills against him.

[.............Yes, Darth Maul just said he wants to fight Santa Claus. Will wonders never cease?]

Comments

(VOICE) — UN: BOMBSHELL

[opheliac]

Would an animal count as a larger offering? The ugly ones, not the cute ones.

[survivalthroughhate]

That is very likely. Just don't make it a deer. I don't think he would like that.

un: GoldenFlowers, video

[the_obedient_servant]

...Santa Claus is just my father in a costume. Or at least that's what he was in my old world - though I was the only one able to see through his disguise for some reason.

Are you saying there is a different entity operating under this identity in this world?

[survivalthroughhate]

Probably because you know everything.

[He doesn't say the words maliciously, just more of a teasing tone. Look, Maul has two 12 year olds he now knows who seem to know everything, so he might as well get in his jabs where he can.]

That is exactly what I am saying. Though I find it fascinating the idea of this Pthumerian transcends universes.

text, un: kickflips

[strongroots]

[ Robby has to stare at this for a good few seconds. Maybe even a minute.

Because...this has to be a bit, right. A bit for the kids. Being told very seriously, because that's what kids deserve if they believe in Santa Claus. Or... is it? Or is it.

...is it?

...Robby isn't going to fight this (like the way Maul wants to fight Santa Claus). You know what? This is actually welcoming compared to some other network posts. ]

never heard of santa claus being a fighting type
even when you get on his naughty list you get coal or nothing

looks like hes put you on the good list before though

Text; un: darkness

[survivalthroughhate]

I had heard of his custom of leaving coal before but did not know it was for those who were bad!

[Hmmmm, suddenly what Willow told him last month takes on a different light.]

Why coal? Is this some strange part of the custom as well?

[Yep, Maul seems to be taking this as serious as a heart attack.]

voice; un: naruhodo

[convene]

I'm not sure I like the idea of a Pthumerian being able to enter my home.

[Ryunosuke has never heard of Santa Claus - at least as far as he's aware of. He hadn't celebrated the holiday with anyone from England leaving the country in November, and the story hadn't quite made it's way to Japan's shores.]

You...want to fight him? [He doesn't know Maul either so he's genuinely surprised.]

[survivalthroughhate]

They probably do it already without us knowing they are doing it.

[Just for that extra dose of paranoia.]

Why not? Someone that stealthy and able to shapeshift would certainly make a good opponent.

text | un: cleansingsong

[baiyueguang]

[He stares at this for a good, long while. What a bizarre entity! Almost whimsical! ...And yet the idea of having this bizarre deity creeping around the house doing heavens know what while they sleep...]

I will ask A-Yao to help me strengthen the warding talismans around the siheyuan.

text | un: wheninlanling

[poorlittlesange]

[this is a concerning development from a number of different angles. Jin Guangyao does not like this one bit.]

Er-ge, won't we risk offending the Pthumerian if we forbid him entry?

[this is worrying!!]

Voice | un: justafarmlad

[justoscar]

This is the most detailed analysis I've seen yet!

[Laughter was in Oscar's voice as he spoke-- he had been tracking details on Santa Clause is weird.]

The Earth People know him pretty well, usually. They might even call him a fairy, but that's no reason for him not to be a Pthumerian!

I think a few others want to fight him. You should look into teaming up with them.

[survivalthroughhate]

Anyone with as much power as he has is definitely a Pthumerian.

[Maul feels his logic on this subject is completely irrefutable.]

I shall then. It will be a glorious battle.

[ voice - un: keith ]

[tempredmental]

You want to fight... Santa...?

[survivalthroughhate]

Why not? Anyone possessed of that much stealth and cunning will make a fine opponent!

[Video][UN: A_Wesker013][OTA] [CW: Fantasy misanthropy discussed]

[subject_013]

[Wesker appears on camera, in the now snowy courtyard garden behind Arklay House, depositing some trash into the blaze in the firepit there.]

He also appears to have a companion after a fashion, another Pthumerian or half-Pthumerian known as Krampus, a tall creature with the horns, face, and legs of a goat and as far as we can tell, a humanoid body under the red and black robes it wore. It appeared last year about this time, running about the rooftops of the city and leaping down to chase people through the back streets and alleys, swiping at them with a broom. A few Trench folk reported that it caught them and carried them away, leaving them stranded on roofs or in other nooks. It seems the Trench folk most apt to look down on folk with Vileblood or Warmblood would be most likely to end up stuck and in need of assistance. However, it seemed at times that this intruder would harry anyone that crossed its path, perhaps for sport, perhaps to punish them.

[Looking directly into the camera now.]

If I were any of you, I would mend my ways and treat the folk with Vileblood and Warmblood no differently than anyone with any other Blood type, lest Krampus emerge again.

[fogsong]

[ she cannot tell if he's just making shit up ]

Wait, for real?

video | un: sds

[fogsong]

[ for all of her sour mood lately, this still puts a grin on her face. this is the only santa she believes in now ]

Did you know his reindeer have names? And the one that leads them all has a glowing nose that helps light the way and protect them all from any snowstorms they have to travel through! [ he has to learn about rudolph! ]

[survivalthroughhate]

[Maul nods in an enthusiastic manner.]

This makes perfect sense! What are all of their names?

voice: un: vi

[faceblocks]

Would he trade you those cookies for a fight? Or would that require a bigger gift?

We've got a permanent tree in the house, but it isn't pine. What kinda gifts you get before?

[survivalthroughhate]

I recommend a bigger offering if one wishes to receive more from him than the traditional gifts.

[Maul is now going to consider himself the authority on all things Santa Claus related.]

Books for the most part. A well-appreciated gift given my perchance for reading.

private message to Darth Maul

[xiaoxiuya]

It's Shen Yuan. I will literally bribe and beg you to tell me if this is a joke or not if that's what it takes. My housemates come from a culture that doesn't include Santa Claus and they're about to lose their goddamn minds over a potential home invasion.

[survivalthroughhate]

Oh, but this is very serious, Shen Yuan. Santa Claus is no joke even if he is one of the more gentle Pthumerians. I don't want anyone caught unawares when he comes forth this year.

text: un: tenskulls 1/2

[stayscared]

[his first inclination is to laugh. at the whole thing. but he'd seen the headless horseman, as much as he wanted to deny that fact - and even if the thing had changed shape a bit. he'd seen it. it's not the afterlife. he might be dead or in a coma, but there's more to this world than his own brain spinning a tale, so ...why is this so hard to accept? it's fucking hilarious, and he'd like to say 'oh, bullshit' about it all but.

(headless horseman. necromancer. lighthouse. adventures in air vents. architecture. vampires. videotapes. soup.)

he had let katie figure it out herself, hadn't he? he would have never, even then, told her it was all made up. and maybe it's not a lie here. let's not kill the wonder for everyone.]

Ever try to wait up all night and catch him in the act? Or his he too stealthy for that, too?

[survivalthroughhate]

[With the amount of people who are going to end up believing in a Pthumerian Santa Claus, they very well might just will him into existences at this rate.]

I have tried but been unsuccessful. Perhaps we keep missing each other as I have my own gifts to deliver to people that night the same way he does. Or I just fall asleep too soundly to notice him in my home.

text; un: DELMIRA 2/2 private

[stayscared]

I will trade you mushrooms for a tree!

[survivalthroughhate]

What kind of mushrooms? I am afraid most normal kinds don't give very much nutrition to my brother or I given we're carnivores.

video; un: lady

[dohaeris]

[sansa looks more amused than concerned, in her thick woolen black dress embroidered with ravens, but the concern is there.]

Oh, this is an old Earth legend. [or it used to be...sansa thinks it equally likely a pthumerian heard about it and decided to either embody it or will it into existence.] Raleigh told me about it. He lives in their Land of Always Winter. I don't think you fight him.

[they were, of course, comparing lands of always winter at the time.]

It's meant to reward children for good behavior and teach them about guest right. If you're kind and give him bread and salt, he'll leave you a gift. It's nicer than telling them horrible creatures will take them away for being bad.

[survivalthroughhate]

Raleigh knew much about Earth and their odd customs.
[Including the fact that Maul and rest of the people from his universe were in a fictional movies series in his world. That one had really knocked him for a loop.]

I miss him and his boyfriend too.

That is not the worst way to teach children and even adults to respect guests that turn up on their doorstep. Well, according to my brother, there is another Pthumerian that works in tandem with him who punishes those who are wicked named Krampus.

un: eudaimonikos; text

[eudaimonikos]

This is all completely accurate on my Earth.

[it absolutely is not!!!]

Except the Pthumerian part, obviously, he's just a regular immortal there.

[survivalthroughhate]

I knew it. Of course the story all starts to make sense the longer one thinks about it.

[Do it, Michael, continue to help spread the story of Pthumerian Santa Claus!]

There is such a thing as a "regular" immortal?

video; un: kolckek

[hearuthinking]

You're tellin' me that Santa is fuckin real in this place? And you want to fight him? What the fuck for? He's just a guy who gives presents to kids.

[survivalthroughhate]

Of course. Why wouldn't he be?

[Trench is definitely insane enough to have a real version of Santa Claus.]

He's still a Pthumerian and one possessed of much stealth and cunning, making him a fine opponent to face. With his good nature, I don't think he'd much mind it much if I challenged him to combat.

Video; UN Lothrat

[ezra_of_lothal]

[Ezra is clearly struggling not to laugh.]

Ok. [Another deep breath of trying not to laugh.]

Ok. I have to ask - did you get this from the locals, or entirely from other Sleepers?

[survivalthroughhate]

[Meanwhile Maul is over here as serious as the grave.]

A little of both. I was told of the basics by some Sleepers who have him as a presence in their worlds and then my followers filled me in on the rest.

Video | Clickclickbloom

[onekindsoul]

[Ruby looks incredibly serious when the feed opens up. But her tone is a light and joking.]

Alright Maul.
I think it's time to put aside any differences we might have and join together.
We have a common enemy it would seem.
This Santa Claus has had a monopoly on the cookie game for too long.
I say this year we catch him.

un: kickflips, text

[strongroots]

sounds like someone wants cookies and milk

you know you can write to santa and ask for them

Video; UN: Cuddlebunny

[lightthedarkness]

You're not allowed to fight Santa.

[survivalthroughhate]

Why not?

text (un: countrymouse)

[overlies]

I personally knew a Santa Claus.

[survivalthroughhate]

You do?

[Consider Maul highly interested now!]

video | un: sharpshooter

[azurestar]

[Lance's expression is flat as he just stares for a minute.]

I caaan't tell if someone trolled you or you're the one trolling.

[survivalthroughhate]

This is a very serious subject.

[Just look at that face. Maul is as serious as if this is a matter of life-and-death.]

Think about all the people from other worlds who don't know about Santa. They might be alarmed if he suddenly appears in their house one night!