Deer Country Network

[ The video shakes as it comes on like it's been struck by something, and it takes a moment for the picture to orient itself in Rey's cozy bungalow. The scene before us is Rey standing in the middle of her living room with her hands on her temples as she looks helplessly around at a sea of porgs. At least 50 in her small home in a rainbow of colors, both their natural brown and black hues and absurd colors like magenta and lime.

The dismayed look on Rey's face is probably understandable in this moment. One of the porgs is her Omen, that one is a little smaller than most of the others and has wisely fled to the top of the fridge where it looks on in amusement. ]

Oh this is getting out of hand, why do I keep creating you? I'm not even trying to!

[ She looks up, dismayed, and noticed that one of the furry, feathery bodies had turned her camera on. At first the panic on her face amps up but then she presses her lips together, dropping her arms in a helpless open-palmed gesture. ]

Does anyone know how to get rid of things accidentally created with Darkblood abilities?

[ her feed turns on and there's ahiru, a girl, not a duck. ]

Uhm, so . . . I've been here for a year. Which is really long and I was just thinking that . . . it's been so nice. To be here. And to meet new people and try new things. Also make so many friends.

So, uhm, to celebrate . . . I'll give you a compliment! To celebrate everyone. And if I don't know you, uhmmm, I'll give you my best first impression!

[ she bows lightly. ]

I have a request.

Well, a lot of requests. Tiny requests, for lots of people. Not necessarily just tiny people, though — tiny, tall, whatever. That is to say...any people can help. If you're a people? And you're a help? I would greatly appreciate that.

[From off screen, a voice that sounds like Tuck can be heard stage-whispering: "Tell them WHY..." ]

—Oh, right.

[Vyng clears his throat and puts on a pair of tiny-rimmed glasses to make himself at least a little dignified, and he continues.]



. . . You see, Sleepers. There is an artifact of...uh, great personal importance to myself. A relic, if you will, that bears the name of my Druidic family.

But a local has taken stewardship over this relic o' mine. They have offered to relinquish this relic into my custody — but! For a price. Namely, this list of assorted items that I'm attaching at the end of my message.

[With a quiet "this one, right here", he literally places a piece of paper over the camera. "Too close?" Vyng pulls the paper back. He holds it there for awhile. If anybody looks, they can make out the following list:]

( DONATIONS NEEDED, PLEASE & THANK YOU )

[From behind the paper, Vyng asks:]

How long do I have to keep holding this?

[. . . ]

Is this good? I think it's good.

[Eventually, though, a digital copy is included at the tail of this message, with a tiny handwritten note at the bottom:]

⅁N⅄Λ - oxox ¡¡ǝɔuɐʌpɐ uı ⅄⊥
ＴＹ 𝒾𝓃 𝒶𝒹𝓋𝒶𝓃𝒸𝑒 ♥
x0xo - 𝓥𝔂𝓷𝓰

[The video starts in Disaster House, so there's quite the odd assortment of skulls, weaponry and nick-knacks that are obviously visible in the background. Reaper was just putting the finishing touches on a braid for Ahiru's hair, adding a bright yellow bow to the end of it which matched her yellow dress that she wore.

She was seated and he seemed to loom over her sunny self like a dark shadow, but unlike other times he might make a network appearance, he was issuing a low growling hum of a tune as he finished setting the scene that he decided was best.

Wraith, who was recording early on purpose, finally made a low sonorous cry to announce that things were under way.

Reaper looked up from where he was fussing a bit with some of her hair that defied gravity and immediately crossed his arms over his chest to be menacing. He also made certain to send Wraith a scathing look before he was clearing his throat in a raspy growl.]

I’m cooking you the next time you record without a cue, Wraith. [He forced himself to relax.] Are you ready, Ahiru?

[She shifted in her seat, smiling at the peacock and giving an awkward little wave at the Omen.] I-I think so, Mr. Reaper. If you’re sure…

[He set his gloved hands on her shoulders lightly, but anyone else might see the gesture as menacing or maybe just overprotective. He’d promised he’d do this, and now he had worked himself up to just getting to it.] Greetings, Sleepers. Many of you know young Ahiru here, and if you don’t, well, consider this an introduction. Don’t get ideas about hurting her because I will remove your skin with a grapefruit spoon….

[Ahiru stared with a twitching brow, patting his hand lightly.] Mr. Reaper…

Ah. Right, to the crux of this post. Ahiru is seeking love in these parts, as she should. If anyone considers themselves worthy enough to take her for a nice gallivant, step up now. [He pointed an accusing finger.] The rules are: she must be home by nine. She must be unscathed. She must be happy. If any of you dare bring her home unhappy, there will be consequences. [Another pointed finger at the Omen recording.] And keep your hands in your pockets, gentlemen. This is for love not a touchy-feely opportunity

[Ahiru has started that awkward kind of laugh that kids get when their parents are embarrassing them, now avoiding looking at Wraith. Soon enough, Ahiru begins to fidget for a moment before looking at the camera with a smile.] Uhm, this is just — I mean, hi! My name is Ahiru. I practice ballet. I like music and uhm . . . bread! I'm also kind of a duck really, but I'm also a girl and maybe we could . . . spend time together? [She sneaks a glance at Reaper, a little emboldened.] But I have to be back by nine!

[Reaper issued a low chuckle and patted her lightly on the head. It was as close to fondness he might show anyone publicly.] As the lady says. Don’t be shy… [He ends his part with a dangerous laugh.]



[OOC: Reaper is in red & Ahiru is in yellow. One or both of them may reply to comments.]

[ it's a dark and — well it's just a dark month and ahiru never really functions well in the dark. she gets spooked easily which is sort of what happens here. a sequence of events, by a duck.

1. she enters the kitchen. the lights are off and she bumps into various furniture. ]

Ow ow ow ow —

[ 2. her hand brushes against a coat hanging on top of a chair. in her mind, she imagines a snake.

3. She panics and lets out a loud: ]

Quack!

[ 4. ahiru ends up turning into a duck on screen. gasp! not that she has realized she's being recorded.

5. she quickly waddles off and there's the sound of water and she comes back into the kitchen with a relief. ]

— Phew that was clo . . . ooooose, O-Odette! Were you displaying this the whole time?! A-Ah!!

[ ahiru immediately runs in front of the feed, waving her hands frantically. ]

You didn't see that! There's nothing to see! It was . . . uh, uh, a MYSTERY DUCK that broke into the house but it's gone now!

[ alas, ahiru has been well and truly outed as . . . a duck. ]

[Here's a new face. A dead-serious, possibly even angry (or maybe that's just the eyebrows) face.

Fakir doesn't waste time. He holds a picture of a duck up in front of the Omni, taking up the whole screen. It looks...well it doesn't look entirely unlike this duck. Still holding the picture up, he starts to talk.]

If you find this duck in one of the traps around, do not eat it. Bring her to me to look after. I think she followed me from my world - I recognize her from there.

[100% foolproof cover story! Definitely impossible for anyone to poke holes in, given that people may have seen the duck last month and he's only turned up now.

He takes the picture down.]

Thank you.