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Text | un: carcinoGeneticist | Per Romance

AS SOME PERSONAL ADVICE, SINCE APPARENTLY THIS PLACE IS ABSOLUTELY *INFESTED* WITH HUMANS, I NEED TO INFORM THE MAJORITY OF YOU HOW HUMILIATINGLY SIMPLIFIED YOUR UNDERSTANDING OF ROMANCE IS.

LIKE, SERIOUSLY, IT'S EMBARRASSING, AND SEEING CONSTANT OBLIVIOUS ATTITUDES ABOUT PERFECTLY HEALTHY SOCIAL DYNAMICS MAKES ME WANT TO BE SHOT DIRECTLY INTO EVERY SUN THAT HAS EVER EXISTED AT THE SAME TIME. I SWEAR HALF OF YOU ARE GOING TO DIE ALONE AND IT WILL BE ENTIRELY YOUR OWN FAULT BECAUSE HUMANS ARE SO GODDAMN INCOMPETENT AT THEIR OWN EMOTIONAL SPECTRUM. I HAVE NEVER SEEN A COLLECTIVE SPECIES MORE HELLBENT ON SELF-DESTRUCTION BASED ON NEGLECTING THEIR OWN NATURAL FEELINGS.

I AM AWARE THAT I AM PROBABLY EXTENSIVELY INSULTING YOU NOW INSTEAD OF HELPING YOU. ALL RIGHT, I NEED TO SHUT THE FUCK UP AND GET TO THE POINT BEFORE HALF OF YOU HAVE GLAZED OVER. IF YOU'RE STILL READING THIS, CONGRATULATIONS ON THE FUNCTIONING BRAIN CELLS, REALLY PROUD OF YOU FOR MAKING IT THIS FAR IN AN EXTREMELY SHORT TEXT. LET'S GET ON WITH IT.

FIRST LESSON: YOU HAVE YOUR EMOTIONS FOR A *REASON*. I DO NOT KNOW WHY YOU ALL INSIST ON BURYING EVERY SINGLE NATURAL INSTINCT YOU HAVE LIKE IT'S A HOT PIECE OF SHIT OF SHAME YOU JUST SQUATTED OUT IN FRONT OF EVERYONE.

THE GENERAL RULE OF THUMB IS: IF YOUR EMOTIONS FOCUS ON BETTERING YOURSELF, THEY ARE GOOD. IF THEY SERVE TO KEEP SOMEONE ELSE FROM BETTERING THEMSELVES, THEY ARE BAD.

IN MY CULTURE, THE IDEAL ROMANCE INVOLVES BEING THE BEST VERSION OF YOURSELF POSSIBLE THROUGH YOUR CONNECTIONS TO OTHERS. IN A PERFECT WORLD, YOU HELP YOUR PARTNERS AS MUCH AS THEY HELP YOU AND IT BECOMES THIS BEAUTIFUL SYMBIOTIC SITUATION WHERE EVERYONE CAN MUTUALLY BENEFIT FROM THEIR PERSONAL DYNAMICS.

WHICH LEADS ME TO THE SECOND LESSON: I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHY HUMANS HAVE THIS EXTREMELY NARROW, SPECIFIC IDEA OF ROMANCE. THERE IS A MULTITUDE OF WAYS TO BE ROMANTICALLY INVOLVED WITH PEOPLE. THERE ARE DIFFERENT WAYS TO LOVE PEOPLE, SO WHY REFUSE THE DIFFERENT KINDS OF RELATIONSHIPS YOU FOCUS ON? WHY PUT ONE RELATIONSHIP ON A PEDESTAL AND LET ALL YOUR OTHER RELATIONSHIPS SUFFER BECAUSE OF IT? THAT ISN'T HEALTHY NO MATTER WHICH QUADRANT YOUR CULTURE IS OBSESSED WITH.

THIRD LESSON: WHERE I COME FROM, WE HAVE ROMANTIC QUADRANTS. LEARN THEM AND BENEFIT FROM THEIR EXISTENCE. YOU ARE SO FUCKING WELCOME AT HOW MUCH THEY WILL DRASTICALLY IMPROVE YOUR SHITTY LIFE AND HOW MUCH SENSE THEY WILL MAKE TO YOUR VARIOUS RELATIONSHIPS:

MATESPRITSHIP: THE FLUSHED QUADRANT IS PROBABLY THE CLOSEST THING TO "TRADITIONAL" HUMAN LOVE. THIS IS AN INDIVIDUAL WHO YOU HAVE STRONG POSITIVE EMOTIONS TOWARDS THAT PROVIDES YOU WITH PLEASURABLE EXPERIENCES BOTH EMOTIONALLY AND PHYSICALLY (NOT TO GET TOO NC-17 HERE). THIS IS YOUR MATESPRIT.

MOIRALLEGIANCE: THE PALE QUADRANT IS ALSO A POSITIVE DYNAMIC, HOWEVER, THIS RELATIONSHIP TYPICALLY FOCUSES ON BEING THERE TO PROVIDE ABSOLUTE AND COMPLETE EMOTIONAL SUPPORT TO YOUR PARTNER. IT INVOLVES BEING ABLE TO RECOGNIZE THEIR FLAWS, HELP THEM BE THE BEST VERSION OF THEMSELVES, AND THEM TO DO THE SAME FOR YOU. YOU CALM THEM DOWN WHEN THEY ARE WORKED UP, YOU KEEP THEM SAFE FROM THEMSELVES AND OTHERS. THIS IS YOUR MOIRAIL OR PALEMATE.

KISMESISSITUDE: THE BLACK QUADRANT IS RELIANT ON PURELY NEGATIVE EMOTIONS. THIS IS ABOUT THE HATRED AND ANIMOSITY YOU FEEL TOWARDS ANOTHER. THE KEY HERE IS THAT THIS IS EXTREMELY MUTUAL, WELL-BALANCED, HEALTHY HATRED. MEANING YOU ARE ACTUAL EQUALS IN TERMS OF STRENGTH OR INTELLECTUALITY OR SOMETHING. THE POINT IS *NOT* TO KILL OR DEFEAT YOUR KISMESIS, BUT TO CONSTANTLY CHALLENGE EACH OTHER INTO A BETTER VERSION OF YOURSELVES THROUGH RIVALRY. ALSO YOU PROBABLY WANT TO FUCK THEM. SORRY. THAT'S JUST HOW IT GOES. IT IS EXTREMELY COMMON WHERE I COME FROM FOR THE BLACK AND FLUSHED QUADRANTS TO CONTINUALLY SWITCH. THEY ARE AS EQUALLY ESSENTIAL TO YOUR WELL-BEING SINCE THEY KEEP YOU ON YOUR FUCKING TOES AND RESPECT YOU IN WAYS THE OTHER QUADRANTS MIGHT NOT UNDERSTAND.

THIS RELATIONSHIP IS QUITE TUMULTUOUS. AND IT CAN BE VERY UNHEALTHY IF THINGS ARE UNBALANCED BETWEEN THE TWO WHICH IS BASICALLY WHY WE HAVE...

AUSPISTICISM: THE ASHEN QUADRANT. THIS IS LESS OF A ROMANTIC QUADRANT BUT RATHER A DEALING OF ROMANCE. THIS IS A WILLING THIRD PARTY STEPPING IN TO WILLINGLY HELP FACILITATE A RELATIONSHIP BETWEEN OTHERS. THIS IS CRUCIAL IN OUR SOCIETY TO ENSURE ALL OF YOUR PARTNERS AND RELATIONSHIPS ARE ACTUALLY HEALTHY AND FUNCTIONING. THE AUSPISTICE IS NOT NECESSARILY ROMANTICALLY INVOLVED IN THE OTHER PARTIES, BUT IT ISN'T UNCOMMON TO SEE AN AUSPISTICE WHO IS LONGING FOR ONE OF THE PARTIES AND IS HOPING THE ASHEN QUADRANT MIGHT GIVE THEM A LEVERAGE TO ANOTHER RELATIONSHIP.

AND THAT IS THE SHORT AND SWEET VERSION OF IT. YES, IT IS WILDLY COMPLEX AND YES HEARTBREAK IS ABSOLUTELY FUCKING FROTHING AT THE BRIM IN OUR CULTURE. QUADRANT VACILLATION IS A RAMPANT PROBLEM THAT MAKES IT DIFFICULT TO SORT OUT WHAT QUADRANT FITS YOUR RELATIONSHIP BEST. IT IS PERFECTLY NATURAL TO FEEL AND IT IS FINE IF YOU HAVE A PARTNER WHO FITS ALL QUADRANTS BUT YOU SHOULD REALLY CLARIFY THAT KIND OF THING SO YOU CAN BOTH BE ON THE SAME PAGE.

I'M NOT REALLY INTERESTED IN BEING THE TOWN AUSPISTICE, BY THE WAY. I DON'T GIVE A SHIT ABOUT YOUR INDIVIDUAL RELATIONSHIPS. BUT AS A RULE, I CARE ABOUT RELATIONSHIPS IN GENERAL AND IT IS SINCERE TORTURE TO THINK ABOUT HOW MANY IDIOTS ARE WALKING AROUND DENYING THEIR OWN FEELINGS. IT MAKES ME WANT TO SCREAM.

WHICH I HAVE ALREADY DONE SO MANY TIMES NOW.

BUT YES I WILL OPEN THE FLOOR TO GENERAL QUESTIONS ABOUT YOUR PROBABLE ROMANTIC AWAKENINGS THIS POST WILL NO DOUBT AROUSE. THERE IS NO SHAME IN REALIZING YOU HAVE HAD A TOTAL HATE-BONER FOR SOMEONE FOR TEN YEARS AND ARE PROBABLY IN SOME KIND OF LOVE WITH THEM. IDIOT.

OKAY BEFORE I WRITE ANOTHER SHORT ESSAY, I AM ACTUALLY GOING TO SHUT THE FUCK UP NOW.

EDIT BY FUTURE CARCINOGENETICIST @ 3:25 AM

WOW, I AM SO FUCKING INEPT AT THIS SOMEONE REVOKED MY FUCKING ROMANCE GURU CARD THAT I DON'T ACTUALLY HAVE.

I FORGOT THE CARDINAL LESSON FOR HUMANITY BECAUSE YOU ALL HAVE THIS WILD FUCKING OBSESSION WITH GENDER: YOU ARE NOT "BROKEN" OR WHAT THE FUCK EVER KIND OF BRAINWASHING YOUR KIND HAS PUT YOU THROUGH...IF YOU LIKE THE SAME GENDER YOU IDENTIFY AS. HOLY FUCK. OR MULTIPLE GENDERS. OR NO GENDERS. ATTRACTION IS A GODDAMN SPECTRUM AND WE FEEL IT AS SUCH FOR A REASON. BECAUSE! IT'S! MOTHERFUCKING NATURAL! IF YOU DON'T FEEl ATTRACTION LITERALLY NOTHING ABOUT YOU NEEDS TO BE CHANGED. IF YOU'RE HORNED UP, IT'S FUCKING FINE AS LONG AS YOU'RE NOT A MONSTER ABOUT IT. JEGUS.

OKAY NOW I'M DONE.

Threaded | Top-Level Comments Only

not so sure i'd say most emotions do any kind of betterment
they tend to be a pain in the ass more than they aren't

[Having a Lot Of Feelings was a big part of the reason he struggled with the whole Clover situation for so long, back in Deerington.]

Edited (good job at reading comprehension, me) 2021-11-02 09:22 (UTC)

[Yep, this is Neo. Being a little punk.]

uh wow dude
we had lots of different kinds of relationship in Ooo but all of this sounds crazy complicated
oh my Glob, i can barely handle dating one guy sometimes i don't know how anyone could do all of this

[Maybe someone who isn't emotionally volatile could? But that certainly isn't him.]

are there like just constant disasters going on all the time?

A lover, a best friend, a rival, and a mediator, in other words.

If you didn't want to be the town 'Auspistice' making a post about this wasn't very smart.

for anybody reading this, i as a completely ordinary human can attest that the troll romance system can actually be really useful. if you've had a hard time in life navigating interpersonal relationships because human society really does have a narrow view of how we can relate to each other, it's nice to consider a broader perspective. it can put things in a different light.

at the risk of getting personal, karkat has explained this stuff to me before, and i can look back at my life and see how this model of loving people would have saved me from a lot of confusion and guilt.

but you absolutely do not have to want to fuck your kismesis karkat oh my god fuck you

You mean, my feelings for the person I thought I had a crush on but who adopted me as a sibling are completely normal??

THAT'S SO COOL!!

Edited 2021-11-02 12:47 (UTC)

[ Ford usually has to go digging and asking pointed questions to get information like this, and now there's someone just babbling on about it on the network with no prompting?

Trench kind of sucks, but it definitely has its upside. ]

Is there a biological or evolutionary imperative behind this particular type of social grouping? Or is it a primarily cultural phenomena?

Damn.
You needed to invent a whole new word for getting so mad at someone that you wanna press them up against the wall and fuck them?
How horny is your planet?

[Wow.

That's a lot for someone who literally just learned what humans considered normal love a few days ago and found it overwhelming. And yet, at the same time it makes sense. Humans behave too strangely for love to be so singular.]

Perhaps humans do experience all of those things but have no words for them. Their hearts are filled with emotions and feelings they don't understand. That's why they're confused and burdened.

D --> One Lunar calendar month
D --> This t00k e%actly one lunar calendar month after you were deposited on the beach to write
D --> I am actually impressed that you held out for a full month before e%pounding upon a desire to serve as the domicile's collective Auspitisce
D --> Deny this propensity all that you wish but the human that responded suggesting you intend to become this is probably correct
D --> Ironically you will protest the whole time unlike the Jade bl00d
D --> Kanaya is much more public in her meddling in their collective affairs

D --> Still I am moderately impressed at the STRENGTH of your patience that you waited this long
D --> You even argued with yourself only once
D --> This collective disaster of a post may proceed slightly less pathetically tragically before you descend into apra%ia of the limbs and flail about in abject irritation
D --> I will endeavor not to watch the train wreck t00 closely

D --> I do not have enough towels for that

[Every aspect of this is fascinating, from the original post on down to the replies.]

These romance quadrants--do they encompass every way your people might relate to each other? Is typical, that you only have one of each, or one--what is your word--vacillating across each?

You ask me, romance is the biggest waster of time and energy known to any sentient being. If someone wants sentimental devotion, they can get a pet animal. If they want offspring, in my world, there are biotechnological options to allow one to reproduce without having to bother with finding a partner and all the emotional baggage which accompanies that process. I swear humanity would have already colonized other planets in our solar system and/or found cures for various terminal and disabling medical conditions by now, if they had lower sex drives or better ways to redirect that energy toward bettering the species.

I say this from the viewpoint of a genetically enhanced transhuman, though one could argue I am a post-human.

This is... actually really fascinating. I've never really thought about how romance works with other alien species before... ... well, except for one, but they seemed to act as if their species only cared about hatred and saw any other feelings as "mushy and gross human worm baby nonsense".

[But now he has to wonder if some of Zim's attempts on his life were... attempts at flirting?? God, hopefully not, given that Dib killed him and has the other's brain attached to his own now, so this is a level of inquiry he did not need to examine closely today...]

[ Oh, hello. This post woke him right up. ]

You're right. There are many different kinds of love, and they express themselves in different ways. To identify and sort them into specific quadrants is quite a smart mood indeed! You're correct that humans often lack a nuanced view of romance... It's truly tragic, isn't it? It's such a waste.

However, you shouldn't misunderstand and take this to mean that human romance is something so simple as two people loving each other! It's quite the opposite, I assure you. There's nothing quite as complicated as the connections that sentient, self-realized beings form with each other. I'm sure it's the same for you, yes? There must be so many different ways that relationships express themselves within those four quadrants, and while they may be similar, no two are quite the same... Oh, but I"m making too many assumptions about a culture I'm not familiar with, aren't I? I apologize.

Then, I suppose I should talk about what I do know. Human relationships, and even romance, can be divided into the quadrants you mentioned. There are people who love each other, there are those who uplift one another and push them, there are those who hate each other and yet are bonded, and of course there are counselors who support on their journey... Yet, there are so many more!

Humans will form a romance for any reason. They'll lie to themselves and pretend to be in love for the sake of any benefit they can tear from the grasps of their partner. They'll pretend they're in a romance to console themselves while being torn apart by their partner, or otherwise as they tear themselves apart. They'll destroy their entire lives for the sake of others and call it love! They'll tear apart and break and kill those that they love the most all for the sake of preserving that romance.

Then of course, there's people who practice polyamory or have open relationships as well - you need not confine yourself to one person.

It's such a shame that so many choose to boil it down to such a simple and frivolous thing! There's nothing more complicated, nor anything more fascinating, than the concepts of love and romance. It creates and destroys everything.

But I have no doubt that you already know that. I hope you'll forgive my assumptions, but your culture seems as though it encourages its people to be far more in tune with their feelings. What a wonderful view of romance! Ah, I do wish humans were more honest with themselves...

Edited 2021-11-03 02:10 (UTC)

Geez, and I thought human romance was overly complicated.

EMOTIONS ARE THE FOUNDATION OF CIVILIZED SOCIETIES. WITHOUT THEM PEOPLE WOULD NOT GIVE ENOUGH OF A FUCK ABOUT EACH OTHER TO ESTABLISH IMPORTANT CONNECTIONS.

MAYBE YOU'RE JUST WILDLY INCOMPETENT AT EXPRESSING YOUR EMOTIONS.

(There are probably nicer ways to say this, but he's helping...!)

WHAT IN THE FRESH FUCKERY IS THIS?

YOU CAN DO ALL OF IT WHEN YOU VALUE YOUR CONNECTIONS AND WANT THE BEST FOR WHO YOU CARE ABOUT IN YOUR LIFE. IT IS PERFECTLY NATURAL TO WANT TO FEEL FULFILLED IN A VARIETY OF WAYS AND SOMETIMES YOU WANT DIFFERENT PEOPLE FOR THOSE FULFILLMENTS.

GRANTED, THERE ARE PLENTY OF TIMES WHERE YOU CAN FIND ONE INDIVIDUAL WHO SOMEHOW MANAGES TO MAKE YOU FEEL AS THOUGH ALL QUADRANTS HAVE BEEN FULFILLED. BUT THAT IS NOT COMMON.

YES, ABSOLUTELY. TROLL ROMANCE IS VERY CHAOTIC AND INVOLVED. IT REQUIRES AN ENORMOUS AMOUNT OF COMMUNICATION SKILLS AND TRUST TO BE SUCCESSFUL AT IT.

SURE, ONLY WITH ROMANCE FOR ALL OF THOSE. THE HUMAN CONCEPT OF "BEST FRIEND" IS NOT THAT SIMILAR TO A TROLL'S MOIRAIL. I HAVE BEST FRIENDS AND THEN I HAD MY MOIRAIL AND THOSE RELATIONSHIPS WERE COMPLETELY DIFFERENT. WHEN YOU HAVE A BEST FRIEND, YOU DON'T HAVE AN ESTABLISHED COMMITMENT TO ONE ANOTHER.

FALSE. GIVING GENERAL ADVICE IS NOT THE SAME THING AS ASKING A SPECIFIC COUPLE IF I CAN HELP FACILITATE THEIR COMPLICATED EMOTIONS. I AM NOT INVOLVED WITH ANY OF YOU FUCKOS. THIS IS A STRICTLY PLATONIC ADVICE MEMO.

THANK YOU FOR YOUR CONTRIBUTION. AND ALSO BEING WILLING TO SHARE HOW THIS HAS HELPED YOU SPECIFICALLY. I AM GLAD IT HAS HELPED YOU AS MUCH AS IT HAS C:B

TAKE IT FROM KYLE, EVERYONE, WHO IS VASTLY SUPERIOR IN INTELLIGENCE THAN THE AVERAGE HUMANOID.

MAYBE NOT ALWAYS, BUT MOST PEOPLE DO KYLE. THERE IS A DEFINITIVE SEXUAL TENSION IN THE MAJORITY OF BLACK ROMANCES. THERE IS SOMETHING VERY CARNAL ABOUT HATING SOMEONE AND WANTING TO FIGHT THEM.

Edited 2021-11-03 03:51 (UTC)

I BARELY UNDERSTAND THE CONCEPT OF SIBLING, TO BE TOTALLY HONEST. THAT'S A VERY HUMAN NOTION.

I DID NOT REALIZE HUMANS COULD EVEN ADOPT EACH OTHER AS SIBLINGS. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT WORK?

BUT YEAH. SOMETIMES WE WIND UP CRUSHING ON PEOPLE WE WOULD BE BETTER OFF WITHOUT. IT HAPPENS.

A Teal Deer.
You do the math.

If I have to explain, that's just sad.

Edited 2021-11-03 03:59 (UTC)

(Karkat is practically the king of overshare-without-prompting. God knows how many of his memos existed throughout space and time. Here's another to add to the list.

And someone showing genuine interest in the matter? Oh, sign him the fuck up.)

BOTH. AS TROLLS, WE ARE NATURALLY INCLINED TOWARDS AN INTENSE RANGE OF PRIMARILY NEGATIVE EMOTIONS. OBVIOUSLY WE KNOW HOW TO ENJOY OURSELVES AND BE "HAPPY" BUT MOST OF OUR MOTIVATIONS AND CORE INSTINCTS ARE DRIVEN BY THE VIOLENCE OF OUR KIND.

OUR MAIN EMOTIONS TEND TO BE HATRED AND PITY. NATURALLY. BEING A MOIRAIL WITH SOMEONE USUALLY MEANS YOU PITY THEM ENOUGH TO WANT TO HELP PROTECT THEM AND TAKE CARE OF THEM AND MAKE THEM BETTER IN THIS WORLD. TO HUMANS, PITYING SEEMS TO BE A DEEPLY NEGATIVE EMOTION NO ONE WANTS AIMED AT THEM, BUT IN OUR WORLD, IT IS AS CLOSE TO COMPASSION AS YOU CAN GET.

WE ARE A NATURALLY AGGRESSIVE KIND WHO ARE VERY COMPETITIVE AND TEND TO WANT TO OVERTHROW OTHER PLANETS AND OTHER TROLLS. A RIVAL ENABLES YOU TO GAIN THE SKILLS AND STRENGTH IN ORDER TO DO THAT. HAVING SOMEONE WHO IS CONSTANTLY BETTERING YOU IS CRUCIAL TO LITERAL SURVIVAL. WE DON'T LIVE LONG WITHOUT GETTING TOUGH.

AS FOR LOVE, YOU CAN'T HELP BUT FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO IS CAPABLE OF SEEING YOU AT YOUR WEAKEST AND NOT TAKING ADVANTAGE OF THAT. YOU SHOULD BE ABLE TO BE VULNERABLE AROUND YOUR MATESPRIT AND IN OUR CULTURE, VULNERABILITY MIGHT AS WELL BE A DEATH SENTENCE TO MANY.

BIOLOGICALLY SPEAKING, OUR KIND ARE ONLY CAPABLE OF REPRODUCING BY COUPLING THROUGH A BLACK OR FLUSHED ROMANCE. I WON'T GET INTO THE GRITTY DETAILS, BUT THOSE COUPLINGS ARE THE ONLY ONES THAT CAN PRODUCE SUFFICIENT GENETIC MATERIAL THAT IS THEN CARRIED OFF TO THE MOTHER GRUB AND GIVEN TO MAKE THE NEXT GENERATION. IF YOU DON'T HAVE THAT KIND OF CONNECTION BY THE TIME THE DRONES SHOW UP FOR GATHERING, YOU'RE GOING TO BE KILLED.

SO BASICALLY IT'S EVERYTHING.

I'm going to be honest with you, your manner of formatting meant that my ability to read all of that text is quite limited.

If your species needs that long of an explanation to understand romance, I have quite the number of questions for you.

And, no, before you start, I'm not human.

CONSIDERING WE ALL HAVE HORNS, I WOULD SAY EXTREMELY HORNY. THAT WAS A JOKE. WELL, NOT FULLY, WE REALLY DO ALL HAVE HORNS.

ANYWAY, IT'S LESS THAT WE'RE EXTREMELY HORNY AND MORE THAT WE'RE REQUIRED TO PROVIDE OUR GENETIC MATERIAL OR ELSE WE JUST FUCKING DIE. WE LIVE IN A VERY INTENSE SOCIETY.

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