text || un: wheeler

[micycle]

PIZZA MARKET RESEARCH SURVEY #1

1. What are the best pizza toppings (and nothing weird like anchovies)?

2. Thin crust or thick crust?

3. Do you like orange soda?

4. Do you know how replicate orange soda here?

5. What are your preferred pizza eating hours?

6. How often would you use a horse-based delivery service? Would it depend on what kind of horse showed up at your house with the pizza? Would it matter if the horse was fucking terrifying?

Thank you all for your input.

Comments

un: Pierrot | text

[violetlies]

1. Cheese. Pepperoni. Mushrooms. Pineapple. Tomatoes. One of those is a lie.

2. Depends on the day, the time, and the cycle of the moon but usually thick and extra good if it's filled

3. It's okay. Grape is better. If you get grape soda I'll actually cry

4. Bruh if I knew I'd already have an enterprise

5. Anytime anywhere all answers are acceptable

6. Very frequently. Please send your most fucking terrifying horse. I love all horses but I like the implications behind that and I think it would be very cash money of you.

Thank you for this survey. Please let me know about the nightmare horse and potential soda along with the pizza.

[micycle]

Okay all but two of those are gross but pineapple had better be the lie because it is not getting near my pizza.

I can make you all the grape soda you want if I can figure out how to make soda and also how to make it taste like that because no way is that actual grapes.

And lastly there's only one terrifying horse but he's absolute nightmare fuel so you're in luck. I'll make sure he emerges from a shadow right when your back is turned.

text; @skywalker

[facultative]

[This is going to be useless answers because he fails from the get go.]

1. I don't know what pizza is.
2. Food is food.
3. It's alright.
4. No.
5. There's no such thing as a specific hour to eat something.
6. Every now and then. No. No.

[micycle]

Okay first of all it’s this big round bread with sauce.

And second of all there are absolutely right times to eat things. Like you don’t have eggs at four in the afternoon.

text; un: shiro

[shiro2hero]

1. What are the best pizza toppings (and nothing weird like anchovies)?
I'll take anything. Really. Even pineapple.

2. Thin crust or thick crust?
Thick, definitely.

3. Do you like orange soda?
It's all right?

4. Do you know how replicate orange soda here?
Sorry, no. You don't want me near the kitchen anyway.

5. What are your preferred pizza eating hours?
Evening? Late night. But I'll take cold morning pizza too.

6. How often would you use a horse-based delivery service? Would it depend on what kind of horse showed up at your house with the pizza? Would it matter if the horse was fucking terrifying?


... Mike, is this about Marshmallow.

[micycle]

Will said he could be our delivery guy and I’m all for it but I’m kind of afraid people won’t want the pizza if it comes with a demon horse.

text; un: liontamer

[chickenchoicejudy]

1. cheese (ACTUAL PIZZA CHEESE I found some place doing like goat cheese flatbread and it's NOT the same), pepperoni, absolutely NO mushrooms. those are the best go-to basics but I'll totally check out weird specialty pizzas just to try them. pineapple's pretty good once in a while too.

2. thin crust!! fold it up like new york style pizza. buuuut i wouldn't turn down thick crust in a pinch. all pizza is good pizza we don't pizza discriminate in this house

3. YES dude I haven't had orange crush in FOREEEEVER

4. no idea man but now I'm gonna be thinking about orange soda for the rest of my life

5. all hours are pizza hours - more seriously the whole magic blood thing made me nocturnal so. nightime?

6. dude as long as the horse isn't going to eat me, my boyfriend, or the pizza, you can send literally the scariest, most metal horse you have I will HAPPILY take pizza that looks like its being delivered by a metal album cover

[micycle]

Why would you fold it? That would just make it harder to bite.

And he hasn’t eaten my boyfriend. Mostly he eats junk food.

Text; UN: Cuddlebunny

[lightthedarkness]

1. All toppings are good toppings, except carrots and durians.

2. Thick crust! Then you can dip it, too!

3. It's okay! But I prefer strawberry flavored!

4. No clue.

5. Any time after 11:00 AM is fine. (I have heard some people will have it for breakfast, though?)

6. So long as the pizza is in one piece, doesn't matter who's delivering it.

[micycle]

What the fuck is a durian?

text; un: clearthestreet

[laruetheday]

1. goat cheese and peas

2. no crust, just a lettuce wrap

3. not as much as dr. pepper

4. i'm not giving away any recipes for free, punk

5. 8 am

6. no horses. i want all pizza delivered by hand by a skinny guy with awful hair.

1/2

[micycle]

un: AMMAKO (handwritten)

[brushy]

[ based on all the other answers her omen is reading to her, this is about food. there is only one answer. ]

Yes.

[micycle]

Yes to which? And how did you write it like that??

Text; UN: SweetDee

[agiantbird]

1. Pepperoni, mushrooms, and rum ham. You're probably going to get weirdos ordering shit like pineapple and anchovies, so my advice is to mix wasabi or chili powder in with the pizza sauce, and smother it ALL over the pizza base. Sure, you'll lose a customer or two, but you don't want anchovy or pineapple people stinking up your business, do you?

2. Thin crust. Sometimes the thick crust is just a bit too much, and I end up leaving it behind, and it's just a waste, you know?

3. It's not bad. It's a decent mixer!

4. Not sure. I think you can get the flavor by boiling an orange and some sugar, or something? You should try that.

5. Evenings. Sometimes I'll eat leftovers for breakfast.

6. Why?

Re: Text; UN: SweetDee

[micycle]

Okay but what the fuck is a wasabi? Is that like a vegetable?

And obviously it’s because a fucking terrifying demon horse is going to be delivering it. Duh.

Text; UN: BlackMoths

[blackmothwings]

1. I don't eat pizza, but if I did, I suppose I would enjoy bell peppers, mushrooms, tomatoes, and olives.

2. Again, I don't eat pizza, so I'm not entirely sure. Both, perhaps?

3. I do not.

4. I'm afraid not. Are you going to try? If so, I wish you all the best.

5. It seems like something best enjoyed during the evening, doesn't it? But it would be nice to eat at lunchtime too. I feel the only unacceptable time to eat pizza is in the morning.

6. I grew up during a time when horses were the only means of transport. So it is acceptable to me, yes. Would this 'terrifying' horse happen to be named Marshmallow?

[micycle]

Yeah Will said he’d love to help, and probably wouldn’t eat the pizzas on the way.

And people eat it in the morning all the time! Usually after sleepovers when it’s all cold.

text | un: alcaid

[ghostharasser]

1. Pepperoni, sausage, bacon, any kind of pepper. Pineapple is good if it's paired right? I know you said no weird stuff but I would do unfathomable black magic for a mac and cheese pizza.

2. Thick, definitely

3. Yes.

4. No, but I bet figuring out a soda stream wouldn't be TOO hard. My uncle could probably work it out. I'll ask him and get back to you.

5. Literally any time is pizza time.

6. Would it go all the way out to Gaze? If so, yes, and I would pay extra for the nightmare horse.

[micycle]

Dude no evil required. I’ll do it if I can find macaroni noodles. Or make macaroni noodles. Can you just make noodles?

And Marshmallow can go anywhere. He’s like magic or something.

Text | Un: Fishblast

[sparkknight]

1. Mushroom, green peppers and ham are super yummy on pizza!

2. The crust can be different? I didn't know it can have different crusts!

3. What's orange soda?

5. Klee thought pizza was a lunch food. Does that mean you can eat pizza at anytime or for dinner?

6. Umm, Klee would order it when it's my night to chose stuff to eat! If the horse it nice enough to bring the pizza, then it doesn't matter if it's scary.

[micycle]

Okay so orange soda is like. Juice? But with bubbles in it? And more sugar. And orange coloring so it stains your tongue and everything.

Text; un R.BECKET

[righthemisphere]

For what it’s worth you can make orange crush you just need orange sugar syrup and someone who can force CO2 into water. I’d try a darkblood.

[micycle]

Oh just orange sugar syrup. Super easy to find at your local medieval marketplace.

[Text][UN:A_Wesker013]

[subject_013]

This brings back memories from medical school and late nights in the laboratory when my research partner would forget to eat.

1. Besides the anchovies: anything but arugula and pineapple. Those belong in salads, not on pizza.

2. Thick crust, otherwise, one might as well be eating cheese with toppings on a very large cracker.

3. No comment.

4. That's a bit outside my purview. We'll say I know more than I care to about what's considered a safe food additive. I suppose the lazy route would be to pour plain soda water into orange juice, if you can obtain it.

5. For me personally, the evening hours are the best. See also late suppers and long nights on shift at the Lumenarium.

6. Probably as often as necessary? I don't much mind how its delivered, as long as it arrives in a timely manner and with the pizza intact. After recently discovering that I seem to own a canterkous white horse who will bite anything that comes near her who isn't me, bloody terrifying horses don't bother me.

[micycle]

I think I can get my hands on orange juice here, but none of it’s the good stuff. It’s all healthy and pulpy.

Also how do you get a horse without knowing?

text; un:lady

[dohaeris]

[sansa is going to answer the one question she understands because she feels this is important:]

I would prefer if the horse didn't appear as if it were dead, but as long as it's been well looked after I suppose I wouldn't mind.

[micycle]

We definitely take care of it well!! It’s just a swamp demon so it’s black and has spooky eyes and it’s wet all the time. Nothing too scary. And he’ll lick your hand if you have potato chips.

text; un: Oracle

[adaine]

1. Um. Cheese, tomato, mushrooms, onions. I don't like to when it gets too overcomplicated or spicy.

[She considers pepperoni too spicy, yes. In fairness she ate her first pizza at 15 years old.]

2. I'm not super confident on this one, because I know there's like... super thin pizzas, and the ones I'm used to are thicker than that, but there might be a super thick pizza and I am not a pizza expert. I lean towards thick.

3. Yes.

4. Yes.

5. It's a dinner food right? Probably towards the evening. Though sometimes my foster father ordered pizza for breakfast.

6. Often. No. I am extremely curious about what you mean but no it wouldn't matter.

[micycle]

[Okay but she's right, pepperoni is just A Lot.]

There's regular crust in between them that's not really thin or thick. I just thought people might want options though. Apparently a bunch of people like to get it super thin and then fold it over which is weird.

You can have it any time of day. You can have anything anytime of day basically.

And it means that our deliverer is a really terrifying horse.

[Do try to keep up.]

Text; un: darkness

[survivalthroughhate]

[Considering Maul discovered what pizza was in Deerington, he has got some Opinions on this matter.]

1. All meat. Or just everything put on it at once.

2. Thick crust. Thin crust defeats the point of putting all the toppings onto it.

3. No.

4. No.

5. Mornings and evenings.

6. Often. No. And no, I don't scare that easily. Unless the horse put a curse upon the pizza, in which case I would not want to eat it.

[micycle]

I'm pretty sure Marshmallow can't cast curses on things but I don't speak horse to ask her. You're probably safe though.

text; un: trashmouth

[measuringdicks]

1. none pizza left beef
2. as thick as the crust on your mom's vagina thanks
3. no
4. also a no figure it out yourself
5. 2:19 AM
6. ok I was gonna keep going with the bit but genuinely I have to ask
how are you going to keep your horrifying nightmare horse monster from eating my face
also genuine: maybe not I have a direwolf patrolling the premises so like probably that's a no

[micycle]

I'm going to ignore about 90% of that for now to ask what the fuck a dire wolf is.

Video UN: RadRidingHood

[onekindsoul]

1. Pineapple, Ham and Bacon!

2. THICK CRUST!

3. Is there any other kind of soda?

4. No idea.

5. From 12:00 am to 12:00 am the next day.

6. Are we talking about Marshmallow? Because I would pay just to have that horse show up at my door.

[micycle]

You know Marshmallow??

voice, sort of

[deadboywalking]

[Voice in that it's bellowed from the other room:]

STOP MENTIONING MARSHMALLOW'S SLUDGE, HE'S SENSITIVE ABOUT IT!!

[micycle]

[Voice in that it's bellowed back from the other other room:]

SHIRO BROUGHT IT UP!

[False.]

text| un: ilikemeat

[velvet_teen]

What's pizza? Is it tasty?

[ This is what Alice usually asks about unfamiliar vocabulary, to be fair. But from context it does imply a certain amount of edibility. ]

6 if it's good I don't care how scary the horse is

[micycle]

[Mike sends back a picture of one that he made this morning. Misshapen, but covered in gobs of delicious cheese.]

It's totally worth having to see a scary horse. I'd look at like ten scary horses to get a pizza.

text: un; apparition

[unphase]

1. Savory tomato sauce, fresh mozzarella, fresh basil, and olive oil.

2. Thin crust.

3. Ew. No.

4. No idea.

5. After nine pm, prior to midnight.

6. Depends. Is the horse fucking terrifying?

[micycle]

I mean there's sugar in mine but it's not sweet or anything. It was just part of the recipe.

And yes, the horse is super fucking terrifying. He's not mean or anything though. Like, he just brought me a glass of water for no reason. I don't even know how, he doesn't have hands.

text: un; an.observer

[thisislife]

1) *Turkey* pepperoni, lots and lots and LOTS of cheese, and tomato sauce

2) Is there a neither, medium crust option?

3) Yes.

4) I don't know. Maybe one of the other Arcane Scholars might.

5) Noon to eight. If I eat after eight, I feel all sluggish and gross the next day.

6) Often. I'm in the middle of trying to open up a business which would drastically cut down on my cooking time. And if it's a horse here, I'm willing to bet that it's definitely fucking terrifying but whatever. It's not the horse's fault.

[micycle]

Okay first of all, what the fuck is wrong with normal pepperoni??

And second of all, what kind of business?

Text | un: alphatwin

[sparklehorror]

1. ANYTHING can be a pizza topping if you believe. And you should try anything! How else will you know if you TOTALLY LOVE something TOTALLY UNEXPECTED!!

2. Thick. Holds more toppings!!

3. YOU BET I DO

4. No but if somebody figured it out it would like, totally eradicate corruption.

5. All of them

6. I bet this horse is B E A U T I F U L

[micycle]

Pickles? Sardines? Cauliflower?

[He's just naming things he refuses to touch.]

And I tried to take a pic for you but he came out all blurry. He does that sometimes.

[Attached is an imperceptible black blob against a perfectly focused dining room.]

text: makes.it.count

[nothinglikea]

[guess who's been watching this post unfold and has quite literally no idea what everyone is talking about. other than the terrifying horse, that's fairly self-explanatory]

What in Heaven's name do all of these questions and answers mean?

[micycle]

I'm just asking for opinions on stuff for my pizza restaurant?

text | un: TripleJ

[kyley_b]

1. so long as it has cheese, my dude.

2. thin. and fuck anybody who comes in here and says 'chicago style' you're allowed to run them out of town.

3. not as an adult but i did as a little kid.

4. uhhh lots of sugar and orange dye?

5. uh anytime duh.

6. the horse can have six heads and fangs i don't give a shit if it gets here in 30 mins or less.

[micycle]

How do you just stop liking orange soda? Is that like how my mom would say she didn't like candy anymore? Because she was definitely lying to herself.