Deer Country Network

[The feed opens up to an unnaturally beautiful garden. For those familiar with Ange Ushiromiyra or Beatrice's magic they'll certainly recognize the golden butterflies fluttering about the and resting upon the golden roses. While this area looks nothing like Trench, one of the carnivorous plants can be seen going to snap at one of the butterflies.

Only for Ruby Rose to pop up on the screen and slices the plant in two with a scythe made of scythe made of pure energy that she had not been seen with before. In fact she seemed incredibly energetic for someone who should be dealing with the draining effect on cold bloods this month. She's also dressed surprisingly formal for her usually very goth tendencies. She quickly dusts herself off and looks to whatever is projecting the Feed.]

Sorry about that. Just dealing with a few nasty pests that stumbled in here.

Speaking of which~!

I thought it would be fun to give everyone a little tour of The Golden Land my beautiful wife, The Golden Witch Ange Ushiromiya has created.

[The feed turns shows off the beautiful Garden, along with a gazebo with a table set for a tea party beneath it, a massive hedge maze that contains various doors that poke out from the overgrowth unnaturally. As they pass by a couple of the doors one might hear a few bangs or something that might sound like finger nails raking on the doors. Ruby seems to ignore it until she notices one slowly start to open and she'll step in to slam it shut and lock it with a key before turning back to the camera.]

Oh, just ignore that! Some people get a little rambunctious waiting for dinner, you know?

[Speaking of dinner, the next door in the hedge maze is open, and it leads to an extravagant kitchen. Inside that kitchen, one Xerxes Break is not making dinner. He is sitting cross-legged on the table, forming bits of crust into an intricate top for a terribly pretty pie. He has already made cookies and some wads of frosting shaped like roses that probably have cupcakes underneath, and is having a grand time. He glances up as Ruby steals a cookie.]

There you are. When you've finished whatever you're up to, come see me, would you? I was thinking we ought to come up with a present to make for Miss Ange. [As he speaks, he picks up a fork and casually hurls it off to the side somewhere. There's a thunk, and the angry gurgling of another carnivorous plant that tried to follow Ruby in.] Since she's made us such a lovely new home, we ought to make something really great for her too, don't you think?

[Quite frankly sitting on tables and throwing cutlery is just normal Break behavior. But those who recognize him may notice that the one red eye he keeps visible has a distinct glow about it, and his ever present omen — who is on the floor nearby, happily chewing up a pumpkin someone has conjured for him — has all of his too many teeth out in a manic doggy grin he cannot quite seem to put away.]

[Ruby bounces on the balls of her feet in excitement.]

That's a great idea! I'll wrap this up quick!

[And quickly begins to float out of the kitchen and into a grand lobby that seems to be just as over grown as everything else. There is a Portrait of her and Ange that eventually stops by and presents with open arms.]

Any who wish to visit this wonderful world created by our Golden Witch, Ange Ushiromiya are welcome to.

But please try not to cause any problems. I'll only politely ask you to leave once.

[And the feed closes with a smile that seems almost a little too sweet as she again grips that large scythe.]

[OOC Purple is Break.

TLDR Ange has made an interdimensional hidey hole centralized There will be a log coming up in the next few days to explore the area and have some fun!]

[She’s been here for over a week now. Time to get the lay of the land. The video opens up to a particularly tall blonde woman with a golden skeletal arm and a smirk. She's here to cause problems on purpose.]

Greetings, hello, salutations. My name is Ianthe Naberius. I’m new in town, twenty two, a princess of Ida, unfortunately single and dreadfully bored!

Now, I come to you today, not only to introduce myself, but to ask something of all of you.

Who do you hate most in Trench and why? I’m trying to meet people, network, but it’s so hard and overwhelmingly positive! So consider this an open invitation. Warn me about that dangerous scoundrel who kicked your puppy, seethe about how much you despise me for whatever reason, tell me about your parasocial hateful fixation on one of the local divinity. It can be a minor slight you want to complain about, a friend of yours who owes you two perfectly intact human skulls, or it can be an actual danger to this lovely little community of ours.

Now, before you try to say “this is childish and stupid!” You’re absolutely right, but it is a necessary part of self care to allow oneself to be an absolute cunt once in a while. [Or all the time, if your name is Ianthe.] So let’s not make any grand claims to being above something like this, mm?

Feel free to use the anonymity feature. Or the privacy feature, I guess, if you’re shy or worried about being fileted like a fish.

[The device that lets him communicate with people over long distances is interesting, but Trevor's seen magic achieve something similar before.

No, what holds his attention is the several different vessels of water available in houses. He's standing in a bathroom where the shower, sink and bath all have the water running.]

...I feel like an idiot talking to myself, but if this really works.

[He looks directly at the camera and then attempts to straighten it out (it isn't) before he clears his throat.]

So citizens of this fine shithole, what do we need this much running water inside for?

The well I get-- [He points at the toilet.] But this all seems a bit much.

Alright, bitches. It's apparently been a hella long time since I've graced anyone in this timeline with my presence. I tried the whole reaching out one by one thing so as not to shock the system, but that shit got time consuming and my attention span is only so strong.

So, if you remember me, tell me, and maybe fill me in on important life developments. Or like. Just leave me a meme that sums up this shit hole the best.

...

Actually, everyone should leave me one of those. Chop, chop, get to it. Whenever Santa's elves aren't busy trying to eat your fucking face off or whatever.

[ She goes to shut off the feed but flicks it on literally two seconds later. ]

Is there weed in this place, by the way? Asking for a friend.

[The feed opens up to Johnny Lawrence staring at the screen like he isn't aware that it's currently life. He's looking incredible thoughtful as his fingers type down a message. It's... very uncharacteristically thoughtful of him. It would almost be hard to peg him as the same person if not for the occasional pause to take a swig of beer.

After a moment he stops. His eyes scan over the screen again as he carefully reads back what he's written. Then there's a little flick of annoyance that shifts to frustration.]

No this is stupid.

[He whacks the screen before standing up putting and shoving it aside lightly.]

You don't apologize. That shows weakness-

And there's no wea-

[The feed shuts off.]

[And a moment later another message comes through via text.]

Dear Robby,

I just wanted to apologize for what happened at Miyagi-Do the other day. I didn't want things to break into a fight, especially not like the one that did. I wanted to come and support you and what you had chosen to do. But I thought if I showed up in any sort of Eagle Fang gear it would be taken as a challenge. It turns out it did anyways as well an insult to your training ground.

All I can say is I'm sorry. You have every right to be mad at me.

If you can find it in your heart, don't blame Paul for this. He's a good kid who just got roped into the mess I made.

Johnny.

-

Dear Daniel LaRusso,

I'm sorry for the scene I caused at your dojo. I didn't mean any disrespect to Miyagi-Do and, I wasn't looking to reopen any can of worms between us.

I've been trying my best to support Robby and respect his wishes to give him space since he got here. And even though he told me that he'd be helping you reopen your dojo. It still hurt that he chose to stick by you instead of give me a chance to prove that I can be there for him.

It's why I showed up to the dojo in the fucking plumbers get up. I panicked and thought if I showed up doing anything karate related it'd be seen as disrespecting your dojo or a direct challenge to what you were doing.

Turns out it was both either way. Go fucking figure I'd screw it up that bad.

I'll do my best to keep my distance from your dojo. But don't blame Paul for this. He's a good kid and he just got pulled into my bullshit.

Johnny.

-

Dear Paul,

I'm sorry for dragging you into that mess. My relationship with Robby and LaRusso is a shit show on the best of days. And instead of owning up to that like a sensei should, I threw you into the middle of it. I put you in a position where you had to face the consequences of every bad decision I've made in my life. You didn't deserve that.

I keep telling you that I'm not going to fail you again. And then I go and do it all over again.

The way you stood up after all of that and apologized for what had happened. I just

I wish I could be half the man you were in that moment.

Don't blame LaRusso or Robby for what happened there. They were just trying to get at my while I hid behind you.

You're the real badass here.

Johnny

[ The feed opens to show two men in the Archives. Martin is tall, and stout, with a friendly if not slightly nervous expression as though he might be a little camera shy. Beside him, Jon Sims looks like an underfed wraith of a man: he's gaunt and exhausted, but at least he holds himself at ease for the first time in months. Those who spend time in the Archives have likely seen him in passing, and it's a shock to see him smiling.

He clears his throat and leans forward to address the camera. The feed speckles into static with the movement, distorting briefly around his eyes. ]

Hello. My name is Jonathan Sims, and I am joined by Martin Blackwood.

Hello! [ Martin lifts a hand to give a small wave to the camera. ]

We were both residents of Deerington, though our memories of the experience are... incomplete.

So we're asking people to come forward with their memories - either Deerington, or Trench, or even at home. Anything weird or supernatural that might help us get a better understanding of what’s happening here - or what might happen, I guess. And how to deal with it? There's a lot to be learned from our own experiences. And - and sometimes it just helps to talk about it?

[ This all sounds well and good, but Jon looks uneasy, frowning down at the sheaf of papers in his hands. He clears his throat and continues, more steadily: ]

Additionally, I have a warning to issue. There have been instances of... unusual books and artifacts being found throughout Trench.

They will probably have a weird effect on you, or the people around you, if you read them, or mess with them or anything. You might even know as soon as you see one that there’s something kind of... off about them?

If you encounter anything which strikes you as [ there's a twist of exasperation at this gross oversimplification: ] cursed, please alert myself or Martin immediately.

We've seen these kinds of things at home before, so we have loads of experience dealing with them. We can help. Just let us know and we'll be right there.

[ Jon looks directly at the camera again, and for a moment visual distortion swallows the feed: there is a shivering bloom of static and an uncanny intensity to his eyes, as though he is truly seeing you, the viewer, from the other side of town. You can make out Martin's nervous smile, and then it clicks off. ]

(( Permissions and info if you'd like to provide a spooky memory! Statements given via the network will not invoke the consequences described. It's safe... for now. ))

So for those not in the know, our house burned down last month.

[ What a way to open a post, right. And yet Ange manages to say it with something very close to a pokerface. Those who know her well may see something at its edges though. An annoyance that starts to bleed more and more into the girl's tone as she speaks on. ]

And not in the 'dumb accident' sense. No, it's because apparently it's socially acceptable in this place to come to someone's house and set it on fire, before bringing your friends inside to start murdering its inhabitants. [ Okay, yes. At this point it's not thiny veiled annoyance anymore. This is obvious annoyance that she doesn't bother to hide. ] And before anyone asks me if I'm alright— I'm fine. Totally fine. I mean, I half-turned into a beast back there, but it's clearly cool. It's fine.

[ It's clearly not fine. The sarcasm is thick.

Though Ange seems to realise that's not why she was supposed to make this message, and manages to snap herself out of passive-aggressive-ville for just long enough to sigh and sound a little bit more neutral as she speaks on. ]

Anyway, we want to rebuild the house, but that's obviously something we need help with. None of us are exactly architects.. I think. I've learned to not question weird Remnant hobbies. [ You never know what those Remnant people are capable of. ] Not to mention we'd need help with the actual physical rebuilding itself too.

We could use help from a lot of people, so if anyone would be willing to help, that'd be great.

Is this thing on?

[ The camera opens on a man, but there is something horribly inhuman about his eyes: they are black from edge to edge, the iris burning with a ring of white light. He is flanked by two skeletons which stand at attention, each with a speck of glowing red in their shadowed eye sockets. ]

Been a while since I had to do this. Hey, hello, kia ora. You face the King Undying, the Necrolord Prime.

( cw: mild body horror (corruption); religious themes; topics of mass death, violent imperialism, human sacrifice likely )

[ A familiar song starts up, and the video opens to reveal a lone young woman, dancing in an abandoned warehouse. The cots on the floor only add to the ambiance. ]

Hey, what’s up, Trench? [ The dancing continues. ] This is a callout post for John Gaius. You might know him? Shit sense of humor, black eyes, calls himself Teacher. He fucked over the ocean, recently. Hard to miss.

( cw: mentions of child death, extinction events, gaslighting, abuse, locked tomb spoilers )

You are seventeen years old.
( a murder of crows )

PIZZA MARKET RESEARCH SURVEY #1

1. What are the best pizza toppings (and nothing weird like anchovies)?

2. Thin crust or thick crust?

3. Do you like orange soda?

4. Do you know how replicate orange soda here?

5. What are your preferred pizza eating hours?

6. How often would you use a horse-based delivery service? Would it depend on what kind of horse showed up at your house with the pizza? Would it matter if the horse was fucking terrifying?

Thank you all for your input.

CWs for entire post/threads within: Discussion of sexual orientation, queerness, discrimination against LGBTQ+, homophobia, transphobia, gender identity, themes of coming out etc.

Coming out is such a fuckin' scam.

There's always someone who has to hear this but damn, don't let anyone guilt you into that shit. You don't have to explain any part of your identity to anyone. Not your friends, not your family, not your significant other. Fuckin' nobody. It's your identity. Yours. Not theirs.

And for the record? Don't sweat it so much if you can't figure it out. Sexuality and romantic attraction and gender identity don't need to be forced into some convenient description you found online. It's fine if you haven't found the right word for it. Language is, oftentimes, limiting to the full expression of our existence.

That shit is so fluid most people be wasting their whole life feeling worried about it because everyone around them goes on and on about how they figured their shit out. Like cool, whatever, congrats for them, but trust me, you're not less valid or whatever just because you ain't got a flag to hang yet. It's fine if you never figure it out. It doesn't have to be a bad thing.

It's okay to be confused for a long time and it's fine to want to figure out how to fix that, but like, seriously, a lot of that confusion does come from comparing yourself to other people and their own experiences.

Whatever. I'm making this whole post private in case anyone has questions or would like to talk.

Consider this April's sex education lesson. I'm simplifying things, obviously, but the point is to open the discussion. So. Discussion Opened.

Rules of Engagement:

1. You don't get to ask me who else is responding to this post or what they are saying. I will shove my foot so far up your ass all you'll taste for the rest of your life will be dirt.

2. You are allowed to ask me about my own shit, but I'm allowed to decline to answer if I get a weird vibe from you.

3. Feel free to go anonymous. I won't pry.

4. Do not force yourself to discuss things you are not ready to discuss. I'm not going to beg you for dirty deetz so if you're not ready, then maybe tab the conversation for later.

5. Judgement-free zone. I have been on every sketchy part of the web and am completely desensitized. Imagine a thousand-yard stare but instead of war-torn countrysides, I'm just seeing thousands of years' worth of explicit Sonic x Knuckles fanart. Which, okay, actually, dope ship. Bad example. But you get my meaning.

Hello, rambunctious children, with your magical self-writing rocks and magic-yous. I smell so many different yous, by the way! All these shapeshifter-sorts, angel-sorts and demon-sorts. Oh, demons, I’d be delighted to meet you, but if you are like the odds of dear Michael, then carry on. I will not bite. You all are welcome to call me what your heart tells you to, but Ammy, as much as Ammako, have always been the ones to soften my spots.

I'm very aware of the sun's disappearance, and these cursed lands have not allowed it to rise as of late, but, if you are to ask for it, in your thoughts and in your hearts, it shall come to you. Your plantlife shall flourish, your waters cleansed, and perhaps the air you breathe will taste less like a boiling pot of rot down your throat. In the meantime, it shall find a way. It always does. Fear not!

And if you have little interest in these things, then tell me, I am most curious: what is faith, to the lot of you? I am in the mood for the Good Chats as I carry on with my duties, yes.

Oh, and one more thing! If anyone manages to come across a bundle of bones that look and smell of the holy sort by the by, may I have them? They are my favorite snack.

[ as a note, people are welcome to find ōkami items! ]

So. Little Trenchlets. I've been here for awhile- [She has been here four days]- and it's hard to keep track of all these people I keep hearing about. So many rumors flying about and it's all so fucking juicy.

So, I'm alone, horny for context, and ready to show mine if you show me yours.

I heard there was a huge party thrown at a house in gaze. A bunch of teens drinking, doing drugs, and kissing with tongues that they just don't know how to use, and providing uninteresting details about alien worms. Completely trashed the place.

Even worse, I heard they robbed the man who let them into his house. Thankfully, he'd warded the objects so if you see a shifty-looking kid or two with their hand blown off, now you know why! There's a moral lesson in there... probably.

Now it's your turn. You don't even have to sign your name. I'm that thirsty for the D(eets).

((Feel free to have your character post "anonymously" about rumors they may have heard about events or themselves in the trench or rumors they want to make up! I highly encourage threadjacking and silliness. Of course, keep it IC, civil, and consider asking permission from others if you think you should.))

[Maul looks very serious but also with a touch of the cat that finally caught the canary as he starts the video.]

I thought I would just give a formal announcement that I have broken the curse which has been on me since Deerington. For those who didn't know about it, it caused me to feel pain whenever I harmed another sentient being. But no more.

[He sounds extremely pleased by that. Though any traces of glee are soon replaced by a murderous expression on his face, his eyes hardening until there is only fury in them.]

If any of you feel like being clever and immediately trying to put another leash upon me, I would advise against it. I didn't retaliate this time but next time I will kill anyone who tries to meddle in my life, whether or not it is my own hand that ends your life.[Maul's got enough people in town who he knows would eagerly kill for him if he asked them to, his brother and mate both chief among them. While he usually prefers to do his own dirty work, he's not willing to put himself through another eight months of being muzzled.] Or I shall simply make your life so miserable that you wish you were dead. After all, most sentient species contain around two hundred to four hundred bones. Consider the fact I know how to break each and every one of them. Or how most species will continue to survive as long as the brain has oxygen and the hearts continue to pump blood regardless of what else is done to their body. Just a thought.

[He pauses and adds on a little at the end.]

As for the three that did it? You already know I don't forgive and I don't forget. Run and hide if you like. I'll come and find you soon enough.