deernet | Video UN: glyphywitchy [Back dated to May 12]

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Video UN: glyphywitchy [Back dated to May 12]

[It's been a few days since dying, and Luz had unfortunately kept this to herself. If you haven't been able to tell, this girl has been having a pretty rough month, and it didn't seem to be getting better. She lurched her device to focus, and, though coughing, was looking directly into the camera].

So. Uh. Died. First time, ha ha, not a fun experience. Kinda looking for some company, here or just on this thing otherwise. I should probably be getting rest, yes, but staring up at the ceiling regretting stuff and hating yourself can only keep out the quiet for so long.

Also, been out of the loop a bit. Someone update me on things?

[Action]
sickandstressed1

Luz was pretty sure that she was going to get an earful from people in the house, but ESPECIALLY from Ahiru, who had very much not wanted her to go on the mission. Luz had thought she could handle it and had handled somewhat similar situations before. Now, though, since they'd talked about it before, Luz knew it looked even WORSE.

Add the whole mix of self-loathing for being too weak to avoid death and the ever-present gloom of missing Fern and Varian, and Luz was pretty much a powder keg of emotions and blah. She was in her room right now, dimly lit with her purple lights and surrounded by a fort of stuffed animals and, well, Luz was a sight to see.

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That would be great. The getting more used to this thing and the more friends thing both. I feel kind of like that kids' storybook, though, would you be my mommy? Only for mommy, replace it with friend?

[she likely would never have to. she's heard that there are magic mushrooms, but they're not addictive and can't be overdosed on.

it was almost intimidating to Lexi, that so many people were living their lives without the fear of judgement. she was in high school, everything carried judgement with it]

Thank you, that's sweet of you.

So am I. That's what I'm hoping to bring here.

It takes time, sometimes for lots of different reasons. I get you, I get you! But it'll get easier, trust me. It helps that we're all displaced in one way or another, so we're all starting from a place not exactly normal.

[Granted, everyone who'd lived through Deerington had their own perspective there, and would find things a little more familiar than they would like.

Luz had hallucinated on the mushrooms one month due to shenanigans. They certainly did not FEEL magical to her]!

We could all use that, no worries! I'm sure you'll find your place soon!

It's a good idea. We all could use a place like that.

Yeah. My sister was always the outgoing and pretty one, not me. I just kind of faded into the background most of the time. But you're right, none of us are on even footing, so that's something to bond over.

[she sometimes wonders if there will ever be as strong of a bond between people who came in Deerington first. she's heard stories about what it was like and what people went through, and it sounded awful.

Lexi was being busy at the site for her new bookstore and apparently someone thought it would be funny to somehow summon busy bees. she had a nightmare of a time getting them all out]

Yeah. I mean, I like what I'm doing? Mostly studying and getting things ready and taking lessons from Sasuke. So those are good starts.

Thanks! It broke my heart when I showed up and there was no bookstore. I'm definitely a fan of browsing the shelves and seeing what seems interesting. Clicking along on Amazon isn't the same.

That stinks. I don't know so much what that's like, since I'm an only child, but I do know what it feels like to not feel like you're living up to expectations. At least here, you can attempt to live how you'd want to, and figure out if those expectations are worth making yourself frustrated over.

[It was pretty bad. Luz knew that the bonds with those from Deerington came with the price of having lived through some pretty bad stuff though. In some ways, it was probably better to have only Trench under your belt along with whatever world you lived in before.

Oh, that needed to come up in conversation. Luz had missed some things that month]!

Good to know! Is Sasuke a good teacher?

Ugh, totally agree. Some of my best memories were browsing bookstores with mami. It's harder to find bookstores like that that are not niche.

It's a pretty rough feeling, isn't it? And I don't think those frustrations are really worth it. Cassie has her thing and so should I. I just need to figure out what that is.

[that could be. Trench was weird enough as it was to Lexi. she's constantly trying to figure out what she did or didn't do to get this or that result from one of the Pthumerians' antics. as it was, she didn't think she deserved the Pit of Negative One Million self-esteem when it was the Moss King's turn.

she tried to humanely trap them! all of them! but she wasn't about to let them build a hive in the store broom closet]

Yeah, really good, really understanding. I said I didn't feel ready for the big tournament and he didn't, like, try to guilt trip me. He was very understanding about it. At the same time, I know I'm getting better.

Definitely. I want my store to have a good mix of genres, fiction, and non-fiction. Something anyone can find a book in. Though, if it's okay? What's your mami like?

It is, especially when most of the kids in your school seem to be unimpressed by you.

[That was putting it mildly, but Luz didn't want to give her new friend a bad impression of her without them meeting first.

Right, that whole thing with the Moss King. Luz could see why Fern was not a fan.

Not the bees]!

Sasuke doesn't seem like the type to get all bent out of shape about a tournament. He's more about the actual teaching, which I respect. If I didn't have my history with Ozpin, I'd have considered Sasuke as a teacher. I'm glad you're taking his instruction.

[Luz was pretty sure she'd get better in no time]!

I think you'll find it!

Oh, well. I haven't seen her in a few years because of this place, but...nice. She's someone who works really hard, and she's been my rock for years, if I'm honest. No one could cheer me up like her.

I really do miss her.

[ruefully] Yeahhh...been there, experienced that. But, you too?

[which seemed ridiculous, Luz seemed friendly and outgoing and cute, why would people not like her?

count Lexi among them. she really felt like that whole thing was a giant pain in the ass.

loads of bees! and her not knowing where the hell they came from]

He's not, not at all. And that's definitely it. He seems to know what our possible strengths and weaknesses are, I'm 5'4" and not going to get any taller. So I'm mostly learning about how to turn an opponents momentum against them and use my height as a strength more than a weakness.

[she hoped so! she could already tell she was better than she was when she started]

...wow. That's--it's got to suck. Being away from her for so long. Is there any way she could come back? Does that happen much?

I'm sorry.

Oh yeah. At least you made a friend there. I didn't have friends until I actually left that realm! Kinda sad, right? But I tried too hard and wound up alienating people. Maybe I needed to tone it down.

[Luz unfortunately still carried some of that blame on herself. It wasn't like she could go back and see for sure if it was her fault and not just her own insecurities.

Luz was happy to skip the bees though. No bees, thanks].

Sounds like he knows what he's talking about! I'm sure you're going to do really well if you follow his instructions! Besides, its not a race anyway: the whole reason for going to a teacher is to learn discipline and inner strength so you become a stronger person!

[That's what seemed to be the impression, anyway].

Not that I've seen, and it's been close to two years. I kind of...don't like to think about it too much. It can hurt.

[Her mom. Eda. Margot and many, many others. Luz tried not to look too pained about it, though clearly a little of her feeling there was leaking out].

Sometimes, but it's pretty rare.

[Lexi looks on the shocked side] What, you? You think you're the problem? No. No way. I mean, I just met you and we're already talking like we've been friends forever. At least I think so?

[and Lexi blames herself for not being more open. but it was hard when she had a beautiful older sister (who would put out) who took up all of the air in the room]

Yeah, I'm sure he's forgotten more about martial arts than I'll ever be able to learn in a lifetime. And, I do. And, you're right. I tend to be kinda hard on myself? [and she laughs in an attempt to defuse that statement]

...wow. Yeah. [a pause] Hey, look, if you need someone to talk any of this over with, gimme a call. Or a text? Or a video? I promise it's okay.

[yeah, one thing about being the quiet one? the observer? Lexi tended to be good at reading people. not so good when it came to actual actions, but step one had to be done before step two]

Oh. That sucks. [understatement. damnit, Lexi, be better at personing!]

Maybe I try too hard? The more I did, the more I seemed to freak people out. It's funny, but I was able to make friends more easily when I left the Earth dimension. Not really sure what that says about me. You seem pretty nice yourself though! I'm sure you had your own share of friends!

[Luz would always wonder if she just came across as too spirited, or too hyper. It was hard to think about, since Earth felt like such a long time ago].

Just stick with him, and I'm sure you'll be OK. Don't worry, just take in the lessons, and I'm sure you'll be as strong as anyone in the Dojo!

Oh, sure! I mean, thanks for listening! Didn't mean to dump some of that on you, but saying goodbye never gets easier, you know?

Yeah, it does. The good thing is that I can always make new friends though. Sometimes when I least expect it.

[Hint hint].

No, I mean, I just have to wonder about the taste of people in your home world. But at least you found somewhere you could make friends. [and she flushes] Actually...no. My best friend, she's kind of been drifting away and paying more attention to her girlfriend than anyone else. Which, fair. And all of the other girls I know are my big sister's friends. So I'm kind of...not good at making friends, too. But my problem might be that I don't try hard enough.

[no way, just the right amount of spirited and enthusiastic]

Thank you. Really. I...I appreciate the faith in me. And him. And our lessons.

Hey, no, it's fine. I mean, I'm still here, right? If I minded the, you know, that I would have made some lame excuse and cut off the link.

[warmly] Yeah. This place is good for that.

[hint received! mostly!]

People in my world were...not as dorky as me, I think, and they were put off by my enthusiasm. It's not for everyone!

Oh, that's a shame. You should never let an S.O. make you forget about your friend, especially if they're like you. Well, her loss. I would say that a lot of people might think that about themselves, when in reality they just need a change of scenery to meet like minded people!

[Or not like minded people who were still really fun anyway! It was clearly working out for Luz]!

As someone who's trying to get stronger, I can tell you that it'll be hard at first, but you'll get there. You just have to trust in your conviction.

Heh, yeah, that's true! I'm just trying not to bring people down. It doesn't change how I feel about it, but sometimes you need to vent. Thank you for NOT cutting the link!

It sure is! You know, it's actually really easy to talk to you. I don't know what people in your town are thinking. You're really great!

Well, I like it? If that helps? It's way more fun than pretending to be all jaded about everything.

I guess. I mean it, though, her girlfriend is really sweet. And, I suppose this is my change in scenery? So far, I like it--if only because I can my own house with my own room!

[no more sharing with Cassie, even if she did show up]

I...think I can do that? I've always kind of been someone who sat off to the sidelines and watched everything happen. Hence the username? But I'm trying to be better.

[warmly] Sure, it was the least I could do. I mean, I figure it had to have been traumatizing enough and since we don't have any actual psychologists to help with PTSD, we've got to do our best ourselves.

And I feel the same way about you. And you're really great, too! [she says enthusiastically]

Oh, ok! Thanks!

[Luz couldn't help feeling a little happy about that, since a part of her was always afraid of driving people off with her energy].

I'm sure she is, but still. You should never lose contact with your friends because of that. But you're here now, so I'm not going to be too broken up about it! And yeah, having your own place is actually pretty great!

Oh! Well I'm the opposite, so maybe we can borrow a little from each other there. I mean, I DID just die. Might be a good a sign as any to reel it back a bit.

We could use some here, that's for sure. We have PTSD a plenty. I try not to overwhelm people when I first meet them though!

Hey, would you maybe want to come over sometime? It's a bit of a crazy house, but I do have snacks and movies, and I am technically under strong orders to stay put for a little while. Also, my room is GREAT.

Sure, it's my pleasure.

[it's actually a rather nice change of pace. Maddy back home had a lot of energy, but it was usually angry energy. Luz's is far better]

Yeah. I'm doing my best to try and get settled in. It sort of serves a kick in the shorts when I see so many people younger than us doing just fine, you know? And I love having my own place. I can have miso ramen every day for dinner if that's what I want.

I think that would work. But...even despite. Everything. You shouldn't have to feel like you have to pull back. Take a break from everything for a while, sure, but not full scale pulling back.

And if I was overwhelmed, it was because of the death thing. Not the overwhelming. That part was fine.

I'd love to! That sounds like a lot of fun! Thank you! [Lexi always sounds at least a little amazed when people like her]

[Luz is beaming! It had been a little bit since she felt this hyped]!

Oh sure, I get that. It can be pretty rough, to start almost fresh in a new place! I mean, don't get me wrong, I'd totally like it if you didn't just eat the same food, but that aside, having your own place is pretty nice!

I am. Going to try to take it easy at home, catch up on small things, and one of those things will be looking up the bookshop!

The death thing is...not easy. Still recovering from that. Maybe the time at home will
remind me not to get too reckless.

Great! My home's in Cassandra, you'll see it by the big tower! I have the attic all to myself!

[same here! she'd never fallen into conversation so easily with anyone from home]

Yeah. And I'm just sixteen, so in theory there were two more years before I was off to college. A college far, far away from East Highland. I'm thinking Harvard far away. And it's great. I'm already used to doing the cleaning and laundry, so doing it here's no big deal.

[she grins] Good. I'm glad to hear that. All of it.

Or at least reckless within reason. Which might be an oxymoron, I'm not entirely sure? But, yeah, loads of time to recover.

Nice. I'll have to come over sometime soon? I'll bring baked goods. Of some kind. I still can't find a canister of baking powder.

[It was one of those good things in Trench, finding someone who you just clicked with right away! It at least helped to fill some of the hole left by Gus and Willow, who were fond memories Luz would always have of the first true friends she ever made].

Sixteen too, huh? You know, I wonder what I would be doing at that point, if I was still on Earth then. Maybe I'd be prepping for that too, if I didn't decide to stay and help Mami. But I wound up in the Boiling isles, and then Deerington. So. There's that whole thing.

I'm sure my housemates will be too!

Actually, for me that's pretty appropriate. And yes, recover! Key word!

Oh, do! And don't worry about baked good, just bring yourself! I'll prep us with some goods, depending on what we're doing!

I'll lend you a can if you still can't find one! Trust me, learning to cook for yourself and other people? Pretty important!

[it was much easier to find and make friends in Trench. Lexi honestly couldn't remember ever having as many friends as she did here]

Yeah, sure am! [and Lexi winces slightly] Well...I've heard that time kind of stops in our worlds? At least that's a rumor. So maybe you can go back and start making college plans then?

Probably. That's the good and bad thing about having a roommate, there's someone to go home to. And on the flip side, someone to worry about when they aren't home.

R&R! Which according to old pamphlets I've seen in what used to be home ec, going somewhere to ski. Or going somewhere to surf. None of them ever recommended curling up with a good book and a hedgehog.

Oh. Really? [a pause] Sure! And I figure maybe a movie night? Or I bring over some of my personal stash of graphic novels to share?

Yeah, I kind of had to do most of the cooking back home. Mom could manage salads, but that was about it.

[Same here, though Luz started learning that lesson in the Boiling Isles first before she came to Deerington and then Trench, but she understood by now that there were places for people like them. It was comforting].

I don't know if we go back to our worlds when we leave. It's said that we go back to being the squids, traversing the oceans of our life out there, in the vastness of Trench's oceans.

[She wasn't sure how much that was true, but it was food for thought].

Besides, I just started high school back then. It would be really weird to try and think about it now, when I've missed at least two years of school now!

I have that, but with the people I live with now. Most of them are about my age.

[And she worried about them, with everything that happened in Trench].

See, that's supposed to be the hobby, apparently not something highlighted as relaxing! Can you believe that? Hedgehog?

[Surprising, but also incredibly cute]!

Yeah, of course! I'd be hosting, after all! Besides, it gives me chance to cook for you, so why not? And yes, graphic novels! Movies! All the fun stuff!

Just salads? Isn't that pretty bare bones? Not that I'm passing judgement or anything!

[Luz's mom, on the other hand, likely VERY much would].

[Lexi would love to hear about where Luz had been previously. the idea of going to not just one world which wasn't her own but two was fascinating]

Ack. No. No way do I want to be a squid forever. It's kind of horrifying.

[nope nope nope, she needed to go home, not be trapped as a squid forever]

Oh, no! That's awful! This place seriously needs a school, like an actual school with grades along with the School of Mutter. That way, people like us could keep current with our grades. You should be a Junior by now!

Yeah? Then they should be in high school, too. Even it's like the one piece of normalcy with all of the chaos.

[she still wondered what those who had been in the dream had endured, but was too nervous to ask]

Exactly! When I think of rest, I don't think of going face first into the snow or the ocean because I'm a klutz. And he's not just any hedgehog, he's my Omen. His name is Orville.

[and at that, Orville makes his way into view, giving a hedgehog smile]

I'd love that. I'm...my schedule is pretty much wide open, so whenever's best for you! And yes. They have Rifftrax Live recordings on the Omni, "Birdemic" has to be seen to be believed if you haven't already watched it.

Yeah, well, when dad was here, he did most of the cooking. And that's not an option anymore, so I kind of stepped in.

[Suze Howard was almost never without a bottle of wine nearby]

[Luz barely understood how she managed it. The Boiling Isles had been one thing, but Deerington had been its own unique barrel of weirdness that Luz had yet to actually fully conceptualize. She was sure that Lexi would have to actually go through someone's mindscape to get an idea of how strange and twisted it really was].

I try not to think about it myself. Too horrifying to think about.

Totally true, but for that I would have had to go to school the whole time, and let's just say there wasn't really a reason for me to do that. I was pretty occupied with a lot of the other things happening.

Um. Yes, ok! I'll go with that and agree with you!

[How to explain that one of her housemates was an actual fishboy and the other was a duck who both had human guises. And then there was Zib, who was technically a human with alien technology on his back fused to him. Where did THAT all fit?

Trust that Luz would have pointedly told her, "You don't wanna know."]

Heh, that sounds like something I would do! Those activities are fun, but I don't know if I'd call them relaxing? Aww! Orville is so adorable!

[Is Luz contemplating picking up an omen and cuddling it? Just a little bit].

OOh! I've never seen that! We'll have to do that together then! Sounds fun!

Right, makes sense. Kind of. Well, its a little unfair, but who am I to judge?

[she'd be so embarrassed going through someone else's mindscape. and so apologetic as soon as she got out. "I'm not even supposed to be able to do that!," etc.]

Yeah. Okay. Totally deleting that idea from my brain. Or at least my conscious brain, I'm sure my subconsciousness will spring some kind of crazy on me when I least expect it.

It's hard for me to imagine being so busy that school wouldn't be in there as. A thing. Like an "I'm supposed to be in Statistics right now, why is this happening?" Which is an actual thought I've had. I don't even like Statistics.

[at this point, she'd take most of it in stride. the only thing which might weird her out is the alien tech.

she trusts Luz]

Yeah, relaxing is being on the beach with a big umbrella for shade and a steady supply of La Croix. And a stack of books. And he is! [to Orville] Say hi to Luz, Orville! We've just met, but she's really cool. [and Orville gives another hedgehog smile and peeps out hi, Luz!] Isn't that amazing? He just started talking on his own.

[hedgehogs are effing adorable. and Orville would probably allow it as long as Lexi was in eyeshot]

It will be! I swear, that movie has the worst special effects of anything I've ever seen. Even 1950s horror movies have better special effects! And there aren't any characters, it's like Standard White Guy #1 and Standard White Woman #2 and of course they're a couple.

Yeah. Lucky for me, no one has any food allergies. [a pause] Well, other than Cassie refusing to eat gluten 'cause she's convinced it's the devil.

[It had definitely been intrusive when it happened, but Luz wouldn't hold it against anyone who was still trying to figure out everything. Besides, there were also going to be those times where you just couldn't help it].

Just concentrate on the good stuff! There are a lot of good things to being here and not elsewhere!

[To be honest, after the Boiling Isles Luz could barely consider anything too strange anymore].

La Croix? You like that stuff? Tastes like overpriced seltzer water to me. I'll happily take the books though, maybe some coconut water too! Oh, and the shade sounds great!

He talked to me! Aww!

[Now Luz is beside herself in cute and is definitely being gentle and adoring with her pets! It was still a hedgehog after all].

My omen doesn't even talk, but boy do her stares say a thousand things. She's just sleeping for now though.

Oof, that does sound bad. Now I want to watch and make fun of it with you even more!

Hmfph! Glutens not too bad for me! I am lactose intolerant though.

[maybe, but Lexi would still be mortified. even if it was a city-wide thing that no one could avoid, she'd be like "jajf;a;alkjlsf, noooooooooo!"

warmly] Yeah, there are. Honestly? I...kinda like it here. The people are so much easier to like than the ones back home.

[that's good, at least. that coming to a place like this wasn't that strange. she's trying to look at herself as a character in a shoujo manga, given the fact that everyone's attractive]

It's like the only non-alcoholic stuff mom drinks, so we always have a twelve-pack in the fridge. I either had to develop a taste for it or use what little money I have to buy Dr. Pepper Cream Soda. But I've never had coconut water, does it taste like coconuts? And shade is a very good thing.

He likes you! Don't you, Orville. [and he says yes, I like it when you talk to Luz!" cue blushing from Lexi]

[usually when Lexi was out and about, Orville would ride on her shoulder, her usually holding a hand up to make sure he kept steady]

Is it like a mom glare? Nothing's scarier than a mom glare. I don't know about you, but I find myself apologizing for everything from the Lincoln assassination up.

Yes! Yes! It's going to be so much fun!

Glad you mentioned that. Does this place have oat milk and is that one okay for you?

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(CW: underage alluded to)

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