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text | carcinoGeneticist | apologies
HELLO FELLOW SLEEPERS. I WOULD LIKE TO PUBLICALLY OFFER MY SINCERE CONDOLENCES FOR THE TRICKSTER VIRUS I IMPLEMENTED LAST MONTH. A THEORY OF MINE GOT OUT OF HAND AND PEOPLE HAD TO SUFFER FOR IT WHICH IS 100% MY BAD. I AM SUPPOSED TO BE A GOOD LEADER AND INSTEAD, I FAILED YOU ALL. AS PER FUCKING USUAL.
(Karkat. Holy shit. No one thinks you're their leader. Again.)
PAST ME IS ARGUABLY THE MOST WORTHLESS, IDIOTIC TROLL TO HAVE EVER EXISTED IN ANY TIMELINE OR REALITY. TRULY, HE PROBABLY HUFFS CEILING CHIPS TO PUT TOGETHER BASIC SOLUTIONS. THAT GUY IS SUCH AN INSUFFERABLE PIECE OF SHIT SO I FULLY SUPPORT YOUR (PLATONIC) HATRED OF HIM. HE'S AN ASSHOLE.
TO BE HONEST, I WOULD SUPPORT YOUR HATRED OF CURRENT ME TOO. YOUR FEELINGS OF HATE ARE COMPLETELY APPROPRIATE GIVEN THE CIRCUMSTANCES OF ME ROYALLY FUCKING SHIT UP FOR SOME PEOPLE. AGAIN, MY BAD.
I WOULDN'T EVEN JUDGE YOU FOR HATING FUTURE ME EITHER.
...
ANYWAY. NOW I HAVE TO EXTRAPOLATE A VERY CRUCIAL POINT: IF YOU CLICK ON A LINK SOME RANDO SENT YOU ON THE INTERNET, YOU ARE A FUCKING MORON. YOU ARE THE DOWNFALL OF YOUR OWN SPECIES AND YOU SHOULD ABSOLUTELY FEEL LIKE THE BIGGEST IDIOT IN IDIOTSVILLE. CONGRATULATIONS, DICKBAG, I HAVE CRAFTED A DUNCE CROWN SPECIFICALLY FOR YOU. YOU ARE NOW THE MAYOR OF MORONS. DOES IT FEEL SPECIAL TO BE SO STUPID? DO YOU FEEL CONTENT IN YOUR ABYSMAL DEN OF DERELICT THINK FUNCTIONS?
I BET YOU DO, YOU GODDAMN PROTOZOIC ORGANISM. YOU HAVE OFFICIALLY BEEN MOTHERFUCKING PWNED BY THE MOST BASIC VIRUS SPREAD EVER AND IF YOU ARE EMBARRASSED, I WANT TO OFFER YOU A FIRM CLAP ON THE SHOULDER. YOU SHOULD FEEL EMBARRASSED.
BITCH.
(--Yeah, okay. Just ignore him. As he said, he gives you full permission to hate current and future him too. Starting now.)
(Karkat. Holy shit. No one thinks you're their leader. Again.)
PAST ME IS ARGUABLY THE MOST WORTHLESS, IDIOTIC TROLL TO HAVE EVER EXISTED IN ANY TIMELINE OR REALITY. TRULY, HE PROBABLY HUFFS CEILING CHIPS TO PUT TOGETHER BASIC SOLUTIONS. THAT GUY IS SUCH AN INSUFFERABLE PIECE OF SHIT SO I FULLY SUPPORT YOUR (PLATONIC) HATRED OF HIM. HE'S AN ASSHOLE.
TO BE HONEST, I WOULD SUPPORT YOUR HATRED OF CURRENT ME TOO. YOUR FEELINGS OF HATE ARE COMPLETELY APPROPRIATE GIVEN THE CIRCUMSTANCES OF ME ROYALLY FUCKING SHIT UP FOR SOME PEOPLE. AGAIN, MY BAD.
I WOULDN'T EVEN JUDGE YOU FOR HATING FUTURE ME EITHER.
...
ANYWAY. NOW I HAVE TO EXTRAPOLATE A VERY CRUCIAL POINT: IF YOU CLICK ON A LINK SOME RANDO SENT YOU ON THE INTERNET, YOU ARE A FUCKING MORON. YOU ARE THE DOWNFALL OF YOUR OWN SPECIES AND YOU SHOULD ABSOLUTELY FEEL LIKE THE BIGGEST IDIOT IN IDIOTSVILLE. CONGRATULATIONS, DICKBAG, I HAVE CRAFTED A DUNCE CROWN SPECIFICALLY FOR YOU. YOU ARE NOW THE MAYOR OF MORONS. DOES IT FEEL SPECIAL TO BE SO STUPID? DO YOU FEEL CONTENT IN YOUR ABYSMAL DEN OF DERELICT THINK FUNCTIONS?
I BET YOU DO, YOU GODDAMN PROTOZOIC ORGANISM. YOU HAVE OFFICIALLY BEEN MOTHERFUCKING PWNED BY THE MOST BASIC VIRUS SPREAD EVER AND IF YOU ARE EMBARRASSED, I WANT TO OFFER YOU A FIRM CLAP ON THE SHOULDER. YOU SHOULD FEEL EMBARRASSED.
BITCH.
(--Yeah, okay. Just ignore him. As he said, he gives you full permission to hate current and future him too. Starting now.)
no subject
trust me I've met worse
like yeah you're up there but shit so am I and I've found out that as shitty as we can get
there's always worse
pfff right
on the one hand yeah they didn't ask to get into that mess and it shouldn't have happened but on the other hand at some point especially if they're not that new anymore they have to at least have SOME idea right
although to be fair some of the newer guys probably don't even know what the fuck a telephone is let alone a computer
you could teach Internet safety classes
the most aggressive ones ever held
no thank you
this post was fucking hilarious
no subject
THAT'S MY RHETORIC! LIKE YES, I'M SORRY YOUR LEG WAS BLOWN OFF BY MY LANDMINE BUT YOU DID STEP INTO A FIELD YOU KNEW HAD A BUNCH OF LANDMINES IN IT SO LIKE WHO IS REALLY RESPONSIBLE HERE...FUCKING CHUMPS.
YEAH, I GUESS NOT. SUCH IS MY GODDAMN DESTINY I GUESS. ALWAYS HERDING IDIOTS INTO SAFETY. I DON'T KNOW WHY THE UNIVERSE CHOSE ME FOR THAT ROLE.
THANK YOU, TRASHMOUTH, I AM GLAD SOMEONE AROUND HERE HAS AN IOTA OF GOOD TASTE.
no subject
yeah like
if somebody stuck great big neon signs reading HEY FUCK OFF THERE ARE MINES HERE and you went in anyway like a dumbass that's a little bit on you
like if you didn't know how to read the signs yeah I'd be sympathetic but if you did know and you just charged in bc hey you've been through minefields before and it all turned out fine then
man
that's just fucking stupid
idk the universe (multiverse?) has a really fucked-up sense of humor
trust me I've been through like three universes by now and the one real constant in every single fucking one of them is that they have a sick twisted sense of humor and fucking love irony and drama
at some point you just end up going along with it bc why the fuck not
hopefully at least the next time shit hits the fan it'll do it in a funny way and not get shit splattered all over you
you're welcome