un: timaeusTestified | text | Birthday Boy

[givehead]

Turning 21 has been a completely underrated experience. I was expecting the blackout and loss of time. Even the warping to a new place isn't out of the realm of estimated probability.

But being genetically altered is a plot twist. I assume it is so we can fuck the monsters.

I call dibs on the raven dude.

cw: looots of kink/fetish/nsfw jokes/conversation going on in this here post.

Comments

Voice; UN: Cuddlebunny

[lightthedarkness]

[Du du du, just reading what other people have to say~

Oh! It's Savage.

Wait. Why is SAVAGE of all people here?

Well, now she's curious as hell! And oooooh ho ho ho ho! This conversation did NOT disappoint!]

OH MY GOSH! SAVAGE! YOU SHOULD TOTALLY GO ON A DATE WITH DIRK-SAN!

:') voice

[givehead]

Yeah, Savage, go on a date with Dirk-san.

[lightthedarkness]

I mean, between him and his brother, Maul, who... I don't see around yet but YOU will see him around, to be sure. Between Savage and Maul, Savage is nicer and calmer.

[She's got BOTH brothers pinned.] I mean, don't get me wrong, both of them have serious rage problems. [And codependency problems.] BUT Savage is more likely to leave you unconscious, Maul is... mnn... WAS more likely to kill... Thooough, he may maim now more depending on what caused him to do it in the first place.

Anyway! Stubborn as HELL though, just absolutely fair warning.

Voice;

[opress]

[At this very moment, Savage actually wished she was still so very angry with him and wasn't speaking to him. Why did this have to be public? Also made worse by Dirk replying to her too.

He snorted like an enraged bull.]

Why are you yelling? About dating? I don't date.

[He'll eat those words someday.]

Voice;

[lightthedarkness]

You don't date yet because [See codependency issues] you just never found the right person! Dirk-san seems genuinely enthusiastic about the whole thing!

And don't try to be like "Oh, but I'm not enthusiastic." [She tried her best imitation at his voice, it was terrible.] Because you're never enthusiastic about ANYTHING anyway.

Maybe you'll like it!

Voice;

[opress]

There is no right person. And enthusiasm had nothing to do with being chosen as a mate or... dating.

[Her imitation had him growling very loudly. How had his brother not killed her in her sleep? Or while she ate? Or well... at any time!] You don't know me well enough to judge enthusiasm. [No, she was right but cue stubbornness.]

I won't like it. I hate everything. [Except Maul. Ruin, his tentacle beast rathtar. Maybe certain types of meat. Well, never mind. Blanket statements only.]

Voice;

[lightthedarkness]

Sure there is! For some, it's right people. [But he didn't strike her as the polyamorous sort.] And enthusiasm has EVERYTHING to do with dating! I didn't SAY mate I said date. Get your hearing checked, Savvy.

[And there it is, the nickname. Also, she's more powerful than your brother by leaps and bounds and more importantly, he loves her.] I absolutely know you well enough for that.

[She rolls her eyes.] It's ONE date. Come on, it could be fun!

Voice;

[opress]

Hence why I don't date. [It wasn't a concept he was allowed or introduced to until he had left his planet. He wasn't supposed to be allowed those things.] If you're so enthusiastic about dating, you date Dirk-san.

[He hated that nickname so much. It reminded him of a few too painful moments that ended in the usual tragedy. But everything was happening, so he didn't yell about that this time.] No you don't. This is our... fourth conversation.

[He growled.] I hate fun. [Stubborn.]

Voice;

[lightthedarkness]

No, you DIDN'T date, there is absolutely nothing stopping you now. Literally nothing, and don't try to pull the Maul card because we both know he'd agree with me that you absolutely can date. [Oh honey, that's not how preferences work, Dirk is as gay as Usagi is Lunarian.

If she knew WHY he hated the nickname, she would actually probably change it. Buuuut she doesn't, so.] And for you? That's like lifelong friendship.

Fine, then this will be suffering, which means you should do it even more since you're apparently into that.

Voice;

[opress]

Don't take my brother's side. Have you two been conspiring? [When he couldn't defend himself when it came to the dating option, he'd do as Maul did and shift topics entirely! Savage just assumed everyone was bisexual or pansexual.

Savage made a hissing sound like an angry cat. What a burn, Usagi.] I don't have friends. [Take that as a rebuttal.]

I will make him suffer when I kick him in the throat. Then everyone involved will suffer.

Voice;

[lightthedarkness]

...........................

SOOOOOOO what I'm hearing is you WILL go on a date, since you just said you want him to suffer too.

Voice; un: darkness

[survivalthroughhate]

[Maul has been following this whole thing, enjoying himself immensely, and feels now is a good time to butt in.]

I agree. I've been trying to find someone for his potential mate here and having no success. This seems very promising.

[Oh no, Savage. Your brother and his wife are teaming up to get you on a date. Be afraid. Be very afraid.

Then as an aside to Dirk:]

But first I need to make sure you are worthy of my brother.

[As any good overprotective older brother should be doing when setting up their younger sibling on a date.]

Voice; Not here

[lightthedarkness]

[NONE of the boys can see it but, Usagi is ABSOLUTELY pumping a fist in victory when Maul joins in. They all might hear the softly whispered "Yes!" though.]

Re: Voice; un: darkness

[givehead]

(God, this is one of the most hilarious things that has ever happened to him in his life.

He somehow manages to speak without a trace of amusement in his voice though, much to his credit:)

Sure. I get that. What do you constitute as worthy?

[survivalthroughhate]

[Alright, time to get down to business and see if this guy was a potential weirdo or not.]

Well, first off, I have to make sure he's not going to snap you in two either mentally or physically. From what I have seen, mentally you will be alright, but can you keep up with him in other ways?

cw: decapitation and kinda necrophilia

[givehead]

He can snap me in two, but I'll be fine. My first kiss with a dude was after I cut my own head off and he made out with it. I got better.

(Obviously.

He's definitely a weirdo.)

[survivalthroughhate]

Ah. You're some form of creature that cannot get easily hurt? Good.

[One can almost see Maul mentally taking notes.]

How do you feel about relationships with someone on the Dark Side of the Force? Would you consider yourself to be more on the light or dark side of things? And have you ever murdered anyone in cold blood?

[givehead]

(Dirk snorts quietly.)

The Dark Side or the Light Side? Like, good or evil? I think those are arbitrary words and that morality is more complex.

(....)

My title is Prince of Heart which translates to Destroyer of Souls. I think you can probably parse out my track record from that.

[survivalthroughhate]

No. Not good and evil. [Maul says firmly.] Think of the Dark and the Light as being more like a way of balance. Passion versus detachment. Thinking of your own desires versus being more selfless towards others. Things like that.

[Maul takes that in and he definitely sounds approving as he says:]

Good, at least there will be no issues regarding morality between the two of you. So what would you plan if you were going to take him on a date? You'll have to take the initiative there because all he'd likely do would be to have you come over and introduce you to his pet rathtar.

[Savage's skills of imagination weren't always the greatest, even Maul could admit that.]

Voice; Private

[opress]

What are you doing here? You can't possibly agree with this!

[Savage sounded positively aggrieved to have his brother here too. How did a simple question about animal fetishes turn into setting him up on a date?]

[survivalthroughhate]

You need a mate. That much is certain. Ventress is not here and so you are free once more to pursue someone that will make you happy. And since you have not done so on your own account, I will have to step in and make sure it happens for you.

[As any loving, caring older brother would do when they were devoted to their younger sibling and as completely codependent as the two Zabrak brothers were.]

[opress]

Why is this becoming important to you? I am happy when I'm elevating your position, being your enforcer. [You know, younger Sith Apprentice brother stuff.]

What makes you so certain about this one?

[survivalthroughhate]

But you deserve to find someone who will also make you happy and you can do the same for you in return. I have found one and it was one of the best things that happened for me in Deerington. Besides, wouldn't you like to grow old with another person and have a large amount of kits?

[Maul feels his brother would definitely make a good father, much more so than Maul himself would ever be as one.]

Well, the fact he's shown any interest in you is a good start for one.

[That was the biggest first step when it came to finding someone for Savage, so they were already off to a good start!]

[opress]

I don't care about being happy, and you know that. I care about my kin, and you're my kin. [He was clinging to codependency like a defense.] What does it matter? I'm already dead technically, and humans males don't have kits if I remember correctly.

[Cue a moment of snotty younger brother showing up.]

He also showed interest in the Pthumarian too...

[survivalthroughhate]

I care about you being happy. [Maul says with a scowl. The stubborn nature they both have in common can be an advantage much of the time but right now he just wants to smack his brother.] And I am going to see you find some here in Trench since we are going to be living here for the foreseeable future. [Possibly the rest of their lives given Maul has no desire to go back to their galaxy since Savage will still be dead there. He pauses, thinking of what Dirk told him about being decapitated and somehow still alive.] .....Considering what this somewhat humanoid being has told me, I wouldn't discount the ability to possibly have kits with him.

[Maul smirks.]

So there is no accounting for taste. But you cannot afford to be discerning in who shows interest in you. If you do not at least attempt to go on one date with him, you'll leave me no choice but to publicly announce on the network that I am looking for a mate for you.